# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 134
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2021, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2664 "2021-02-08T22:01:42Z")
“You know, if we form a dodgeball team and win the annual tournament in Las Vegas, we might be able to afford a bigger gym.” ---
**Author:** ![Bicycle\_Bill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bicycle_bill/32/6208_2.png) [@Bicycle\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bicycle_Bill)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2021, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2665 "2021-02-08T22:51:32Z")
“Assume crash positions, everybody!” _ **-“BB”-** _ ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2021, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2666 "2021-02-09T02:22:26Z")
Dunno, Janet. Maybe you were right about forming an _a cappella_ group instead. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2021, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2667 "2021-02-09T02:34:01Z")
It took more than a few tries to get the choreography for “The Time Warp” in the _Rocky Horror Picture Show_ just right. ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2021, 9:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2668 "2021-02-09T09:47:07Z")
NEWSFLASH: “Citizens are warned to be on the lookout for members of the Leotard Gang.” Little known fact: Writers of the Flash Gordon serial came up with an early version of the holodeck. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2021, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2669 "2021-02-09T10:29:33Z")
From the book “_How To Satisfy Your Man_”, Chapter 3: Positions of Fornication. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2021, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2670 "2021-02-09T11:53:45Z")
“We must! We must! We must develop our bust!” ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2021, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2671 "2021-02-09T21:41:15Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > We must! We must! We must develop our bust!” I’m going to call it for Knowed\_Out, but it was a close run thing with Bicycle\_Bill’s “Assume crash positions, everybody.” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2672 "2021-02-10T01:09:19Z")
> [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](#): > > Yeah. My 1960s Sally Fields fantasies are a little muddled. I know I’m late, but this cracked me up. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2673 "2021-02-10T13:11:14Z")
Truth to tell, I thought Prof had it tied up, so I just pulled something out of left field. [![](https://justsomething.co/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/15-absurd-pictures-t-14.jpeg) ](https://justsomething.co/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/15-absurd-pictures-t-14.jpeg) ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2674 "2021-02-10T13:11:58Z")
_Exterminate! Exterminate!_ ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2675 "2021-02-10T13:25:29Z")
“Excuse me officer, but what kind of fine am I looking at if I have my grandkids killed?” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2676 "2021-02-10T13:26:43Z")
Professor X’s transition is coming along just fine. ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2677 "2021-02-10T13:40:27Z")
“Officer, I TOLD them that the wheelchair lifts on the new buses are too strong.” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2678 "2021-02-10T13:45:10Z")
“Have _you_ smelled the inside of one of these bus shelters?” ---
**Author:** ![FastDan1](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fastdan1/32/427_2.png) [@FastDan1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FastDan1)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2679 "2021-02-10T15:25:48Z")
Sorry ma’am, I’m an American. I meant ground floor, not first floor. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2680 "2021-02-10T17:37:27Z")
London’s prototype handicap accessible double-decker bus stop is a success! ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2021, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2681 "2021-02-10T18:23:15Z")
Contact your durable medical supply company and ask for it by name: The Boeing Apache Wheelchair. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2682 "2021-02-11T04:42:46Z")
“Now see here, Mrs Crabtree. I’ve warned you about practicing your parkour on public structures.” ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2683 "2021-02-11T12:29:24Z")
> [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#): > > Contact your durable medical supply company and ask for it by name: The Boeing Apache Wheelchair. > [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](#): > > “Now see here, Mrs Crabtree. I’ve warned you about practicing your parkour on public structures.” I like both of these and wish there could be two winners. I’ll go with Boeing Apache Wheelchair since it could be a band name. Congrats **Mean\_Mr.Mustard**! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=133) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=135)