# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 2) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 4, 2024, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717 "2024-07-04T12:49:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 176
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2025, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3501 "2025-08-14T18:09:50Z")
That day Tina stepped in a puddle of salmon schmear at the bagel shop. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2025, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3502 "2025-08-14T18:21:36Z")
After Mary was told she wasn’t allowed to bring her lamb to school anymore, she decided to raise the stakes. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2025, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3503 "2025-08-14T19:10:48Z")
It might be August, but it’s always a March of the Penguins. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2025, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3504 "2025-08-14T19:42:42Z")
“Hey little human, got any herring?” ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3505 "2025-08-17T00:47:02Z")
“We’re just two blocks away from the docks, but right now on your left you’ll see the Fin & Grape, a restaurant noted for it’s sea trout and codfish specialties.” ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3506 "2025-08-17T00:50:34Z")
Okay, to wrap this up: > [@running\_coach](#): > > The Gotham City Police were totally unaware the The Penguin had a daughter. Run with it @running_coach ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3507 "2025-08-17T01:08:37Z")
Thanks! [![](https://www.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/DJAhzhKTqj9-png__700.jpg) ](https://www.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/DJAhzhKTqj9-png__700.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3508 "2025-08-17T01:16:21Z")
Yep. Viagra helps get it up. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3509 "2025-08-17T01:46:00Z")
Well, **Spoons** , that’s just about perfect. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3510 "2025-08-17T02:49:05Z")
Agreed. @running_coach you can call this one early. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3511 "2025-08-17T02:59:32Z")
I’d agree it’s a straight-up win but the morning would be better to see what might come up overnight. The rest of you, you need to rise to the occasion. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3512 "2025-08-17T03:18:28Z")
If it doesn’t come down within 4 hours, seek mechanical help. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3513 "2025-08-17T03:29:12Z")
It can be hard to judge the height of an erection when you’ve overinflated your rubber. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3514 "2025-08-17T03:39:28Z")
DOT investigators discovered that the driver had filched from his cargo and mistook his stick shift ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3515 "2025-08-17T03:44:28Z")
Luckily he didn’t hit that sewage line and commit sodomy. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3516 "2025-08-17T03:52:41Z")
Hydraulic fluid all over the place, but the underpass kept a box of Kleenex just for that. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3517 "2025-08-17T04:13:25Z")
“If he’d just admit to cheating I could deal with it. But he has to blame it on swerving to avoid an armadillo.” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3518 "2025-08-17T04:39:22Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > If it doesn’t come down within 4 hours, seek mechanical help Slight rewording: “Okay, it’s been up for 4 hours! _Now_ can I call for mechanical help???” ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3519 "2025-08-17T04:46:26Z")
There’s no hiding this boner. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2025, 11:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/3520 "2025-08-17T11:15:29Z")
See? A whole orgy of posting. This is why I didn’t want to suffer from premature qualification. @needscoffee comes across with: > [@needscoffee](#): > > If it doesn’t come down within 4 hours, seek mechanical help. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717.md?page=175) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717.md?page=177)