# A few questions about corn... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 1, 2012, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442 "2012-04-01T04:32:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/1 "2012-04-01T04:32:22Z")
What do you call the best corn on the cob student at cob school? The “A” Corn What did one ear of corn say to the other? You’re aMAIZEing! Why do corn stalks have such great hearing? Because they have so many ears! ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/2 "2012-04-01T04:37:29Z")
What does a pirate pay for corn? ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/3 "2012-04-01T04:45:34Z")
> [@Queen\_Tonya](#): > > What does a pirate pay for corn? A buck an ear. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/4 "2012-04-01T15:09:39Z")
…And what’s a pirate’s favorite letter in corn? ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/5 "2012-04-01T15:27:54Z")
Arrrrrrrrrr!!! Nooooooooooo, the C! ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/6 "2012-04-01T16:49:10Z")
Enough with the corny jokes! ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/7 "2012-04-01T17:32:38Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > Enough with the corny jokes! Aw, shucks. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/8 "2012-04-01T17:39:03Z")
[moderating] Watch it, or it’s off to the cornfield with all of you! [/moderating] “This post has been corned by the Cornist.” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/9 "2012-04-01T17:55:27Z")
> [@Invisible Cornbat](#): > > [moderating] > Watch it, or it’s off to the cornfield with all of you! > [/moderating] > > “This post has been corned by the Cornist.” So sayeth He Who Walks Behind The Rows. ---
**Author:** ![R.P.McMurphy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@R.P.McMurphy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R.P.McMurphy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/10 "2012-04-01T18:56:30Z")
In other words, can you pop a colonel? If you stick him into the ground will he start to grow? ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/11 "2012-04-01T21:07:29Z")
> [@R.P.McMurphy](#): > > In other words, can you pop a colonel? > > If you stick him into the ground will he start to grow? I think you’ll have a major problem, generally speaking. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/12 "2012-04-01T21:30:13Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > I think you’ll have a major problem, generally speaking. Can you just keep these private, please? If not, I’ll have to invoke our new corporal punishment rule. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/13 "2012-04-01T23:00:18Z")
> [@Invisible Cornbat](#): > > Can you just keep these private, please? If not, I’ll have to invoke our new corporal punishment rule. That would make you a rear admiral, right? ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2012, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-few-questions-about-corn/617442/14 "2012-04-01T23:38:31Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > That would make you a rear admiral, right? Hey! Let go of your Staff, Sergeant!