# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 482
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2024, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9627 "2024-05-05T08:08:20Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > “No, no, no! No more! Not this time, Consigliere! No more meetin’s! No more discussions! No more Sollozzo tricks! You give 'em one message - I want Sollozzo. If not, it’s all-out war, we go to the mattresses.” > > Welp, they went to the mattresses. This wins because of the Godfather reference. Take it away @Spoons ! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2024, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9628 "2024-05-05T19:52:32Z")
Thanks! Okay, let’s see what you can do with this one: [![](https://designyoutrust.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/22-27.jpg) ](https://designyoutrust.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/22-27.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Tatterdemalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/43a26b/32.png) [@Tatterdemalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tatterdemalion)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2024, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9629 "2024-05-05T19:55:20Z")
My life with Kristi Noem, by Cricket. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2024, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9630 "2024-05-05T20:16:15Z")
> Detective McPaw just sneered at the boy and snapped, "YOU fetch! > " ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2024, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9631 "2024-05-05T20:17:40Z")
One of Rin Tin Tin’s many tricks was answering his own fan mail. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2024, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9632 "2024-05-05T20:25:19Z")
“I was just doing my job. Please direct any future correspondence to Bull Connor himself.” ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2024, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9633 "2024-05-05T20:53:07Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > 🎶 > _If you’re going to San Francisco,_ > _Be sure to wear sunflowers in your hair …_ > 🎶 (Not in play), @Spoons, I was unfamiliar with that song so I YouTubed it; and while it’s playing my 80-year old brother notices it and is enraptured. He said it was the favorite song of a hippie couple he stayed with for a time in the '60s, and that he hadn’t thought of it or them in literally decades. Thanks for the trip down memory lane. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2024, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9634 "2024-05-06T02:35:06Z")
“Arfarfarfarfarf. Grrrr! Barkbarkbark, arfarf. Woof? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Arafarfarf…” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2024, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9635 "2024-05-06T04:12:30Z")
It’s not the work on the streets that wears out a typical police dog, but the ridiculous amount of paperwork they have to fill out if they actually bite a suspect. ---
**Author:** ![iamatractorboy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iamatractorboy/32/21261_2.png) [@iamatractorboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamatractorboy)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2024, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9636 "2024-05-06T07:21:17Z")
You think this is bad? You should see how much fan mail Lassie replies to! ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2024, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9637 "2024-05-06T17:37:33Z")
The real reason Commander was removed from the White House: he couldn’t keep up with the correspondence. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2024, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9638 "2024-05-06T20:08:45Z")
“Nobody told me I’d have to eat _this_ much homework!” ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9639 "2024-05-07T18:04:07Z")
All work and no play makes Jack a dull dog. All work and no play makes Jack a dull dog. All work and no play… ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9640 "2024-05-07T18:06:53Z")
You bite just ONE mailman, and look what they make you do. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9641 "2024-05-07T18:07:10Z")
All good, but @needscoffee is going to take it for this one: > [@needscoffee](#): > > One of Rin Tin Tin’s many tricks was answering his own fan mail. Take it away, **needscoffee**! ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9642 "2024-05-07T19:50:03Z")
Here you go: [![](https://i.imgur.com/c1n3RZk.png) ](https://i.imgur.com/c1n3RZk.png) ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9643 "2024-05-07T19:56:05Z")
With wimples based on Soviet tanker helmets, they are the Bridezillas of Christ ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9644 "2024-05-07T21:55:58Z")
Gilead Handmaid Academy Graduating Class, 2019. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9645 "2024-05-07T22:07:46Z")
The world is my cloister… ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2024, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/9646 "2024-05-07T22:12:54Z")
The Sister Bertrille School of Flying getting ready for takeoff [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=481) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=483)