# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 48
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/942 "2020-09-19T03:45:58Z")
Tired of being overruled, Morikami’s body decided to strike out on it’s own. ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/943 "2020-09-19T08:26:38Z")
_“Now that we’re alone I can tell you a secret, bareskin ape. Beware of that guy over there because he wants to rape your furless body.”_ ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/944 "2020-09-19T08:36:22Z")
_"I’ve got the brains, you’ve got the looks,_ _Let’s make lots of money!"_ 🎶 ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 8:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/945 "2020-09-19T08:51:23Z")
_“Okay, I agree with the cryonics procedure but I want my penis frozen too.”_ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/946 "2020-09-19T13:50:44Z")
_I knew I should’ve nailed it on._ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/947 "2020-09-19T13:51:14Z")
_Thanks! Now I can ahead in the world._ ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/948 "2020-09-19T13:53:11Z")
Igawa rejected his new head. He wanted to look more like Hugh Jackman. ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/949 "2020-09-19T14:30:36Z")
_“I did not start this war, but I will finish it.”_ ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/950 "2020-09-19T15:10:04Z")
_“I guess I won’t have to use Head & Shoulders anymore.”_ ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/951 "2020-09-19T18:29:43Z")
“Eekum Bokum!” “Eekum Bokum!” [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/P5MpLQ8TQcQ/maxresdefault.jpg "Eekum Bokum") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5MpLQ8TQcQ) ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2020, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/952 "2020-09-19T19:25:41Z")
“Now _how_ many times have I told you you’d forget your own head if it weren’t attached!?!” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/953 "2020-09-20T04:21:28Z")
> [@PlaceboTarget](#): > > _“Now that we’re alone I can tell you a secret, bareskin ape. Beware of that guy over there because he wants to rape your furless body.”_ That’s our winner! (Sorry, I’m late) ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/954 "2020-09-20T04:29:29Z")
Yay! Thank you, @Elmer_J.Fudd. Now, I think I would love to have a self-referential thread about the pictures and captions in this thread, but in the meantime I will only mention two things: (1) My caption about cryonics is based on the fact that the infamous Jeffrey Epstein wanted to have his head and penis frozen, and (2) My last entry is my favorite - it still makes me laugh. Anyway. Here is the next picture: [![](https://i.imgur.com/XODpx7z.jpg) ](https://i.imgur.com/XODpx7z.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/955 "2020-09-20T04:33:15Z")
You’d think a carpenter could build a better skateboard. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/956 "2020-09-20T05:13:13Z")
“Okay, now watch me glide right over that puddle!” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/957 "2020-09-20T05:16:56Z")
“God, if you’d only caught me the last time I fell, I wouldn’t have to use the training board!” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/958 "2020-09-20T05:19:21Z")
“I don’t know what it is, but I’m getting a bad feeling about this skateboard…” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/959 "2020-09-20T05:40:56Z")
He’s cheating! His feet are nailed to the board! ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/960 "2020-09-20T06:02:17Z")
> [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](#): > > He’s cheating! His feet are nailed to the board!  LOL!!! That was brilliant! ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2020, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/961 "2020-09-20T10:11:48Z")
The holes in his hands gives him an aerodynamic edge. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=47) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=49)