# A Genuine Caption Contest (Part 2) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 4, 2024, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717 "2024-07-04T12:49:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 206
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2025, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4101 "2025-11-19T05:22:42Z")
“Only _five_ beatings at a time, folks! Her mother here is now wondering if it was her _other_ daughter who’s the trollop!” ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2025, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4102 "2025-11-19T06:29:47Z")
“You get the pitchforks! You get the torches! And you—get a film crew over here! We can sell this to Universal for their next monster movie!” ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2025, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4103 "2025-11-19T08:04:49Z")
“It was a horse!” “It was a mule!” ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2025, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4104 "2025-11-19T10:19:32Z")
Karen forgot that she time-traveled to the 19th century… and learned the hard way that in 1840, the customer wasn’t just not always right — sometimes she was the local sacrifice. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2025, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4105 "2025-11-19T19:30:20Z")
“We want our money back! We said we wanted rain, and all you’ve gotten us is a few measly clouds!” ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2025, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4106 "2025-11-19T21:27:43Z")
“No headdress? Lacey overgarments? It’s the FALL OF CIVILIZATION!” ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2025, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4107 "2025-11-20T00:50:38Z")
Win to @Ferris (although props must still go to @Kent_Clark for the shande rhyme) ---
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2025, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4108 "2025-11-20T20:00:24Z")
@Slithy_Tove Thanks very much. [![](https://keyassets.timeincuk.net/inspirewp/live/wp-content/uploads/sites/21/2015/02/SCA_141105_halloran_G0092941.jpg) ](https://keyassets.timeincuk.net/inspirewp/live/wp-content/uploads/sites/21/2015/02/SCA_141105_halloran_G0092941.jpg) [Aside] Does anyone have any tips for finding suitable images? I usually struggle to find pics that aren’t licensed and have a linkable address. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2025, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4109 "2025-11-20T20:35:29Z")
"This is the Captain! All Hands! Abandon ship! Ab— " ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2025, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4110 "2025-11-20T21:06:34Z")
> [@Ferris](#): > > I usually struggle to find pics that aren’t licensed and have a linkable address. Not in play: I usually take a screenshot of a picture and upload it to Imgur because I’ll see a pic in a FB post or someplace else where I’ll never find it again. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2025, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4111 "2025-11-20T21:12:22Z")
“Paris, France? I thought we were going to Paris, Texas!” ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2025, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4112 "2025-11-21T01:33:59Z")
Carnival Cruise Lines’ seldom-mentioned Seaman’s Experience voyages. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2025, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4113 "2025-11-21T02:52:03Z")
He saw God’s foot upon the treadle of the loom, and spoke it; and therefore his shipmates called him mad. Proving that men would rather sail around the Horn than go to therapy. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2025, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4114 "2025-11-21T16:03:46Z")
What happens when canister sealants go to the lowest bidder. ---
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2025, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4115 "2025-11-22T00:23:26Z")
> [@Kent\_Clark](#): > > Carnival Cruise Lines’ seldom-mentioned Seaman’s Experience voyages. I did think there might’ve been an entry along the lines of “_Ah-chooo!_” but I’ll give it to @Kent_Clark since I’ve occasionally browsed cruise holiday brochures but never chosen one. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2025, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4116 "2025-11-22T01:54:08Z")
Thanks, @Ferris It’s time to talk turkey. [![](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/10/07/11/34089536-8814145-image-a-1_1602065107620.jpg) ](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/10/07/11/34089536-8814145-image-a-1_1602065107620.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2025, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4117 "2025-11-22T02:42:35Z")
Mitch McConnell’s plastic surgeon looks at wattle samples for his client. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2025, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4118 "2025-11-22T04:31:38Z")
“Nope, this one can’t fly either”. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2025, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4119 "2025-11-22T18:57:23Z")
We call him “the Turkey Whisperer.” ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2025, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717/4120 "2025-11-23T03:19:53Z")
Short, sweet and to the point. You’re up @Lumpy > [@Lumpy](#): > > “Nope, this one can’t fly either”. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717.md?page=205) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-genuine-caption-contest-part-2/1003717.md?page=207)