# A new Punch Line thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** comedian-jokes\ **Created:** [April 8, 2020, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364 "2020-04-08T17:58:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 34
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2020, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/661 "2020-11-14T05:52:43Z")
“Nobody in here but us chickens!” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2020, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/662 "2020-11-14T15:51:32Z")
“What motherfucker tell you that schmegge?” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2020, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/663 "2020-11-14T16:01:28Z")
“Every December 7th, he attacked Pearl Bailey.” Hadn’t thought of this one in years, and it turned up in another thread today! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2020, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/664 "2020-11-14T21:52:35Z")
“Take it back and bring me the winner!” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2020, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/665 "2020-11-14T21:58:32Z")
“Four in the morning is an odd time. Too early to get up, too late to go back to sleep.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2020, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/666 "2020-11-15T21:14:59Z")
“So I just switched the heads.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2020, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/667 "2020-11-15T21:24:49Z")
“Hit me!” “No!” “Hit me!” “No!” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/668 "2020-11-17T14:55:24Z")
“Good Lord, no! Someone might see us and think we’re _dancing_!” 😮 ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2020, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/669 "2020-11-18T03:12:44Z")
“Please kill me first!” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2020, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/670 "2020-11-20T05:40:08Z")
“The Carpenter.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2020, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/671 "2020-11-21T21:46:20Z")
Mrs. Katz and her lawyer. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2020, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/672 "2020-11-21T21:51:08Z")
“When God spray-paints them, he holds them like _this_.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2020, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/673 "2020-11-23T14:16:52Z")
“He heard it through the car-bine.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2020, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/674 "2020-11-23T14:18:24Z")
Is this a Robert Goulet joke? 🤨 ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2020, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/675 "2020-11-24T20:43:40Z")
“Oh, _why_ did that firetruck have to go by?” 😭 ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2020, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/676 "2020-11-26T04:52:38Z")
“Good morning, Father.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2020, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/677 "2020-11-26T05:06:55Z")
“They don’t have balls to scratch.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2020, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/678 "2020-11-26T21:22:07Z")
“Pretty much like a sheep.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2020, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/679 "2020-11-26T23:33:32Z")
“Okay, let’s go camping then!” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2020, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364/680 "2020-11-28T04:58:24Z")
“Go fetch thy mother.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364.md?page=33) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-new-punch-line-thread/851364.md?page=35)