# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1)
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731
**Category:** Thread Games
**Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 306
### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2022, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6107 "2022-06-15T14:20:36Z")
She still ain’t married? We need to do a special layin’ on uh hands!
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### Author:  [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2022, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6108 "2022-06-15T15:37:48Z")
Demon dandruff flakes, we REBUKE thee!
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### Author:  [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2022, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6109 "2022-06-15T15:44:56Z")
Reminder: NEVER take the children to the barber college on a slow night.
The whole family was pleased at junior’s “Cousin IT” costume.
“…and that’s when I got the idea for the Zombie canon.”
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### Author:  [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2022, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6110 "2022-06-15T17:19:43Z")
Cut scene from The Exorcist. Shortly after the faith healing failed, Regan’s mom called Fr. Merin.
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### Author:  [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2022, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6111 "2022-06-15T21:52:15Z")
At Holy Roller Hair Salons, if you don’t look good, you burn in Hell for eternity.
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### Author:  [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)
#### Post date: [June 16, 2022, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6112 "2022-06-16T21:33:00Z")
Oh, my, all so hilarious. But it’s a hands on to
[Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
[Jun 15](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest/915731/6107)
She still ain’t married? We need to do a special layin’ on uh hands!
Go, Slithy!
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [June 16, 2022, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6113 "2022-06-16T22:40:58Z")
[ ](https://www-history-com.cdn.ampproject.org/ii/F2/s/www.history.com/.image/c_fit%2Ccs_srgb%2Cfl_progressive%2Cq_auto:good%2Cw_674/MTY1NDI3MDM1Mzc4ODIwNjMz/george-washington-death-gettyimages-625141572.jpg)
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### Author:  [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)
#### Post date: [June 16, 2022, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6114 "2022-06-16T22:44:33Z")
“He’s not looking improved. Better bleed him again.”
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [June 16, 2022, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6115 "2022-06-16T23:29:14Z")
Just for the hell of it, I’ll drop one in:
Dr. “Now he belongs to the ages.”
Gentleman in far right of frame: “Great. So how about maybe now I don’t have to belong to FUCKING ANYBODY?”
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### Author:  [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)
#### Post date: [June 16, 2022, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6116 "2022-06-16T23:51:41Z")
Months to paint this and Americans will remember him from that other two-bit portrait…
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### Author:  [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2022, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6117 "2022-06-17T01:42:14Z")
“Dibs on the wig!”
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### Author:  [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2022, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6118 "2022-06-17T02:26:19Z")
“Tell the slaves I was just kidding.”
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### Author:  [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2022, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6119 "2022-06-17T05:01:47Z")
George, do suppose you could be kind enough to hold your gas until we all left?
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### Author:  [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2022, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6120 "2022-06-17T12:11:24Z")
When I should die, think only this of me: That there’s some corner of a foreign field that is forever England.
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [June 17, 2022, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6121 "2022-06-17T23:04:44Z")
> [@boson](#):
>
> George, do suppose you could be kind enough to hold your gas until we all left?
Because more than ever, what the world needs now is George Washington fart jokes, game to @boson
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### Author:  [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2022, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6122 "2022-06-18T02:52:06Z")
Thanks, Slithy, but pass. Don’t know how to load an image. Maybe on my ipad and use google lens.
PASS
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2022, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6123 "2022-06-18T02:54:54Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#):
>
> “Dibs on the wig!”
This entry was 2nd place, and may possibly have made 1st if it’d been “teeth.”
@Knowed_Out have at it.
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### Author:  [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2022, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6124 "2022-06-18T15:59:01Z")
Moving on with furry things…
[ ](https://static01.nyt.com/images/2020/02/07/learning/VTS02-10-20LN-2/VTS02-10-20LN-2-mobileMasterAt3x.jpg)
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2022, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6125 "2022-06-18T16:13:26Z")
For an additional bonus, we don’t need a church bell. He just rattles his dags.
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### Author:  [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2022, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6126 "2022-06-18T16:21:48Z")
By the time Mary was in college, her pet following her to school wasn’t as cute anymore.
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