# A funny, sign **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 6, 2007, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236 "2007-09-06T13:27:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2007, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/61 "2007-09-20T15:59:16Z")
At a small country furniture shop near Sperryville VA, there is/was a sign for years that said: ANTIQUE TABLES MADE DAILY ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2007, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/62 "2007-09-20T16:08:01Z")
> [@](#): > > I’ll take 6 wings, and also 9 of them… I was looking at a DVD catalog just last night that was offering a two disc set for $32.95. Or you could buy the two DVD’s individually for $13.99 each. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2007, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/63 "2007-09-20T16:41:26Z")
[QUOTE=AHunter3] [Freakin’ nails, man!](http://home.earthlink.net/~ahunter/Upload_Download/Freakin_Nails.JPG) [/QUOTE] That reminds me, there’s a beauty parlour in Richmond that has a sandwich board out front with an itemized list of services. It concludes:\*\*[ul][_]FRENCH MAN.[_]TEENAGE FACIAL[\*]FINGERNAIL TAKE-OFF[/ul]\*\*This has always sounded vaguely like an obscure subgenre of pornography to me. ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2007, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/64 "2007-09-20T19:11:02Z")
I used to rent a parking place behind a downtown building. The property owner checked every few hours to make sure that no unauthorized vehicles were present, and if anyone parked there without paying, the car would be hauled away. On the fence was a sign that said CALL BUILDING MANAGER FOR INFORMATION ABOUT TOAD CARS. ---
**Author:** ![Offkenter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f08c70/32.png) [@Offkenter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Offkenter)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2007, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/65 "2007-09-20T21:13:38Z")
It’s not misspelled, but this book cover had me and a friend fall down laughing once: [Link to Amazon](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/images/0679422978/sr=1-2/qid=1190322444/ref=dp_image_0/103-3331539-6684631?ie=UTF8&n=283155&s=books&qid=1190322444&sr=1-2) I think it’s by the author who wrote “How to Serve man” ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Rosewater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@Mr.Rosewater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Rosewater)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2007, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/66 "2007-09-20T21:18:05Z")
I found this picture online, but I have seen a similar example at a local pet store. [Fish Grooming](http://www.flickr.com/photos/angerboy/1030672132/) ---
**Author:** ![MrSquishy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9e5f3/32.png) [@MrSquishy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrSquishy)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2007, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/67 "2007-09-20T21:38:39Z")
[QUOTE=Dung Beetle] There is a drawer near the coffeemaker where I work labeled: Spoon’s, Forks, & Knifes. [/QUOTE] These are the ones I really don’t get. You think pluralizing “spoon” requires an apostrophe-‘s’, but “fork” does not. What do you think the rule is? Words that end in ‘n’? ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2007, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/68 "2007-09-22T02:10:17Z")
On Rt 1, there was a marquee under a McDonalds sign advertising a new sandwich. “Try Our Tird Pounder” At last, Truth in Advertising…! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2007, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/69 "2007-09-22T02:44:09Z")
This doesn’t really count, because it was an intentional prank, but this seems as good a place as any to mention it. Way back in Texas, Dairy Queen had a big sign on a pole beneath its logo sign. Maybe 10 or 12 feet in the air. One of those signs with removable letters. One time on that sign, they were advertising their Country Basket. One night, thoroughly soused, we scrambled up the pole and by removing certain of the letters and pushing the others together, suddenly Dairy Queen waas advertising a Cunt Basket. No one working there noticed until well into the next afternoon. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cyberhwk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Cyberhwk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyberhwk)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2007, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/70 "2007-09-22T06:28:43Z")
I worked in a casino where part of our closing paperwork was to calculate “_RUFF_ win/loss.” I never stopped laughing at it. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2007, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/71 "2007-09-22T13:23:28Z")
And speaking of Nepal, the bus we were riding on upcountry stopped for a break at a place with a sign that said “Fooding and Sleeping Good Here.” And in the town of Pokhara, Nepal, was the Comfortably Numb Guesthouse. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2007, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/72 "2007-09-23T13:00:00Z")
[QUOTE=fachverwirrt] The Tube in London has this sign on its trains: _Caution sliding doors._ I did my part and said “be careful, doors” whenever I exited. I don’t know if it did any good. [/QUOTE] I want to know what all these **Caution Horses** are that are driven around in floats near the local racecourse. There’s a construction site near here that mandates **safety helmets must be worn** , but many I see on site are quite new looking and unscuffed. And finally I’d like to find the source for the **100% virgin pulp** they use in some of the toilet paper around here. ---
**Author:** ![Khampelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2007, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/73 "2007-09-24T01:45:46Z")
OK, I read it in this month’s Reader’s Digest, but a couple three websites also report seeing the restaurant sign that encourages parents to bring their children. A sign where a missing puntuation mark caused tears to stream down my face. Kids eat free Live clown every Tuesday. ---
**Author:** ![Cardinal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal/32/4000_2.png) [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2007, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/74 "2007-09-24T01:57:02Z")
[QUOTE=whiterabbit] There’s the sign hanging over Main Street in the next town south of here advertising high school football on **Friday’s** …_twitch__twitch_ [/QUOTE] When I worked in Bakersfield, CA a few years ago, a local tv station had slides that advertised some program as being shown on Tuesday’s. No, it’s not known for its academics, is Bakersfield. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2007, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/75 "2007-09-24T03:37:37Z")
[QUOTE=Askance] There’s a construction site near here that mandates **safety helmets must be worn** , but many I see on site are quite new looking and unscuffed. [/QUOTE] The lawlessness of Londoners is clearly demonstrated by the number of people going up and down the escalators to and from the London Underground without a pooch, despite the signs clearly saying “ **Dogs must be carried** ”. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2007, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/76 "2007-09-24T03:56:46Z")
> [@](#): > > Kids eat free Live clown every Tuesday. It’s the only way you’re sure they’re fresh. ---
**Author:** ![Random](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/57b2e6/32.png) [@Random](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Random)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2007, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236/77 "2007-09-24T04:25:44Z")
[QUOTE=Little Nemo] It’s the only way you’re sure they’re fresh. [/QUOTE] I dunno about that. Tasted funny. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-funny-sign/418236.md?page=3)