# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 420
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2023, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8387 "2023-09-13T17:24:06Z")
Beijing P.S #3 discovered that the kindergarteners were a bit too young for the quadratic formula lesson. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2023, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8388 "2023-09-13T17:38:08Z")
In the East they don’t practice “duck and cover”, they practice “protect your nads”. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2023, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8389 "2023-09-13T19:00:45Z")
Active Shooter Drill #16: playing possum ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8390 "2023-09-14T00:24:36Z")
The school budget got cut so bad, they couldn’t afford sleeping mats. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8391 "2023-09-14T00:27:58Z")
If that’s naptime at this school, I shudder to think about what happens at juice and cookies time. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8392 "2023-09-14T12:52:22Z")
Well done, class! You all get an “A”. And the gold star goes to… > [@Lumpy](#): > > In the East they don’t practice “duck and cover”, they practice “protect your nads”. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8393 "2023-09-14T15:59:42Z")
Continuing with school-inspired themes: [![](https://scoutlife.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/school-feature.jpg?resize=632) ](https://scoutlife.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/school-feature.jpg?resize=632) ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8394 "2023-09-14T16:09:51Z")
And I’ll miss you most of all, my darling, when autumn leaves start to fall. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8395 "2023-09-14T16:12:23Z")
Umbrdige! I’ve got Miss Umbridge! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8396 "2023-09-14T19:56:08Z")
“Help! Billy’s farting again!” ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8397 "2023-09-14T21:12:56Z")
“Jazz hands! JAZZ HANDS!!!” ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8398 "2023-09-14T21:42:02Z")
Proud parent Edward Munch sends his kid off to school. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2023, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8399 "2023-09-14T21:43:34Z")
“It’s a cookbook! Home Ec. 101 is a cookbook!!!” ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2023, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8400 "2023-09-15T00:37:36Z")
Hey, it’s the “Have you seen me” girl! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8401 "2023-09-18T22:06:32Z")
Paging @Lumpy! ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2023, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8402 "2023-09-19T01:07:47Z")
Sorry, I thought I’d done this already! Anyway I’ll give the nod to: > [@Spoons](#): > > “Help! Billy’s farting again!” ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2023, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8403 "2023-09-19T02:29:24Z")
Thanks! Let’s see what you can all do with this: [![](https://static.flickr.com/50/147547713_4688be9126_b.jpg) ](https://static.flickr.com/50/147547713_4688be9126_b.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![iamatractorboy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iamatractorboy/32/21261_2.png) [@iamatractorboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamatractorboy)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2023, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8404 "2023-09-19T06:14:53Z")
Always take care when applying superglue with bare hands. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2023, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8405 "2023-09-19T07:42:31Z")
“Really, Agnes? A dirty spoon? You had one job…” ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2023, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/8406 "2023-09-19T10:55:16Z")
“You missed these squares, darling. They’re completely white.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=419) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=421)