# A friend tells me he voted twice for Trump **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Tags:** trump\ **Created:** [September 10, 2024, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087 "2024-09-10T21:20:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/81 "2024-09-12T13:29:34Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > I would second this. The common denominator I see in nearly all Trump voters that I know is a raging desire for **justice**. Now, their desire may be warped (tilting at nonexistent windmills or a blatant double standard when _their_ side is unjust), but it’s there. That is not a “desire for justice”. If you buy into the idea of “for my enemies the law, for my friends everything”, that’s just plain corruption. From your second sentence I think you agree that this is the case. But phrasing it as “desire for justice” is motivation-laundering. Selective justice is literally the opposite of justice. If your aim is to be charitable, the most charitable interpretation is that they don’t know or care what justice actually is, and most likely have it confused with vengeance. Definitely not that they hold a “raging desire for justice”. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/82 "2024-09-12T14:20:47Z")
My mom and brother are Trumpists. My daughter is gay. She’s also one of the smartest, kindest, best people ever. Recently she asked my mom, “Why do you vote like you hate gay people, when you know I’m one?” Mom’s response, “I don’t mean to vote against gay people, but I’m voting for what I think is best for everyone.” Naturally I heard about this secondhand. But I think I need to have a hard conversation with my mom, and then… I don’t know. Tell her to fuck off? I’m thinking about it. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/83 "2024-09-12T14:22:11Z")
I see we’re back at this perennial subject. I do not understand how people like @pkbites can be surprised by this, as we’ve had this discussion over and over. Look, this is about friendship. Friendship requires trust. If someone claims to hold certain principles and values, but is willing to discard them because they like a particular candidate, it’s hard to trust them. The bigger the things they are willing to overlook, the more untrustworthy they are. It’s not bigoted to not want to be friends with people who excuse bigotry. The people you hang out with change you. It’s mentally taxing to constantly be on guard lest their bigotry rub off on you. You want to be friends with people you can trust to not shape you in ways that are bad. And, of course, you want to be able to trust them to do what they say they’ll do, and that they actually will act the way they say they will act. No one has a problem with saying you aren’t friends with hateful, mean people, who constantly talk about wanting to hurt others. It’s normal to break off friendships with liars, cheats, swindlers, and the like. Why would it be wrong to feel the same way about people who are willing to overlook all of that? Who enjoy being given permission to be that way themselves? ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/84 "2024-09-12T14:32:59Z")
I’ll say just once more in this thread: I’d try to find out whether he’s intending to vote for Trump for a third time. The specific phrasing of “voted for Trump twice” as opposed to “I’m for Trump” or “I’m a Trump voter” leads me to think that he’s changed his mind or is wavering. At least, if that actually was the friend’s phrasing, and not a paraphrase by the OP and the friend’s language was clear about this year’s vote. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/85 "2024-09-12T15:20:50Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > How boring it must be to surround yourself only with folks who are exactly like you. Better than surrounding yourself with people who are perfectly ok with exterminating certain parts of the population they do not agree with. Voting for Trump is not like liking pineapple on pizza, they are simply horrible people not worth being around. It is sad that so many fit into that basket (not nearly half the country, nearly half of all voters which is a much smaller %) but it is true. I do not associate with Trump voters and my life is better for it. The only sad thing is refusing to acknowledge how horrible they are in order to not rock the boat. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/86 "2024-09-12T15:33:58Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > I would second this. The common denominator I see in nearly all Trump voters that I know is a raging desire for **justice**. Now, their desire may be warped (tilting at nonexistent windmills or a blatant double standard when _their_ side is unjust), but it’s there. I disagree. Trump and his supporters show no regard for justice. What they want is power. Trump and his supporters aren’t saying “We want everyone held to the same standard.” What they’re saying is “When we are weak our enemies oppress us. So we must grow stronger so we can be the ones who oppress them.” ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/87 "2024-09-12T15:40:09Z")
> [@DigitalC](#): > > I do not associate with Trump voters and my life is better for it. How do some of you deal with those at your place of employment? If you’re willing to throw away long term friendships and family relations over something that is no more than just a blip in history I imagine that you must have problems with those that you work with that have opposing political views. Do you scour the employee parking lot for bumper stickers so you know who you are better than? How is your professional dynamic with such people? ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/88 "2024-09-12T15:42:33Z")
Donald Trump’s _own_ VP pick referred to Trump as “America’s Hitler.” Blip? Not really. ---
**Author:** ![Disinfectus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/disinfectus/32/11085_2.png) [@Disinfectus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Disinfectus)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/89 "2024-09-12T15:57:13Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > How do some of you deal with those at your place of employment? If you’re willing to throw away long term friendships and family relations over something that is no more than just a blip in history I imagine that you must have problems with those that you work with that have opposing political views. Do you scour the employee parking lot for bumper stickers so you know who you are better than? How is your professional dynamic with such people? The people I work with are my co-workers, not my friends. I learned a long time ago from my father that business and friendship shouldn’t be mixed. I’m cordial and polite to the people who disagree with me and we never bring it up at work, because that isn’t the place. They are good workers and that’s all that matters when we are together. But I don’t go out to have a beer with them after work. It’s really not that complicated. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/90 "2024-09-12T16:24:13Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > If you’re willing to throw away long term friendships and family relations over something that is no more than just a blip in history I imagine that you must have problems with those that you work with that have opposing political views. I don’t consider an attempted fascist coup to be a blip in history. But discussing politics is inappropriate at work. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/91 "2024-09-12T16:44:54Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > How do some of you deal with those at your place of employment? I have no idea who my employees support and I do not ask. I meant in my personal life, living in Florida I’d have to become a hermit in the Everglades to avoid all Trump supporters. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/92 "2024-09-12T16:52:13Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > Mom’s response, “I don’t mean to vote against gay people, but I’m voting for what I think is best for everyone.” This is one part of the mentality of the “sincere” Trump voter. They believe they are voting for the Big Picture “best for everyone” and that well, if it hurts _you_, can’t you just bear your pain for the sake of the Bigger Picture. > [@DigitalC](#): > > Better than surrounding yourself with people who are perfectly ok with exterminating certain parts of the population they do not agree with _ **If** _ that’s what someone believes being a Trump voter means, that should be indeed a deal breaker. That the thread exists means it is not however a Truth Self-Evident for a huge share of the population, including Trump opponents, that this is what it means. > [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > What they’re saying is “When we are weak our enemies oppress us. So we must grow stronger so we can be the ones who oppress them.” But of course, to **them** , _that_ IS “justice”. Putting people in their place. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/93 "2024-09-12T17:02:50Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > But discussing politics is inappropriate at work. Someone having a bumper sticker on their car isn’t “discussing politics” but it does let you know where they stand. How come one can be cordial and polite to someone who holds such views that they may hardly know but not to long term friends or family. It just seems a little overboard to me and 10 years from now (or less) when Trump is a nonentity (and possibly dead) I think at least some of you will realize how silly you’re being. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/94 "2024-09-12T17:05:56Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > How come one can be cordial and polite to someone who holds such views that they may hardly know but not to long term friends or family. An employer can fire you for inappropriate behavior. Cousin Cletus really cannot. > [@pkbites](#): > > It just seems a little overboard to me and 10 years from now (or less) when Trump is a nonentity (and possibly dead) I think at least some of you will realize how silly you’re being. I think many of us come to a very different conclusion about what history will say about this time, that man, and his supporters. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/95 "2024-09-12T17:08:15Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > This is one part of the mentality of the “sincere” Trump voter. They believe they are voting for the Big Picture “best for everyone” and that well, if it hurts _you_, can’t you just bear your pain for the sake of the Bigger Picture. In fairness, that’s what everyone does. Trumpers are just more open and blatant about it. Most political policies are going to have some collateral damage, such as unintentionally putting some loggers or coal miners out of business, or someone paying more taxes, or resulting in more innocent people being jailed or guilty people walking free, or some people getting into the college of their choice while others get rejected, or either an increase in mass shootings or a decrease in people being able to defend themselves against home invasions. They expect someone to bear pain for the Bigger Picture. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/96 "2024-09-12T17:30:43Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > In fairness, that’s what everyone does. Trumpers are just more open and blatant about it. I think it goes beyond that for Trump and his supporters. They don’t see hurting other people as a necessary price that needs to be paid to achieve some goal. They see hurting other people as the goal. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/97 "2024-09-12T17:33:44Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > It just seems a little overboard to me and 10 years from now (or less) when Trump is a nonentity (and possibly dead) I think at least some of you will realize how silly you’re being. Unless it’s 1930 and we’re discussing how seriously we should be taking this Hitler guy. ---
**Author:** ![CoolHandCox](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/coolhandcox/32/16233_2.png) [@CoolHandCox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CoolHandCox)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/98 "2024-09-12T17:41:57Z")
To the OP, I’m not quite clear on the situation. Your friend voted twice for Trump, and (here’s where I’m guessing) has an opportunity to vote in this upcoming election for Trump/Harris, and you don’t know what he’s going to do? Or was it a mea culpa, I voted for Trump twice but can’t anymore (I live in Canada) or won’t for other reasons. Regardless, I would let it go for now. And depending on the context of how it came up, just acknowledge it (like with a joke suggested above or in some other simple way - glad you voted, it’s important to vote). Then since you haven’t judged him, he may offer more information. Or, if it’s not meant to be responded to, just maybe revisit it much later. It’s not worth a friend, or even being unfriendly. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/99 "2024-09-12T17:41:58Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > I think it goes beyond that for Trump and his supporters. They don’t see hurting other people as a necessary price that needs to be paid to achieve some goal. They see hurting other people as the goal I have to believe that Dung\_Beetle’s mother sincerely believes she’s not acting with the “goal of hurting” her grandchild (though hurt she does). ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2024, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087/100 "2024-09-12T18:04:34Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > I have to believe that Dung\_Beetle’s mother sincerely believes she’s not acting with the “goal of hurting” her grandchild (though hurt she does). I remember seeing an interview from Trump’s first term with somebody who had voted for him. She did it because she wanted the government to crack down on immigrants. But here’s the thing; her husband was an immigrant who had entered the country illegally as a child. And when Trump got elected and began rounding up people - as he had promised and as this woman wanted him to do - her husband got arrested and deported back to a country he hadn’t lived in since he was a child. And this woman was mad. She hadn’t seen her husband as an illegal immigrant and she was shocked when he was arrested. She apparently had thought that the Trump administration would deport other illegal immigrants and her husband was different. But if you had described this woman’s husband to another Trump supporter living in another state, I’m sure they would have told you this man should be deported. Some people are okay with supporting draconian laws because they think those laws will only be applied to anonymous people they don’t know. So they’re shocked when it ends up being their husband, their grandchild, their neighbor - or themselves - who gets targeted. They didn’t realize that they’re just an anonymous person to most people. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-friend-tells-me-he-voted-twice-for-trump/1007087.md?page=6)