# A new atheist's regrets **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 16, 2011, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626 "2011-04-16T17:30:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2011, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/101 "2011-04-20T01:57:11Z")
> [@Meatros](#): > > Came here to ask this. If your church forbid you from studying these things, then yeah, I can see where some resentment would lay. > > Otherwise, why didn’t you look into them? > > I’m an atheist (for a few years now) and religion still fascinates me. I do not consider my time spent reading and studying it a waste. I actually enjoy it more now than I did when I was Christian, but I think it’s a completely different experience. The wasted time is when I tried so hard to reconcile what I’d been taught in church with what I knew to be true about human nature, and what I knew to be true about history. I spent so much time trying to justify beliefs that were honestly just ridiculous. But I was desperate to make it all make sense. And I know I’m no great theologian but I was obsessed and felt like you have to be obsessed to prove to God that you’re worthy. And I wanted to be prepared when challenged. I felt like argument from non-Christians was an assault on my faith sent straight from Satan himself. See? Ridiculous. But I wanted to believe it because I was so desperate for the comfort of knowing someone out there is making sure I’m safe and one day I’d be back with my family again. I feel like that time could have been better spent learning about other things in life, and I know it’s true because I am enjoying it so much more now. And enjoyment is what it’s all about! ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2011, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/102 "2011-04-20T02:09:55Z")
> [@newcrasher](#): > > I am casting apersion upon something that is worthy of casting aspersions upon. One of the main reasons people have such difficulty breaking with the ridiculous beliefs you must maintain to remain a christian is that people feel it needs to be treated so delicately. > > I cast aspersions and I have said why. Take issue with what I said, don’t ask me to just play nice. Ah fuck it. Cast them all you want and screw 'em if they consider it arrogant. Learning is but a series of gathering of information and rejecting what you disagree with. You think it’s a waste of your time to study religion. I think it’s a waste of time to study astrology or Reiki healing. It’s all the same to me. When I first came to this board I was a Creationist Christian. I wasn’t a young earther, but I fully believed Eve ate a piece of fruit from the tree God told her not to, and that’s why we suffer in the world. I actually taught this to my child when she was little, and I made sure she was aware of Hell too. And I regret it more than anything in my life. How is it arrogant to say this was time wasted? I know you said you were more liberal but it sounds like you tried the same thing I tried; to justify what you were told with what you knew to be true and the two were not meshing together. It’s painful and frustrating and you look back and think it really was such a waste, the whole struggle was a waste of time I could have spent dancing or flying a kite or just watching the world. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2011, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/103 "2011-04-20T14:56:21Z")
**newcrasher** , if you are so much smarter than average, why did it take you ten years to figure out that you didn’t believe? Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![newcrasher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b3f665/32.png) [@newcrasher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/newcrasher)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2011, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/104 "2011-04-21T01:58:58Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > **newcrasher** , if you are so much smarter than average, why did it take you ten years to figure out that you didn’t believe? > > Regards, > Shodan There are millions of highly intelligent people at varying and changing stages of belief. You would think that the correlation between intelligence and self awareness would be more distinct. Thanks for the pseudo-insult by the way, but I already clarified the haughty tone of the OP earlier in the thread. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2011, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/105 "2011-04-21T04:17:36Z")
I’m still trying to figure out why I’d want to be living among the stars. It’s cold and generally hostile out there, and we’ve got one hell of an Earth! ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2011, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/106 "2011-04-21T04:43:59Z")
Try considering Jesus not as a divine figure but as an ethicist. The radical pacifism expressed in the phrase “Turn the other cheek” is something that I, an avowed agnostic, have always found moving. The Parable of the Good Samaritan\* is a powerful and dramatic statement of the interconnectedness and interdependency of mankind, truer today than it was when Jesus said it. Yeshua of Nazareth rightly ranks among the great ethicists of all time. Or, if you prefer art to ethics, you’ve got one hell of a command of a beautiful work of poetry and metaphor, one that is probably more influential than any other in our Western society. That’s valuable too. Finally, you’ve probably learned how to thinking deeply and critically about a text, which is likewise a valuable skill. It’s not time wasted. \*And I promise, I like the Bible even outside of the Sermon on the Mount. ---
**Author:** ![Hallucinex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ba9def/32.png) [@Hallucinex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hallucinex)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2011, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/107 "2011-04-21T06:49:43Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > The Parable of the Good Samaritan\* is a powerful and dramatic statement of the interconnectedness and interdependency of mankind, truer today than it was when Jesus said it. [Or just a liiiittle bit racist](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIVB3DdRgqU) 😛 ---
**Author:** ![newcrasher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b3f665/32.png) [@newcrasher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/newcrasher)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2011, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/108 "2011-04-21T11:35:32Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > Try considering Jesus not as a divine figure but as an ethicist. The radical pacifism expressed in the phrase “Turn the other cheek” is something that I, an avowed agnostic, have always found moving. The Parable of the Good Samaritan\* is a powerful and dramatic statement of the interconnectedness and interdependency of mankind, truer today than it was when Jesus said it. Yeshua of Nazareth rightly ranks among the great ethicists of all time. Or, if you prefer art to ethics, you’ve got one hell of a command of a beautiful work of poetry and metaphor, one that is probably more influential than any other in our Western society. That’s valuable too. Finally, you’ve probably learned how to thinking deeply and critically about a text, which is likewise a valuable skill. It’s not time wasted. > > \*And I promise, I like the Bible even outside of the Sermon on the Mount. Agreed and agreed. There are wonderful wisdom stories in the bible and Jesus was a great ergo ethicist. But by acknowledging the Jesus is not divine I can safely say there is a bunch of the bible that is vile. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2011, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/109 "2011-04-22T01:29:51Z")
> [@newcrasher](#): > > Thanks for the pseudo-insult by the way, but I already clarified the haughty tone of the OP earlier in the thread. But you’re still coming across that way. I’m a theist. I do NOT consider myself a “deluded sky-fairy worshipper”, and I’m tired hearing the phrase on this board. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2011, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/110 "2011-04-22T02:02:53Z")
Why, what’s the difference? ---
**Author:** ![newcrasher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b3f665/32.png) [@newcrasher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/newcrasher)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2011, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/111 "2011-04-22T11:23:39Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > But you’re still coming across that way. I’m a theist. I do NOT consider myself a “deluded sky-fairy worshipper”, and I’m tired hearing the phrase on this board. Haughty was when I was saying I was more intelligent than most, something that was silly to say. But if you believe something that goes against all evidence, that qualifies you as deluded. The “sky-fairy” thing was out of line because I don’t know who you worship. You may genuflect before Poseidon, who is obviously a sea-fairy. ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2011, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/112 "2011-04-22T14:27:02Z")
> [@Rushgeekgirl](#): > > I know you said you were more liberal but it sounds like you tried the same thing I tried; to justify what you were told with what you knew to be true and the two were not meshing together. It’s painful and frustrating and you look back and think it really was such a waste, the whole struggle was a waste of time I could have spent dancing or flying a kite or just watching the world. Yes. Exactly. Very well stated. My parents have spent their whole lives doing this: making elaborate attempts to reconcile rational thought with religious indoctrination. Sometimes I feel like the main reason they go to church is that being in that environment helps prevent reason from beating faith in the contest for their beliefs. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2011, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/113 "2011-04-23T03:59:39Z")
> [@newcrasher](#): > > Haughty was when I was saying I was more intelligent than most, something that was silly to say. But if you believe something that goes against all evidence, that qualifies you as deluded. The “sky-fairy” thing was out of line because I don’t know who you worship. You may genuflect before Poseidon, who is obviously a sea-fairy. I don’t really feel that I “worship” a god so much as I just believe in one. You may see me as “deluded”, fine. (It’s more that I feel that there’s something out there, not any one such religion. I consider myself a “vague theist”) But lately I’ve been getting really, REALLY irritated at the “deluded sky-fairy believer” comments that have been going around. Because quite honestly, I’ve never given a shit what people believe, as long as they’re respective for the beliefs, or non-beliefs of others. (You can worship an old sweat-sock, for all I care!) Just as much as atheists hate being told they’re just angry at god, believers hate being told they’re just deluded. You see? Mutual respect for beliefs (or non-beliefs). Religious beliefs are, in my opinion, a very personal thing. Religion isn’t inherantly good or bad. Some people are motivated by it to do good, others to do evil. So for every Jerry Falwell, David Koresh, Osama Bin Laden, you’ll have a Gandhi, an Oscar Romero, or a Marin Luther King. You can’t say that it’s all good or all bad. It just is. And studying religion IS a very useful tool, because it is such a huge influence in our lives – humanity, philosophy, history, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2011, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/114 "2011-04-24T17:32:21Z")
> [@olivesmarch4th](#): > > I think your approach is certainly ideal, and I’ve found that happy place in some ways. There are certain freedoms I definitely enjoy untethered from the idea of religious doctrine. But religion did once play a role in helping me feel comfortable with the unknown. It made me feel safe, protected, loved. The specific part that makes me sad is that buffer no longer exists. There is ambiguity, and pain, and meaninglessness, and we’re pretty much on our own to sort it all out. That’s actually terrifying. > > On a lighter note, now I’m imagining little baby atheists running around. Sounds like you’re not an Atheist. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2011, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/115 "2011-04-25T18:22:19Z")
> [@newcrasher](#): > > In all humility, I am more intelligent than most. I think the majority of Dopers would know what I mean. Cite? Are you smarter than me? Are you sure? I don’t think you are; can you prove it? ---
**Author:** ![newcrasher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b3f665/32.png) [@newcrasher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/newcrasher)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2011, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626/116 "2011-04-25T23:13:07Z")
> [@Winston\_Smith](#): > > Cite? Are you smarter than me? Are you sure? I don’t think you are; can you prove it? Yawn… Read the thread. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-atheists-regrets/578626.md?page=5)