# A fucking contest making fucking sentences... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 3, 2000, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557 "2000-11-03T15:41:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/1 "2000-11-03T15:41:45Z")
Well, we all know that the word “fuck,” thanks to its various forms, is probably the most versatile word in the English language. So, let’s have a contest: Who can use the word “fuck” or one of its forms (fucking, fucked, fucker, fucks) the most times in one sentence? This sentence has to make gramatical sense - No run-on sentences are allowed, no other grammatical errors. I will have the lovely and talented **Drain Bead** judge the contributions, since she is about to graduate with an English major. I am not officially entering, but I thought I would start us off with an easily-bested entry: _“The fucking fuckers fucked those fucking fucks by fucking around too fucking much.”_ There. The bar is at **7**. Good fucking luck, all… * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) \*I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Six months, three weeks, four days, 13 hours, 46 minutes and 43 seconds. 8342 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,042.87. Extra life with Drain Bead: 4 weeks, 23 hours, 10 minutes. **David B used me as a cite!** \* ---
**Author:** ![inoci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/50afbb/32.png) [@inoci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inoci)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/2 "2000-11-03T15:48:02Z")
Aw fuck, those fucked up fucking fuckers fucked those fucking other fucking fucked up fucks by fucking around too fucking much with the fucking stuff. 12, but i obviously cheated a little… does that fucking matter? ---
**Author:** ![Whammo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8dc957/32.png) [@Whammo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whammo)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/3 "2000-11-03T15:48:18Z")
In reference to bad sex… Fucking FUCK fucked the fucking fuck up! ---
**Author:** ![rundogrun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/5daacb/32.png) [@rundogrun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rundogrun)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/4 "2000-11-03T15:55:26Z")
Those fuckers fucking in the the fucking fuck room, fucked up fucking bad when they fucked up the fucking fuck swing, so now we’re so fucking fucked, that fucking we can’t fucking fuck any fucking more. Excuse me while I go wash my mouth out with soap. ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/5 "2000-11-03T16:25:39Z")
Fuck, man, it is so fucking fucked up that my fucking fucked up motherfucking fuckhead neighbors are so fucking rude that they fucking fuck so fucking loud and so fucking late into the fucking night that my fucking dog barks like a fucked up rowdy fuck, and now I’m fucking fucked because I can’t get enough fucking sleep, causing me to fuck myself on my fucking job performance, which fucking really fucking sucks. Whew. 23. I need a fucking drink of water now. ---
**Author:** ![Edward\_The\_Head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce73a5/32.png) [@Edward\_The\_Head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edward_The_Head)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/6 "2000-11-03T16:30:03Z")
Who’s fucking bright idea was it to have a fucking stupid fucking contest to fucking see who could fucking use the fucking word “fuck” the fucking most number of fucking times in one fucking sentance? The best though would have to be Steve Martin’s rant in Planes Trains and Automobiles at the rental counter. ---
**Author:** ![inoci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/50afbb/32.png) [@inoci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inoci)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/7 "2000-11-03T16:33:38Z")
maybe this should be amended so that instead of simply the largest number of occurances of the word, we have most unique meanings per sentence. That should be a real challenge, and a lot funnier in the long run. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/8 "2000-11-03T16:59:50Z")
Yesterday, I dropped a bowling ball on my crotch and I screamed out “fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck fuck!!!” The bar is now at 299. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/9 "2000-11-03T17:06:28Z")
Enderw - obsessive-compulsive much? ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/10 "2000-11-03T17:26:29Z")
Trust me, inoci, the judge is taking that into account. ---
**Author:** ![Mojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Mojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mojo)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/11 "2000-11-03T17:43:02Z")
Fucking Jersey fucks. My friend, a Brooklynite, uses this one all the time. Brevity is the soul of wit you know. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/12 "2000-11-03T18:24:47Z")
and fucking tediousness the fucking fuckwad of outward limb fucking flourishes. What’s your point? ---
**Author:** ![oldscratch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ed655f/32.png) [@oldscratch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oldscratch)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/13 "2000-11-03T22:38:06Z")
Fuck, I was fucking walking fucking down-fucking-town, to fucking get a motherfucking hot-fucking-dog, when a fucking wombatfucking fuck, came the fuck up and fucked up my fucking lunch. 13 ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/14 "2000-11-03T23:00:17Z")
In the fucking morning when I’m usually fucking around and fucking wide and awake, I often take a fucking walk down to the fucking river and by the fucking lake, where once in a fucking while I’ll see a fucking duck and a fucking drake, fucking; and as I walk fucking by I sometimes fucking wonder what they would fucking think if they fucking knew that I was right fucking here watching them fucking fuck like little fuckers, although I know that is an absurd fucking thought, and that if I had any fucking sense at all I wouldn’t be wondering what the fuck some fucking ducks were fucking thinking while they fucking fucked like funking minx. ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/15 "2000-11-03T23:04:57Z")
I always liked [Evidently Chicken Town](http://www.onthenet.com.au/~sinister/humour.html#Chicken). I can see the guy who wrote it was not in the best of moods. ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/16 "2000-11-03T23:09:33Z")
This fuckin’ morning, as I was fuckin’ driving to fuckin’ school (which, by the fucking way, is full of fucked-up fuckin’ fuckers who in all fuckin’ likeliness probably spend their fuckin’ days fuckin’ fucking each other in the fuckin’ bathrooms, fucking stupid fucked-up fuckers) I couldn’t fuckin’ help but fuckin’ notice that over on the side of the fuckin’ road there were a couple of fuckin’ deer, fucking, and the stupid fuckers couldn’t even fuckin’ stop their fuckin’ fucking long enough to get the fucking the fuck out of the fuckin’ road, stupid fuckin’ numb-fucks, so I fuckin’ had to fuckin’ run their fuckin’ fucking asses right the fuck off the fuckin’ road, but of fuckin’ course one of the fuckin’ fuck-offs put a fuckin’ dent in teh fuckin’ corner of my fuckin’ car, so I fuckin’ had to fuckin’ stop and fuckin’ look at the fuckin’ thing and all I could fuckin’ say was “Fuck fuck fuckety fuck fuck on a fuckin’ stick.” ---
**Author:** ![Lux\_Fiat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc79bd/32.png) [@Lux\_Fiat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lux_Fiat)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/17 "2000-11-03T23:20:14Z")
If you fucking fucks hadn’t fucking gotten every single fucking fucker with a fucking badge in the entire police de-fucking-partment of the City of L. fuckin’ A. so fucking rabid to plunger-fuck every single fucking member of this gang up the fucking fuck-hole by acting like fucking fuckheads and fucking blowing five fucking cops the fuck away during that fucked-up fucking escape attempt from the fucking bank _after_ you _fucking_ took off your _fucking_ masks, I wouldn’t have been forced into the awkward fucking position of tearing your fucking heads the fuck off your worthless fucking bodies with this here fucking forklift. 28, with all parts of speech represented, I believe. And it tells a nice little story. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/18 "2000-11-03T23:29:15Z")
Fuckin’ eh! ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2000, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/19 "2000-11-03T23:29:56Z")
Fuck me, this is absofuckinglutly the fucking funniest fucking fuck thread I’ve ever fucking read. It has fucking made me fucking forget that I’m fucking pissed coz my fucking profucking-logic video is fucked. I fucking brought it to the fucker who fucking fixes the fuckers and he fucking told me “The fucking fuckers fucked”. Fuck. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2000, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557/20 "2000-11-04T00:11:48Z")
10,000 f_ck_ng green bottles standing on the wall, and if one f_ck_ng green bottle should accidentally fall, there’d be 9,999 f_ck_ng green bottles standing on the wall; 9,999 f_ck_ng green bottles standing on the wall, and if one f_ck_ng green bottle should accidentally fall, there’d be 9,998 f_ck_ng green bottles standing on the wall; can I stop here? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-fucking-contest-making-fucking-sentences/39557.md?page=2)