# A new Punch Line thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** comedian-jokes\ **Created:** [April 8, 2020, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364 "2020-04-08T17:58:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 24
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2020, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/461 "2020-07-03T22:31:17Z")
“Marry her.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2020, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/462 "2020-07-04T03:45:56Z")
Now you’re just comparing apples to oranges. ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2020, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/463 "2020-07-04T03:49:27Z")
“How do you think I rang the bell?” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2020, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/464 "2020-07-04T04:04:13Z")
“Does anyone here know who this man is? He seems to have forgotten.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2020, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/465 "2020-07-04T05:13:40Z")
“An old black bag full of drugs, floating in the bathtub.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2020, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/466 "2020-07-05T17:23:47Z")
The “J” is for “Jenius.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2020, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/467 "2020-07-05T17:43:26Z")
“They recycled their combs.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2020, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/468 "2020-07-08T03:29:22Z")
“A fire in a trash can.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2020, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/469 "2020-07-08T04:08:26Z")
“He was in the mood for a little Chinese.” ---
**Author:** ![PlaceboTarget](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/placebotarget/32/1073_2.png) [@PlaceboTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlaceboTarget)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2020, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/470 "2020-07-08T04:14:27Z")
“I told her that Business Class doesn’t stop at Chicago.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2020, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/471 "2020-07-08T09:42:52Z")
“Dead ant! Dead ant! Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant…” “To the dump, to the dump, to the dump, dump, dump…” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2020, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/472 "2020-07-08T13:44:07Z")
One, but it has to _want_ to change. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2020, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/473 "2020-07-08T17:32:00Z")
No, but I got 'em with the door One to change the bulb and 100 to do an environmental impact study one to change the bulb and 10 to ‘share the experience’ one to hold the bulb and two to rotate the ladder ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2020, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/474 "2020-07-08T18:48:50Z")
“No! Gimme a BUD LITE!” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2020, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/475 "2020-07-09T14:26:52Z")
“Well, I have to tell you all, She’s black, and She’s pissed.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2020, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/476 "2020-07-09T15:27:15Z")
“The other psychiatrist says ‘Hmm, I wonder what he meant by that?’” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2020, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/477 "2020-07-09T15:50:03Z")
“Is that _all_?!?” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2020, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/478 "2020-07-09T15:51:05Z")
“Oh, no, Bwana. But you can’t fool dem BoBo flies.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2020, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/479 "2020-07-09T17:15:48Z")
A recovery begins when the President loses _his_ job. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2020, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/480 "2020-07-09T19:31:42Z")
One of its legs is both the same. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364.md?page=23) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364.md?page=25)