# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 135
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2684 "2021-02-11T23:15:01Z")
Thank you! [https://imgur.com/yRgfwQX](https://imgur.com/yRgfwQX) ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2685 "2021-02-11T23:20:25Z")
_The Duke of Clarence seemed to enjoy Richard’s initial attempt a bit too much, so Richard started thinking about finding a butt of Malmsey_ ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2686 "2021-02-11T23:34:25Z")
It’s a Sicilian message. “He sleeps with the fishes.” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2687 "2021-02-11T23:43:42Z")
With all the money he saved by bathing in his lightly used laundry water, Sergei was able to re-tile his entire bathroom! ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2688 "2021-02-11T23:50:17Z")
Next remodel, Sergei will shell out for the shrink-resistant tub. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2021, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2689 "2021-02-11T23:53:05Z")
Our new Mega-Monster Shower Head will dwarf the size of your tub! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2690 "2021-02-12T00:03:06Z")
“I thought it would be a good idea, but it’s not. It’s hard to move my arms, and I can’t reach the soap. And if I could, there’s no room to lather up. And furthermore–” “Bob, you’ve been moaning and complaining ever since you got that tub. Put a lid on it, willya?” “No-o-o-o!” ---
**Author:** ![Baal\_Houtham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baal_houtham/32/13604_2.png) [@Baal\_Houtham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baal_Houtham)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2691 "2021-02-12T03:33:21Z")
Use mild non-abrasive soap to clean your “Loved One In Lucite.” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2692 "2021-02-12T03:48:34Z")
Bob… ---
**Author:** ![FastDan1](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fastdan1/32/427_2.png) [@FastDan1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FastDan1)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2693 "2021-02-12T04:49:29Z")
Pierre refuses to take a break from his training to go over Niagara Falls. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2694 "2021-02-12T04:56:06Z")
In Soviet Russia, shower takes _YOU_! ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2695 "2021-02-12T10:34:32Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > In Soviet Russia, shower takes _YOU_! I roll my eyes every single time I see this tired Soviet Russia trope on the dope (Hey! Trope on the Dope = band name!). I never once found it the least bit amusing. Until now. This response made me laugh. It is _perfect_ for this photo. Congrats, **needscoffee** , you’re up! ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2696 "2021-02-12T10:38:21Z")
Art installation: Dali meets Escher. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2697 "2021-02-12T14:52:31Z")
Thanks! New pic: [![Imgur](https://i.imgur.com/sfQhZYO.jpeg "imgur.com") ](https://imgur.com/sfQhZYO) ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2698 "2021-02-12T15:30:29Z")
Snort! Who’d want a coat made from Dalmatians?? ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2699 "2021-02-12T19:03:10Z")
Tim Burton’s film version of _Cats_ didn’t make it to the screen, for some reason. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2700 "2021-02-12T19:38:29Z")
No, you may _not_ pet my pussy. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2701 "2021-02-12T21:02:39Z")
Unfortunately, Vincent died of a heart attack several days after this picture was taken. The police didn’t find him for 7 days. Needless to say, the cats were not starving. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2702 "2021-02-12T21:08:58Z")
“My plan to take over the world with cats is purrrfect!” ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2021, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/2703 "2021-02-12T21:31:29Z")
Tim Burton’s original version, Vincent Catfur Chest, was found unworkable. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=134) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=136)