# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1)
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731
**Category:** Thread Games
**Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 319
### Author:  [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)
#### Post date: [August 2, 2022, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6367 "2022-08-02T17:23:39Z")
“Hang it in the Hieronymus Bosch wing.”
---
### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [August 2, 2022, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6368 "2022-08-02T17:24:49Z")
We promise that for Thomas Kinkade Galleries franchisees who fail to make quota, retribution will be swift and merciless. Our mission at Thomas Kinkade Galleries is to make our world a happier place, and so failure cannot be tolerated.
---
### Author:  [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)
#### Post date: [August 2, 2022, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6369 "2022-08-02T18:00:19Z")
Human bondage means different things to different people (hey, it won the last one…)
---
### Author:  [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)
#### Post date: [August 2, 2022, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6370 "2022-08-02T18:11:18Z")
Or, as we like to call it around here, Tuesday.
---
### Author:  [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)
#### Post date: [August 2, 2022, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6371 "2022-08-02T18:12:18Z")
The Secret Liberal Agenda, as reported by Ms. Boebert
---
### Author:  [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)
#### Post date: [August 2, 2022, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6372 "2022-08-02T21:20:31Z")
“Goin’ to the chapel and we’re gonna get marriGAHHHHH!”
---
### Author:  [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6373 "2022-08-03T00:01:07Z")
What sermons were like when ministers considered Paperback book covers sinful.
---
### Author:  [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6374 "2022-08-03T14:41:08Z")
Doc, I think my sex fantasies are getting 'way too complicated. I mean, “ravished by beasts,” OK. But WW II bombers?
---
### Author:  [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6375 "2022-08-03T19:14:04Z")
All funny, but this one goes to…
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#):
>
> Or, as we like to call it around here, Tuesday.
---
### Author:  [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6376 "2022-08-03T19:30:19Z")
Thanks!
I’ve been saving this one all week…
[https://tse3.mm.bing.net/th/id/OIP.ov7U9UzvKNhe\_9vsu-wLzgHaE7?pid=ImgDet&rs=1](https://tse3.mm.bing.net/th/id/OIP.ov7U9UzvKNhe_9vsu-wLzgHaE7?pid=ImgDet&rs=1)
---
### Author:  [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6377 "2022-08-03T19:53:23Z")
I’m afraid that that the more conservative elements will never accept your suggestion for new vestments.
So I turn this knob and…HEY, I’m receiving Vatican shortwave radio, clear as a bell!
---
### Author:  [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6378 "2022-08-03T20:07:24Z")
After staring too long at [The Parrot](https://creepypasta.fandom.com/wiki/The_Parrot) , he began to act strangely…
---
### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6379 "2022-08-03T20:08:35Z")
(Looking at the rawhide straps) “Thanks for the war bonnet, but I’ll pass on the Holy Ghost Dance.”
---
### Author:  [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6380 "2022-08-03T21:36:55Z")
“Hey, this is only the second silliest hat I own!”
---
### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6381 "2022-08-03T22:13:18Z")
Popemobile top speed: 160 mph.
Bison top speed: 35 mph.
“Hand me that halberd, Swiss-boy. I got me some jabbin’ ahead!”
---
### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [August 3, 2022, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6382 "2022-08-03T22:18:41Z")
“So, in the spirit of ecumenicalism, would you like to know how to shuffle pedophile medicine men from council fire to council fire?”
---
### Author:  [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2022, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6383 "2022-08-04T01:31:18Z")
“Fine, I’m wearing the stupid feather bonnet. Now will you forgive us for forcibly converting your people?”
---
### Author:  [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2022, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6384 "2022-08-04T05:13:41Z")
I am deeply honored. Sincerely. Now…a…you want me to invade whom? Where?
---
### Author:  [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2022, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6385 "2022-08-04T17:44:01Z")
Love 'em all!
Runner up…
> [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](#):
>
> “Hey, this is only the second silliest hat I own!”
And the winner…
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#):
>
> Popemobile top speed: 160 mph.
> Bison top speed: 35 mph.
>
> “Hand me that halberd, Swiss-boy. I got me some jabbin’ ahead!”
😜
---
### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [August 4, 2022, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6386 "2022-08-04T18:44:09Z")
In the fine art category, there are so many paintings by Gerome begging for it, but I’ll put this one out for you guys to whet your wits on:
[Reception of the Grand Condé at Versailles - Wikipedia](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reception_of_the_Grand_Cond%C3%A9_at_Versailles#/media/File%3AGeromeconde.jpg)
[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=318)
[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=320)