# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 187
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2021, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3726 "2021-05-28T19:48:41Z")
Grown-up Ralphie Parker enjoys Christmas. Aunt Clara, still confused about his age, stopped sending the bunny suits and sent dolls instead. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2021, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3727 "2021-05-28T20:19:52Z")
When his Elves, Reindeer, and barber went on strike, Santa had to make some last minute hires before Christmas Eve. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2021, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3728 "2021-05-28T21:00:51Z")
[What fetishes don’t work well in real life?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-fetishes-dont-work-well-in-real-life/942857/77) ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2021, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3729 "2021-05-29T10:39:35Z")
Local Amway Independent Business Consultant down to his last two family members for holiday gatherings. ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2021, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3730 "2021-05-29T11:02:44Z")
I SAID that I just wanted “dough” for Christmas. So my family shopped at “everything do…” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2021, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3731 "2021-05-29T12:52:03Z")
I’m an Elf. Sure, my wife’s a bitch, but at least our daughter looks like me. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2021, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3732 "2021-05-29T18:45:09Z")
> [@Bonum\_Legatum](#): > > Grown-up Ralphie Parker enjoys Christmas. Aunt Clara, still confused about his age, stopped sending the bunny suits and sent dolls instead. You win the stuck tongue on pole award. Take it away Bonum! ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2021, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3733 "2021-05-29T20:23:31Z")
Doggone it! [[Album] I don't have a coin, but I've been 100% sober for 365 days and counting. ![](https://i.imgur.com/yhq4y4Y.jpeg?fb "I don") ](https://imgur.com/gallery/8DBgSxO) ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2021, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3734 "2021-05-29T20:50:05Z")
“I’ll be adding what I call ‘a little hair of the dog that bit you’ to this batch of chili.” ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3735 "2021-05-30T03:53:09Z")
“You’ve gotta help me out here. Opening cans and jars without thumbs is damn near impossible.” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3736 "2021-05-30T12:50:12Z")
The Original Chili Dog ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3737 "2021-05-30T13:30:50Z")
And those are the simple three ingredients in chili con canine…_in toto_. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3738 "2021-05-30T14:28:18Z")
Yes it’s a boring job, but I get to sit on the counter without getting shooed off. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3739 "2021-05-30T15:50:07Z")
Chili con Canine ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3740 "2021-05-30T18:28:16Z")
Awarded to Prof. Pepperwinkle, for The Original Chili Dog. Honorable mention to Spoons because of the similarity to the Far Side cartoon captioned: “Well, there it goes again…And Here we sit without opposable thumbs.” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3741 "2021-05-30T23:04:41Z")
Thanks! Here comes Summer! [![](https://worldwideinterweb.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/funny-pictures-at-the-beach.jpg) ](https://worldwideinterweb.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/funny-pictures-at-the-beach.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3742 "2021-05-30T23:15:27Z")
Sally Fields lost her mind there for a while in the Sixties. (Didn’t we already do this one?) ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3743 "2021-05-30T23:17:29Z")
> [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](#): > > (Didn’t we already do this one?) Yes, we did. @Prof.Pepperwinkle, do you have another picture? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3744 "2021-05-30T23:21:43Z")
Oops! Sorry, how 'bout… [![](https://www.askideas.com/media/36/Couple-Egg-On-Picnic-Funny-Faces-Picture.jpg) ](https://www.askideas.com/media/36/Couple-Egg-On-Picnic-Funny-Faces-Picture.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2021, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/3745 "2021-05-31T00:00:20Z")
“Are you sure this a safe park for a picnic? I heard there were poachers.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=186) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=188)