# A girl is about to lose her virginity to a preacher's nephew **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 3, 2004, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090 "2004-08-03T04:14:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2004, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/41 "2004-08-03T23:13:58Z")
> [@Gamaliel](#): > > Does she have a cell phone? Call her that evening repeatedly. Not so often as to make her turn off the phone, but often enough to spoil the mood. > > Show up with a pizza and plop yourself down in between them. “I have all this pie and no one to share it with… Hey, you’re watching _My Giant_, I love that movie!” > > Or just bring your shotgun. Cock Blocker!! Geez, if she wants to stay a virgin until she is married, then what the hell is the big deal about the boy’s intentions. It’s still her choice. If he tries to fuck her, then she will decline. If he persists, she will leave. Big freaking deal. Or maybe she will decide that she wants to have sex with him. Well, that’s her call. Do you think this boy is dangerous? You have a crush on her, don’t you? ---
**Author:** ![badbadrubberpiggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@badbadrubberpiggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badbadrubberpiggy)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2004, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/42 "2004-08-03T23:50:21Z")
I still don’t think you’re giving her enough credit. I mean, despite that it wasn’t my choice, it is a pretty strong choice to remain a virgin until marriage, and I’m sure it takes a lot of will power to maintain that decision. I doubt one night with this guy is going to suddenly change her mind. He may be a smooth talker, but you could give her some credit for being able to recognize this. Give her some credit for being able to maybe see right through it, or at least just saying NO if he gets too physical. ---
**Author:** ![Gadfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gadfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gadfly)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/43 "2004-08-04T01:00:35Z")
> [@START](#): > > _I’m just putting myself in his \* position and I know what would be going through my mind_\*, that’s why I try not to get in a position like that… What the hell? So, you assume that because you would want to smooth-talk her into undesired sex (or at least think about it)… That he does? > [@](#): > > she can do what she wants but I hope that she does it safely. > [@](#): > > She said they will be alone but that he respects her and know that she wants to stay a virgin until she is married…I can’t believe she could be so naive. Uhh… Alright then. I’m definitely envisioning a simple apartment decorated with owl posters, yeah. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/44 "2004-08-04T04:43:02Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > How old is this girl? I ask again… ---
**Author:** ![AwSnappity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a3d4f5/32.png) [@AwSnappity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AwSnappity)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/45 "2004-08-04T04:52:42Z")
So…the question on everyone’s minds… _Did they do it???_ (For all of you who’ve seen that Dana Carvey Critic’s Choice standup routine, you can imagine exactly the voice I’m using in my head.) ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/46 "2004-08-04T05:22:28Z")
Well, START, I actually think it’s good that you’re concerned about this girl. There is so much NEGATIVE peer pressure nowadays, pushing kids towards the idea of having sex before they’re ready for it…it would actually be good if more kids were of the opposite mindset like you seem to be. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/47 "2004-08-04T05:25:33Z")
> [@Gadfly](#): > > Uhh… Alright then. I’m definitely envisioning a simple apartment decorated with owl posters, yeah. 😕 Also, I just now noticed: The title of this thread reads like the synopsis of a Skinemax movie. ---
**Author:** ![1010011010](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/ea666f/32.png) [@1010011010](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/1010011010)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/48 "2004-08-04T07:38:07Z")
Tonight has become last night, and allow me to join **AwSnappity** in asking for an update of what went down. So, how’d it go? ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/49 "2004-08-04T11:00:11Z")
> [@START](#): > > I’m just saying that’s a hell of a position for a girl to put her self in that wants to keep her virginity…all alone with a smooth talking guy… That’s pretty common in dating life, to be alone with the other person. > [@START](#): > > also girls can’t be to different from guys because I could say how much I want to remain a virgin or whatever and if a girl that I liked was smooth talking me and we were alone, well then you know what would happen 😉 . Then that means that no, you didn’t **really** want to stay a virgin. Thought it was a good idea, maybe, or that it sounded good to reassure your parents with, or something like that. But contrary to the popular belief, people’s brains do have control over their sex drives - they just have to use them at the time instead of copping out behind excuses about how they just “couldn’t resist.” It’s a convenient but false excuse when you talk about the “heat of the moment” or “I had a few drinks, I wouldn’t have wanted to otherwise” or whatever. ---
**Author:** ![START](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@START](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/START)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/50 "2004-08-04T18:59:07Z")
I already have been pitted for starting this thread in the first place, what the heck here is the update. The conversation we had not to long ago, paraphrased somewhat of course. Her: “START” promise not to tell anybody, not even my sister? Me: What is it? Her: Last night…Oh my God “START” I trust you do not tell anybody, you have to swear…Me and “Blank”… I’m not a virgin anymore, you cannot tell anybody. Me: Ok Except your mom right? Her: NO! I’m not playing, please I trust you. Me: Your on a speaker phone Her: What!!?? Me: Just Kidding. Her: Don’t do that to me. Me: I can’t tell your mom, only your sister? Her: Not my sister Me: Just your mom then? Her: Not my mom or my sister. Me: You want me to tell both? Her: I promise I will kill you “START” Me: Ok I’m just playing with you, I would never tell…are you going out with him now? Her: Probably not, I doubt it, I will tell you later but let’s just say he’s not…No we won’t be dating. The conversation continued after that and the only reason I was joking with her is because she is that type of person and by the end of the call she thanked me for talking to her, so I did nothing wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Gadfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gadfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gadfly)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/51 "2004-08-04T19:12:15Z")
> [@Rilchiam](#): > > 😕 [And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.](http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=03222004) ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/52 "2004-08-04T20:46:47Z")
> [@START](#): > > so I did nothing wrong. Other than starting a thread on a matter she wants kept private. Yes, the risk of other Dopers tracking her down is negligible. But how many of your friends and relatives know that you post on the SDMB as START? Does this thread contain enough details for them to figure out the identities of the boy and girl involved? ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/53 "2004-08-04T20:56:38Z")
> [@START](#): > > I already have been pitted for starting this thread in the first place, what the heck here is the update. The conversation we had not to long ago, paraphrased somewhat of course. > > Her: “START” promise not to tell anybody, not even my sister? > > Me: What is it? > > Her: Last night…Oh my God “START” I trust you do not tell anybody, you have to swear…Me and “Blank”… I’m not a virgin anymore, you cannot tell anybody. > > Me: Ok Except your mom right? > > Her: NO! I’m not playing, please I trust you. > > Me: Your on a speaker phone > . So apparently she liked it enough not to complain about it but also found that he’s not dating material. On one hand, you were being quite the drama queen about it, but on the other hand, I’d have been the same way when I was your age. And kudos on the fine Ali G impression! ---
**Author:** ![badbadrubberpiggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@badbadrubberpiggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badbadrubberpiggy)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/54 "2004-08-04T20:58:27Z")
Apparently, she didn’t want to remain a virgin very much. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/55 "2004-08-04T21:41:06Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > I ask again… One more time- **START** **HOW OLD IS SHE???** ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2004, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/56 "2004-08-04T21:48:52Z")
So, 3 possibilities: 1. Date rape (not too likely is my impression) 2. She didn’t want to remain a virgin, but doesn’t want to say so 3. She’s a remarkably weak-minded young woman. Holy cow. People who actually do want to wait usually also don’t kiss on the first date, much less fall into bed accidentally on purpose on that first date. What’s the betting that they didn’t use birth control, and she’s going to call START up 6-10 weeks from now hyperventilating about missing her period, and she’s always been rilly pro-life 'cause killing babies is bad, but she needs an abortion 'cause nobody can know she’s had sex, and it’s START’s job to take her to the clinic and never tell anyone? I’m sorry if you take offense to this, START, but I have little respect for someone who talks the talk without even _trying_ to walk the walk. I take it all back if he forced her. ---
**Author:** ![START](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@START](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/START)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2004, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/57 "2004-08-05T00:50:29Z")
Can’t have Dr. Deth questioning my reading comprehension…the girl is 16. As far as people knowing I post on the SDMB as START…no. Not even the guy who used his credit card for me knows or even cares that I post threads under the name START all he cared about was me giving him the cash. I try to be very vague about certain details of my life, especially where I go to school and what city I live in. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2004, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/58 "2004-08-05T02:42:29Z")
Damn- 16. :smack: I say that because a couple years younger and I would strongly recommend that you at least tell her parents if not the Police- promise or no. A couple years older, and I’d say to “Mind your own business”. :dubious: But 16 is a tough age- some 16yo’s are mature, others are very childlike. Eh. Do what you think is right. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![START](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@START](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/START)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2004, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/59 "2004-08-05T03:41:44Z")
I was right, the evening had nothing to do with watching movies and now she feels bad for giving in but what can I say hormones can be stronger than brain cells sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2004, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090/60 "2004-08-05T03:59:29Z")
Only when the brain cells are weak to begin with. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-girl-is-about-to-lose-her-virginity-to-a-preachers-nephew/258090.md?page=2)