# A Frank Conversation on Erections and Pain **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 18, 2012, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-frank-conversation-on-erections-and-pain/619189 "2012-04-18T18:25:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2012, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-frank-conversation-on-erections-and-pain/619189/61 "2012-04-22T05:34:10Z")
> [@AqualungBats5th](#): > > You have… completely misunderstood my intention. You’ll notice I did not respond, as **Miller** points out, to Sir T-cups. > > A total lack of sexual intimacy is entirely legitimate a reason to break up with someone. The key difference is that communicating that like an adult. “I want to be in a sexual relationship and you don’t, clearly that’s not going to work out between us.” is worlds away from “You need to put out right now or I’m done with you” > > The latter is fucking abusive. Maybe. But not rape. ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2012, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-frank-conversation-on-erections-and-pain/619189/62 "2012-04-22T14:04:33Z")
> [@AqualungBats5th](#): > > The latter is fucking abusive. Nah, it really isn’t. I mean, if he’s going to put her out on the street or something such that she doesn’t have a choice in acquiescence, sure. But relationships are continuing agreements by two people to maintain their joined status. Whenever one of them decides that he or she will be happier unjoined, for whatever reason, they should have the right to make that decision. (And pay whatever consequences it entails, of course.) As I said, ultimatums are usually not good ways to get what you want. But they’re not immoral (at least, if they’re honest they’re not.) –Cliffy ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2012, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-frank-conversation-on-erections-and-pain/619189/63 "2012-04-22T15:05:54Z")
Quiz time! When talking about rape, which is of the following is relevant: 1. Whether she wanted it. 2. Whether she consented to it. Only one answer is correct, **Aqualung** , and it’s not a subjective question. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2012, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-frank-conversation-on-erections-and-pain/619189/64 "2012-04-23T05:04:37Z")
The only time my erection hurts me is when it pokes me in the eye. (and no, I’m not trying self-fellatio) ---
**Author:** ![sjc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@sjc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sjc)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2012, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-frank-conversation-on-erections-and-pain/619189/65 "2012-04-25T21:32:12Z")
I was super skeptical of blue-balls until I had an experience where I was going at it with a woman and was not able to come despite a whole lot of arousal and a whole lot of stimulation. I felt pretty satisfied at the end of it even though I hadn’t ejaculated, so I didn’t bother to finish manually (indeed, it felt like I was so overstimulated that I might not have been able to make it happen anyway). At a certain point afterwards (I can’t remember how long, but it wasn’t too long) I felt a dull ache in my genital area which kept me awake despite wanting to go to sleep. To be fair, there may have been another cause besides simply being aroused, but it definitely felt like it was. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-frank-conversation-on-erections-and-pain/619189.md?page=3)