# "A good crap is better than bad sex"? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 10, 2003, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268 "2003-05-10T04:10:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/41 "2003-05-12T18:21:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by superstar \* > \*\*This is a tough one!! > The crap needs to be really good. By that i mean the whole thing comes out, nothing left, and you feel 2 pounds lighter. You then feel like skipping and dancing around the place, and you get really hungry, and even your pants feel loser! Then yes, but i can get the same feelings from sex… so it’s 50/50 for me. > The only bummer about sex is that i don’t get the chance to read the paper while i have sex… \*\* Ahh yes, the kind that curls the toilet like a hot fudge sunday. And the kind when you go to wipe, it’s as if you didn’t have to! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2003, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/42 "2003-05-12T21:19:41Z")
I had a spectacularly enjoyable crap earlier today, in fact. I didn’t feel like smoking afterwards, though. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2003, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/43 "2003-05-12T21:40:18Z")
I’m sure it was smoking coming out.🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2003, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/44 "2003-05-12T23:30:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Earl Snake-Hips Tucker \* > \*\*Off topic, but not by much: > > A former room-mate, after delivering a particularly loud and satisfying sneeze, made the comment “Damn! That was better than 90% of all the sex I’ve ever had. . . and easier to get than 100%!” \*\* Sometimes I can induce a sneeze by scratching a certain part of my nose (it usually produces two sneezes for the price of one). I guess you could call it masturbating. **I wank my nose!** ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2003, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/45 "2003-05-12T23:48:37Z")
Another vote for good crap. I don’t see how anyone could even debate this, unless they’ve never truly had _bad_ sex. (I’m not sure why I feel strangely proud for being able to say with certainty that I’ve had truly horrible sex.) ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/46 "2003-05-13T04:49:51Z")
Always bet on a horse that takes a healthy crap on the track just before the race. ---
**Author:** ![Zabali\_Clawbane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecd19e/32.png) [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/47 "2003-05-13T12:33:21Z")
I have to agree. A good crap IS better than bad sex. You don’t feel guilty towards the toilet, you know it doesn’t resent you. You feel so much lighter, and the queasiness you may have had from waiting your turn is gone. However, if you have bad sex, you end up grumpy, and more tense, and somewhat guilty too. You think your lover resents you, and they are often just as irritable as you. It’s worse, if it was good for you, but bad for them, or vice versa too. A good crap brings relief, and you know that no one resents you for doing it. (Except maybe the next person in the room, but air freshener, or incense takes care of that.) ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/48 "2003-05-13T14:04:48Z")
No hugging required afterwards. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/49 "2003-05-13T16:34:34Z")
I disagree. Even if the sex was bad, you should still hug. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2003, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268/50 "2003-05-13T16:41:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Giraffe \* > \*\*I disagree. Even if the sex was bad, you should still hug. \*\* Have you never heard of “Coyote Love”? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-good-crap-is-better-than-bad-sex/174268.md?page=2)