# "A good crap is better than bad sex"?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [May 10, 2003, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268 "2003-05-10T04:10:25Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@samarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samarm)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/1 "2003-05-10T04:10:25Z")
A friend made a strange comment to me recently. He said “A good crap is better than bad sex”. I’ve been thinking about this, and I’m just not sure if it makes sense.
Is there anything _that_ satisfying about “dropping the kids off at the pool”? More satisfying than an embarrassing fumble in the dark?
What would you prefer?
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### Author:  [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/2 "2003-05-10T04:17:01Z")
> [@](#):
>
> “dropping the kids off at the pool”?
Try - “dropping one extremely long, fat kid off at the pool”
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### Author:  [@modro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/modro)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/3 "2003-05-10T04:18:08Z")
Let me tell you, after eating a sausage egg and cheese muffin at McDonalds, in which the grease renders my poop chute a veritable luge, drinking coffee (which always loosens me up) then walking home 2 miles the other day, about to explode during those last 3 or 4 blocks…
I can definitely concur!
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### Author:  [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/4 "2003-05-10T04:52:35Z")
I’d have to agree with your friend too. Sometimes a nice healthy dump can be a touch of heaven.
Thinking about it makes me almost wish I had to go right now.
Happy
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### Author:  [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/5 "2003-05-10T05:05:27Z")
Is gay sex like having a good crap?
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### Author:  [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/6 "2003-05-10T05:07:30Z")
Only if ya get piss shiver.
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### Author:  [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/7 "2003-05-10T05:18:02Z")
Off topic, but not by much:
A former room-mate, after delivering a particularly loud and satisfying sneeze, made the comment “Damn! That was better than 90% of all the sex I’ve ever had. . . and easier to get than 100%!”
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### Author:  [@Daoloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daoloth)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/8 "2003-05-10T05:22:29Z")
If one’s bowel movements are superior to sex, then I wonder with worry what type of sex has been going on.
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### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/9 "2003-05-10T07:31:41Z")
Considering one of my sex partner’s was able to so screw with my head, that I lost my interest in women for some time (thankfully, it returned), I’d have to agree that “a good crap is better than bad sex.”
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### Author:  [@JavaMaven1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JavaMaven1)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 7:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/10 "2003-05-10T07:32:03Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Daoloth \*
> \*\*If one’s bowel movements are superior to sex, then I wonder with worry what type of sex has been going on. \*\*
See, the thing is, it’s comparing a very good bowel movement to _bad_ sex. I mean, c’mon, good sex is always going to be _good sex_.
I think we’ve all had some moments in the midst of sex where we were sorta wishing we were somewhere else.
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### Author:  [@Daoloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daoloth)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/11 "2003-05-10T07:34:37Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by JavaMaven1 \*
> \*\*See, the thing is, it’s comparing a very good bowel movement to _bad_ sex. I mean, c’mon, good sex is always going to be _good sex_.
>
> I think we’ve all had some moments in the midst of sex where we were sorta wishing we were somewhere else. \*\*
In my haste to post, I failed in reading the “bad” part of sex.
I should get some sleep.
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### Author:  [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/12 "2003-05-10T09:40:03Z")
Personally, I don’t like crap and sex in the same thought stream.
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### Author:  [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/13 "2003-05-10T10:17:18Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Lobsang \*
> \*\*Is gay sex like having a good crap? \*\*
_No_.
It’s like having sex with someone who already knows how things work, and thus you move together in perfect lubricated harmony.
Then there is the grunting, gasping, groaning… and painting the wall.
And that’s just first base.
😃
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### Author:  [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/14 "2003-05-10T12:27:07Z")
Yeah, I would definitely agree. A good crap - and I mean a really good crap - is one of the most enjoyable things on the planet. Only rivaled by decent sex.
The best is when you take the initial dump, but you can still feel there’s more in you and then you force it out and it keep coming and coming and coming and coming. A good three flusher before you even have to wipe (usually comes after Thanksgiving, Christmas barbecues and other large feasts).
Good times.
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### Author:  [@Comfortably\_Numb\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Comfortably_Numb_1)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/15 "2003-05-10T13:34:56Z")
As the saying goes,
_Sex is like pizza. Even when its bad, its still pretty good._
😃
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### Author:  [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/16 "2003-05-10T13:47:14Z")
There’s such a thing as _bad_ sex?
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Mockingbird \*
> \*\*Then there is the grunting, gasping, groaning… and painting the wall. \*\*
I thought **Kalhoun** said it was called “painting the ceiling”. Maybe gay sex is different in that sense, too.
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### Author:  [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/17 "2003-05-10T15:19:26Z")
What is this “bad sex” of which you speak?
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### Author:  [@MonkeyMensch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMensch)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/18 "2003-05-10T16:23:21Z")
The answer is, of course, yes: a good crap _can_ be better than bad sex. The key lies in knowing just how bad sex can get. I have actaully had bad sex once.
But so far I’m batting .750! 😉
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### Author:  [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/19 "2003-05-10T16:57:48Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by John Carter of Mars \*
> \*\*What is this “bad sex” of which you speak? \*\*
Don’t ask. Actually, there are many, many, many things better than bad sex. I’ve had bad sex.
I will go so far as to say that a top-notch crap is better than mediocre sex. But not better than average sex.
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### Author:  [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)
#### Post date: [May 10, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/20 "2003-05-10T17:30:09Z")
A good crap is a delightful experience. If my arse is happy, I’m happy.
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