# A little levity please, or make someone smile for a change. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 9, 2002, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-little-levity-please-or-make-someone-smile-for-a-change/108013 "2002-05-09T02:54:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-little-levity-please-or-make-someone-smile-for-a-change/108013/21 "2002-05-11T05:47:22Z")
(I knew I should have checked this thread earlier this evening) > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cjhoworth \* > \*\*(I was going to do this this morning, but ran out of time) > > ::Runs naked through thread. Slips on banana feel and gets a good 3 feet of altitude before falling and landing on no feet. Picks self up, tries to look like she (I?) intended to do that:: > What? You mean there _isn’t_ a hot tub at the end of the thread? Rats!! > ::Checks to see if there are any male Dopers looking:: > > CJ \*\* ::Sprays lemonade out his nose:: ::Applauds. Holds up sign reading “9.8”:: > [@](#): > > _cougarfang_ > _Thinks about streaking through thread_ > > _Looks at all the Dopers who tried_ > > _Creeps discreetly out of thread_ > > _Slips on an unnoticed banana peel anyways and slides right out_ > > YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa… ::Holds up sign reading “7.5”:: ---
**Author:** ![TN\_hippie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/858c86/32.png) [@TN\_hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TN_hippie)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-little-levity-please-or-make-someone-smile-for-a-change/108013/22 "2002-05-11T18:05:55Z")
You are all terrific, but I gotta hand it you, **Caught@Work.** The elevator bit was bloody hilarious. Too bad I didn’t see it when I was still working at a place with an elevator. _A couple of other suggestions:_ Look closely at the permit/inspection certificate and say “This is a fake.” When the person ahead of you pushes a button and asks you “What floor?” …say “Surprise me. I’m just along for the ride.” _Things I’ve actually done just for fun:_ Twice with Jehova’s Witnesses and once with Mormons…when they knock on the door I invite them in. I let them do their little spiel and then we get into a lengthy discussion of spirituality in which I try to convert them to _my_ beliefs. It’s stimulating to me and an excellent waste of their time. Stand with a friend on a sidewalk, pointing to the top of a tall building. _Every_ passerby will look; some actually stop and stare for a minute or two. When I’m on the receiving end of a wrong number, the caller usually says “Is \_\_\_\_\_ there?” or “Who is this?” I always answer: “It depends. Who wants to know?” When I get a telemarketing call, my response varies: 1. “No speak English.” 2. “I’m so glad you called. I have a deal that you cannot afford to pass up. My I have a few minutes of your time?” 3. (if it’s one of those “free vacation” scams) “You know, I’ve just never really wanted to go there.” **or** “Oh, I’ve been there. Lemme tell ya, it ain’t all that.” I met my first girlfriend (at age 13) making prank phone calls. She sounded nice, so I just started chatting with her. We ended up dating for nearly a year. * * * Life is short: make fun of it, TN\*hippie ---
**Author:** ![Zappo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b3f665/32.png) [@Zappo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zappo)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-little-levity-please-or-make-someone-smile-for-a-change/108013/23 "2002-05-11T18:18:10Z")
Then there was the guy who sent a \bon mot\ in to the local paper every Monday for two and a half months. He hoped the editor would like his work and one would end up in the paper, but. . . no pun in ten did! ::rimshot:: Thanks, folks! I’ll be here all week. Try the veal! ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-little-levity-please-or-make-someone-smile-for-a-change/108013/24 "2002-05-12T02:45:20Z")
A friend just e-mail me this: “There probably aren’t many Jewish girls dancing at Radio City Music Hall, but it doesn’t take a Rockette Zionist to figure that one out.” –Gary Hallock ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2002, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-little-levity-please-or-make-someone-smile-for-a-change/108013/25 "2002-05-12T04:31:02Z")
A blonde is rowing a boat in the middle of a wheat field. Another blonde drives up and get out of her car. She hollers to the other blonde, “You know your making all blondes look stupid. And if I knew how to swim, I would come out there and kick your ass!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-little-levity-please-or-make-someone-smile-for-a-change/108013.md?page=1)