# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 19, 2020, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731 "2020-07-19T04:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 70
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1382 "2020-10-14T18:54:25Z")
First place by the barest of margins: > [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](#): > > Little known are the great PirhannaBirds of Africa. They have been known to eat an entire giraffe in under 2 seconds. Second because it made me imagine a giraffe climbing a descending stairway. > [@needscoffee](#): > > M.C. Escher’s African safari vacation slides. Everyone had a contender. This was, by far, the hardest choice. You’re up, @Dr.Winston_OBoogie ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1383 "2020-10-14T19:48:48Z")
Here’s a painting from Louis Wain, [![](https://payload.cargocollective.com/1/0/4579/12141236/1898_LouisWain_TheNaughtyPuss_IllustrationChronicles_1500.jpg) ](https://payload.cargocollective.com/1/0/4579/12141236/1898_LouisWain_TheNaughtyPuss_IllustrationChronicles_1500.jpg) When I was a kid, we had a Time-Life series of books on the Mind. One of them talking about insanity, included [Louis Wain](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louis_Wain) as a case study. As his mind went further from reality, his paintings of cats got more and more abstract. This, obviously, is one of his earlier paintings. ---
**Author:** ![FastDan1](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fastdan1/32/427_2.png) [@FastDan1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FastDan1)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1384 "2020-10-14T20:02:21Z")
Kitten school is not necessarily filled with purrfect cats. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1385 "2020-10-14T20:07:50Z")
Miss Catty can’t abide kittens who’s "c"s look like "r"s. ---
**Author:** ![FastDan1](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fastdan1/32/427_2.png) [@FastDan1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FastDan1)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1386 "2020-10-14T20:10:00Z")
Miss Catty always said, “Spare the paw, spoil the litter.” ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1387 "2020-10-14T20:15:39Z")
“Remember proper urination technique! Spray goes on the couch, not the catbox!” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1388 "2020-10-14T21:19:09Z")
_Your catechism was a catastrophe!_ ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1389 "2020-10-14T23:11:29Z")
Not what I expected when I Googled “Julie Newmar Erotica”. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2020, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1390 "2020-10-14T23:24:48Z")
_After viewing a disturbing scene in the One-Room Schoolhouse of Lost Souls, Dr. Moreau reflected that perhaps he’d been conducting too many cat-centered experiments, and should branch out some._ ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1391 "2020-10-15T00:36:40Z")
Despite her drastic measures, the class refused to reveal where they’d hidden Miss Catty’s catnip. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1392 "2020-10-15T00:53:28Z")
About to be discovered after his bookbag spills open and evidence reveals a secret identity among the pupils, _Mystery Cat of the Future_ sends an emergency retrieval directive from his iPad to the time machine. . . . [zooming in on the picture is necessary] ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1393 "2020-10-15T01:18:25Z")
'Sandbox" in Kittengarden is entirely different than the human version. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1394 "2020-10-15T03:54:05Z")
“Man, if Miss Catty could play jazz saxophone, she’d be one school cat.” ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1395 "2020-10-15T05:12:05Z")
_Not everybody wants to be a cat_. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1396 "2020-10-15T05:43:24Z")
If my math is correct, Miss Catty is 1/6th of a chicken. ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1397 "2020-10-15T05:54:50Z")
_Bandit came within a whisker of getting away with it._ ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1398 "2020-10-15T06:04:55Z")
_In the Feline Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry acquiring nine lives was a damned serious business._ ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1399 "2020-10-15T07:43:27Z")
_What is a cat that leads a dog’s life?_ ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1400 "2020-10-15T07:44:58Z")
_In Cattyland, everybody has not choice but to kick the cat._ ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2020, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731/1401 "2020-10-15T08:16:56Z")
_The spanking of cats is a difficult matter,_ _Such a cat isn’t one of your schoolcat trolls,_ _You may think at first I’m as mad as a hatter,_ _When I tell you that cat has three different goals._ _First of all, there’s the goal that the cat needs daily,_ _Such as food, and water, and a clean litter box,_ _These are the things the cat accepts gayly,_ _But he’ll be punished for skipping the teacher’s dull talks…_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=69) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-1/915731.md?page=71)