# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 340
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6787 "2022-11-02T16:09:38Z")
Bringin’ home the bacon! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6788 "2022-11-02T18:52:39Z")
“Ohh, Kermie …” ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6789 "2022-11-02T20:58:47Z")
“The safe word is Oscar Mayer” ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6790 "2022-11-02T21:14:10Z")
> [@Tibby](#): > > When you can’t afford an expensive S&M escort. I was hoping for something kinky. Your turn Tibby! ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6791 "2022-11-02T23:25:36Z")
Ok, this one looks fun: [![Imgur](https://i.imgur.com/BBvL6l6.jpeg "Smokin") ](https://imgur.com/BBvL6l6) ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6792 "2022-11-03T00:58:39Z")
Adam got so wasted he couldn’t even light his own blunt ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6793 "2022-11-03T01:45:24Z")
“Smoke _good_. Fire _bad_. Kill me now.” ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6794 "2022-11-03T02:12:35Z")
The effects of smoking three packs a day for forty years. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6795 "2022-11-03T10:50:52Z")
Fire not always bad. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 11:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6796 "2022-11-03T11:14:29Z")
Benson & Hedges 100: Just A Silly Millimeter Longer ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6797 "2022-11-03T15:55:59Z")
> [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](#): > > Adam got so wasted he couldn’t even light his own blunt Frankie toking a blunt is darned funny. Batter up @Dr.Winston_Oboogie, you are the winner! ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6798 "2022-11-03T16:22:52Z")
Thanks. A smart man knows “Frankenstein” wasn’t the monster. A wise man knows he was. Most people say “Don’t be a dick about it.” OK, let’s try this: [![](https://fandomwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Cringe-Reality-TV-Shows-That-Are-Wrongfully-Taking-Over-Television-2-728x409.jpg) ](https://fandomwire.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Cringe-Reality-TV-Shows-That-Are-Wrongfully-Taking-Over-Television-2-728x409.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6799 "2022-11-03T17:11:58Z")
A _toast_ to _symbolism_! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6800 "2022-11-03T19:05:07Z")
Your host, the Toastmonster General, Donald Rump and the U.K.'s own Lymph Truss. ---
**Author:** ![Oly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/oly/32/8255_2.png) [@Oly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oly)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6801 "2022-11-04T22:50:33Z")
Fun was being had by all until the Ferengi, drunk on Risan Champagne, mistook the Green Woman’s head for raspberry ambrosia, and stuck a lady finger in it. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6802 "2022-11-05T00:26:36Z")
Say what you will, Maybelline pays its human test subjects well. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6803 "2022-11-05T12:23:56Z")
> [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](#): > > Say what you will, Maybelline pays its human test subjects well We’ll give it to Mr. Fudd this time. Elmer, take it away! ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6804 "2022-11-05T14:40:34Z")
[![](https://allthatsinteresting.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/trepanning.jpg) ](https://allthatsinteresting.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/trepanning.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6805 "2022-11-05T17:11:01Z")
The neurosurgical team at Massachusetts General Hospital is getting a little long in the tooth. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/6806 "2022-11-05T17:25:52Z")
Six drops of the essence of terror, five drops of sinister sauce… When the stirring’s done, may I like the spoon? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=339) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=341)