# A pill a day keeps the baby away! EVERY day, dammit! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 23, 2002, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330 "2002-07-23T03:09:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Annie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/858c86/32.png) [@Annie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/1 "2002-07-23T03:09:37Z")
So I’m rooting around looking for contraceptive info for another thread, and find this [http://www.plannedparenthood.org/bc/7MYTHS.HTM#1](http://www.plannedparenthood.org/bc/7MYTHS.HTM#1) under ‘Myths about the Pill’, discussing failure rates: > [@](#): > > Only 42 percent take the Pill every day. > At least 16 percent have pills left at the end of the month. WHAT??!! How the hell is it that 58 percent of BCP users cannot look at the package, see that pill one in the pack is labelled “Monday” number two is labelled “Tuesday” ad infinitum, and not extrapolate that you should take one on Monday, one on Tuesday, and keep going thus until all the pills are gone and Aunt Flo shows up? Are we making origami with the instruction insert? Was the packaging written in Portugese and sent to Swedish drugstores by accident? Is sexual education in the West really this shitty? Yeah, #3 sounds about right. So for god’s sake, if you use contraception of whatever sort, do some research, use it right, and keep the stork away until you choose to issue him a formal invitation. (hmmm…don’t use whipped cream as a condom lube…no Bag Balm either!?..scribble scribble… ---
**Author:** ![WV\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@WV\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WV_Woman)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/2 "2002-07-23T03:25:58Z")
The only way to keep the stork away is to not do it to begin with. ---
**Author:** ![Juniper200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@Juniper200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Juniper200)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/3 "2002-07-23T03:40:24Z")
When I first went on the pill, the nurse sat down with me and explained the DialPak very slowly and patiently, as though I were a two year old. So I guess there are enough people out there with Fundamental Failure to Get It that medical personell find it necessary to deliver that level of instruction. I used to listen to Loveline pretty frequently, too, and just about every night there would be a girl who called in saying that the pill “hadn’t worked for her” so she’d had to switch to condoms (which she should have been wearing anyway, what with STDs and all). Dr. Drew would always call them out, saying “The pill probably worked just fine for you; you just couldn’t remember to take it, right?” and nine times out of ten, they’d quietly admit that that was the case. Jesus, people! What’s so hard about putting the pills next to the alarm clock or next to your toothbrush so that you see them every day and remember to take them? But this plan presupposes the use of alarm clocks and toothbrushes…I guess you could keep the pills next to the Boone’s Farm or the crack pipe, though. ---
**Author:** ![Annie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/858c86/32.png) [@Annie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/4 "2002-07-23T03:41:39Z")
Well, that does have a 100% success rate at pregnancy prevention but I see one leeeetle flaw in the plan. ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/5 "2002-07-23T03:44:48Z")
I always had pills left over. 😉 The green ones, that were sugar pills, that you took the week you had your period. I just didn’t take 'em. I was able to count to seven and knew to start a new pack of pills the following week. Duh. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Annie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/858c86/32.png) [@Annie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/6 "2002-07-23T03:46:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Juniper200 \* > \*\* > > Jesus, people! What’s so hard about putting the pills next to the alarm clock or next to your toothbrush so that you see them every day and remember to take them? But this plan presupposes the use of alarm clocks and toothbrushes…I guess you could keep the pills next to the Boone’s Farm or the crack pipe, though. \*\* Mine’s next to the toothpaste. I keep losing the crack pipe and Boone’s makes me pee;) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/7 "2002-07-23T04:05:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \* > \*\*The only way to keep the stork away is to not do it to begin with. \*\* No disrespect intended, VW\_Woman, but your theory doesn’t work when your date is holding you down on the couch. Or for married women whose husbands believe “I do” means “I will” at any moment for the rest of their lives. Sex happens, sometimes when you don’t want it to. And no, I don’t want a repeat of **magdalene’s** locked, “Now get off my fucking couch” thread. ---
**Author:** ![Fred](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/db5fbb/32.png) [@Fred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fred)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/8 "2002-07-23T04:19:47Z")
Actually, the only way to keep the stork away is a coat hanger. That, or, a really hard “the-kind-that-killed-Houdini” punch in the lower belly. ---
**Author:** ![Annie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/858c86/32.png) [@Annie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/9 "2002-07-23T04:27:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by the grim spectre of red death \* > \*\*Actually, the only way to keep the stork away is a coat hanger. That, or, a really hard “the-kind-that-killed-Houdini” punch in the lower belly. \*\* If it comes to remedial action, I’d prefer a surgeon and a sterilized treatment room, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Granuaile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecccb3/32.png) [@Granuaile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Granuaile)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/10 "2002-07-23T04:33:56Z")
:smack: I totally forgot, back alley abortions and violent miscarriage are the \*only \*ways to deal with unwanted pregancy. :rolleyes: As someone who has nursed a friend who tried to cause a miscarriage by flinging herself down a flight of stairs… Fuck You. G. ---
**Author:** ![porcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ac91a4/32.png) [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/11 "2002-07-23T04:41:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \* > \*\*The only way to keep the stork away is to not do it to begin with. \*\* I have no interest in doing the stork. Re the OP, so the idjits who habitually forget to take pills counted in the stats on BCP effectiveness? Because that would mean for women who aren’t idjits, the failure rate is considerably less. Every once in a great while I’ve forgotten to take a pill, but I always remember the next morning (or sometimes just a few hours later). Use a back-up method if necessary. It’s really not that difficult. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/12 "2002-07-23T04:48:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \* > \*\*The only way to keep the stork away is to not do it to begin with. \*\* And if your parents knew that, you wouldn’t be here. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/13 "2002-07-23T04:55:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \* > \*\*The only way to keep the stork away is to not do it to begin with. \*\* And if your parents knew that, you wouldn’t be here. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![xyzzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/e36b37/32.png) [@xyzzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xyzzy)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/14 "2002-07-23T04:57:14Z")
One word: CONDOMS. Get the men in your lives to USE the bloody things! It’s his cum, right? Make him take responsibility for it! As for abortions, go ahead and have one if you want. And if anyone has a problem with it, take my advice… Tell the little antichoice arsewits to… GET RAILED! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/15 "2002-07-23T05:22:08Z")
Jesus, what’s so hard about remembering to take pills? I have to take pills every goddamn day of my life. A Ritalin in the morning, one and one half a Paxil in the evening. And I always remember too. Well, sometimes I forget the Ritalin-it’s not as important. But dammit, I take my Paxil every fucking night. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/16 "2002-07-23T05:27:55Z")
My wife and I have the perfect system - I always go to sleep after her, so I’m responsible that she take the pill. I nudge her awake, put the pill in her mouth, bring her a glass of water and tuck her back to sleep. If I forget… well, no nookie until next month. The way she sees it, she’s the one in our relationship who’s stuck with the complicated reproductive system, so the least I can do is shoulder some of the responsibility. ---
**Author:** ![Scorpio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Scorpio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scorpio)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/17 "2002-07-23T06:03:58Z")
> [@](#): > > If I forget… well, no nookie until next month. I bet you make darn sure you don’t forget! ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/18 "2002-07-23T06:06:45Z")
**Alessan** : Do you know the Heimlich maneuver? Because putting a pill and water in the mouth of someone who is mostly asleep and in a reclining position is a great way to start them choking. Much better to get her in a seated position. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/19 "2002-07-23T06:07:49Z")
Most statistics on birth control effectiveness have two columns, one for perfect usage and one for real-world usage. This accounts for people who forget to take their birth control pill sometimes, or put the condom on backwards, or whatever. **xyzzy** : Condoms aren’t foolproof either. Whatsit Jr. is living proof of this. If you REALLY REALLY don’t want to get pregnant, you should use at least two forms of birth control. If you REALLY REALLY REALLY don’t want to get pregnant, you shouldn’t have sex. No method is perfect. ---
**Author:** ![spathiphyllum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6f9a4e/32.png) [@spathiphyllum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spathiphyllum)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330/20 "2002-07-23T06:23:55Z")
If you’re the type of person who forgets to take medication, why not just try one of the other hormonal b/c options that only have to be remembered every few weeks? I can kind of understand if someone is very squeamish they might not want to do the Lunelle or Depo Provera shots, but with things like the [Ortho Evra skin patch](http://www.orthoevra.com/faqs/faqs.html), and [the NuvaRing](http://www.nuvaring.com) now becoming available which were invented with women who forget the pill in mind, this really should be an increasingly obsolete problem. As for the abortion comments in this thread, I don’t know what abortion has to do with this issue, since obviously there are ways to avoid pregnancy that are not being used to their full potential. A significant number of aborting women weren’t using birth control at all (about 42% according to Alan Guttmacher Institute), and of those who do use birth control, this thread indicates many do not use it correctly. These types of problems can be remedied without abortion. “Anti-choice arsewits” should “get railed”, X? Wow, that was profound. I have no idea why the abortion debate has dragged on for decades when people like you obviously have all the answers. Yes, you discovered the big secret. We pro-lifers are all really anti-choice, because obviously anyone who happens to disagree with your personal view must be a monster. And, gosh, it’s hard to see why anyone would ever have a problem with abortion. After all, nobody could possibly see any value in the life of a fetus unless they’re REALLY just looking for a way to torture and oppress women–that’s why nobody ever feels bad about having a miscarriage or stillbirth. :rolleyes: [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pill-a-day-keeps-the-baby-away-every-day-dammit/120330.md?page=2)