# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 366
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2023, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7307 "2023-01-27T06:50:32Z")
[![](http://static.demilked.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/5aaa1cb841280-funny-weird-wtf-stock-photos-1-5a39121d2fd9b__700.jpg) ](http://static.demilked.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/5aaa1cb841280-funny-weird-wtf-stock-photos-1-5a39121d2fd9b__700.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2023, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7308 "2023-01-27T07:10:47Z")
Bishop of the Damned: The Early Years ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2023, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7309 "2023-01-27T09:56:16Z")
Don’t cry, sweetie. You’ve still got nine fingers left. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2023, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7310 "2023-01-27T18:41:33Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > Bishop of the Damned: The Early Years Don’t know you intended this, but Bishop from _Aliens_ did this to prove his programming did not allow him to harm humans. [spoilered link for the squeamish](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ws0dZEcbBWs) ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2023, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7311 "2023-01-27T18:47:20Z")
(Back in play) “Ashley, we’re going to keep doing this until you get it right.” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2023, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7312 "2023-01-27T19:28:14Z")
> [@knoodler](#): > > Don’t know you intended this, but Bishop from _Aliens_ did this to prove his programming did not allow him to harm humans I did intend it, but didn’t know if it was obvious. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2023, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7313 "2023-01-28T03:43:48Z")
“Walk it off, dear.” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2023, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7314 "2023-01-28T15:21:39Z")
The winner > [@knoodler](#): > > “Ashley, we’re going to keep doing this until you get it right.” ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2023, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7315 "2023-01-28T17:43:02Z")
Thanks Elmer! [![](https://www.dogboardingportland.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/dog-acting-weird-during-quarantine-portland.jpg) ](https://www.dogboardingportland.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/dog-acting-weird-during-quarantine-portland.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2023, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7316 "2023-01-28T18:18:11Z")
Stimpy! You fool! Get back here and help me! ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2023, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7317 "2023-01-28T20:55:06Z")
Shih Tzu shiatsu. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2023, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7318 "2023-01-29T19:57:56Z")
Stay away from my giblets! ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7319 "2023-01-30T02:11:22Z")
Let’s see how much you like it when I remove YOUR testicles! ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7320 "2023-01-30T15:54:09Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > Shih Tzu shiatsu. Ding! We have a winner! Take it away, @Lumpy! ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7321 "2023-01-30T18:26:04Z")
[![](https://www.thefirearmsforum.com/attachments/9-unbelievable-instances-of-animals-in-the-military-png.136392/) ](https://www.thefirearmsforum.com/attachments/9-unbelievable-instances-of-animals-in-the-military-png.136392/) ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7322 "2023-01-30T18:29:08Z")
Note that neither the rider nor his mount are wearing pajamas. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7323 "2023-01-30T18:33:29Z")
The anachronisms in Cecil B. DeMille’s _Hannibal_ are pretty egregious. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7324 "2023-01-30T19:41:54Z")
That pachyderm’s packin’! ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7325 "2023-01-30T21:56:26Z")
That elephant is so depressed, he’s hoping the next shot is through the back of his head. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2023, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/7326 "2023-01-30T23:14:44Z")
Watch the recoil. It’s got a real kick to it! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=365) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=367)