# A pitting of stupid job applicants. The economy is in the toilet - quit being so dumb. (lame) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 3, 2011, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180 "2011-06-03T10:19:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/81 "2011-06-03T17:41:06Z")
Yeah, there is some dumbness out there. I review resumes for certain positions at my company and I’ve seen some really horrid resumes. Some who, when applying for a position at our insurance agency, have objectives like, “I would like to own my own television sation someday.” I think my favorite was the one [del]that was written in strike through from top to bottom.[/del] As much as I just toss them aside and don’t really think much of it later, sometimes I will see one and not be so confused as to why that particular person is currently unemployed. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/82 "2011-06-03T17:45:26Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > The Executive Assistants school my parents wanted me to attend was a 3-year program and you came out business-fluent in at least two foreign languages (if you already passed one of the three they offered, you got to study the other two; if you passed two, they taught you the other one and sent you to the local official language school for another), with a good knowledge of labor laws, accounting, etc. I don’t remember the details, as it’s been 20 years, but it definitely went waaaaay beyond what your average “filing temp” needs (and I’ve been one, and done data entry, and been a receptionist, but it wasn’t in places where you were likely to need your mad German-speaking skillz). This would probably be a bit of overkill, but my friend really would like to get someone who can be a bit more than a file clerk. He’s hop g to get someone to manage his calendar electronically which he doesn’t currently have or know how to use so they would have to be able to teach him, handle travel, prepaid correspondenc for auditors and Revinue Canada etc a d what not. I think he’s perfectly happy to train someone for that type of thing if they dont know the lingo, but he’s hoping not to have someone who doesn’t even know an appropriate way to answer the phone. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/83 "2011-06-03T17:52:31Z")
That’s a pretty amazing skill – managing a calendar that doesn’t exist. Mayan? ---
**Author:** ![Das\_Glasperlenspiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/das_glasperlenspiel/32/2944_2.png) [@Das\_Glasperlenspiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Das_Glasperlenspiel)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/84 "2011-06-03T17:59:08Z")
Where’s “local”? Over 20 years experience, computer-literate, cat-herder extraordinaire, able to deal with the public . . . will submit resumé on request! ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/85 "2011-06-03T19:41:56Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > That’s a pretty amazing skill – managing a calendar that doesn’t exist. Mayan? Indeed! No - it means he currently scribbles things on sticky notes and would like to use outlook instead! ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/86 "2011-06-03T19:42:56Z")
> [@Das\_Glasperlenspiel](#): > > Where’s “local”? Over 20 years experience, computer-literate, cat-herder extraordinaire, able to deal with the public . . . will submit resumé on request! Calgary ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/87 "2011-06-03T19:53:11Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > I _knew_ this was going to go well! [**Argent** ’s Edict?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=13857524&postcount=4) > [@Ogre](#): > > Metal rape week would be the perfect storm. I’d shake its hand. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/88 "2011-06-03T20:40:04Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > On a different note, if you were applying for this job and got it, what would you use the flexible spending account for? Clothing? Is it really that out there for me to think that most guys might want to do something else with the money? When I got my first office job, I spent a bunch on clothing, because my entire wardrobe was t-shirts, jeans and an interview suit. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/89 "2011-06-03T20:45:26Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > When I got my first office job, I spent a bunch on clothing, because my entire wardrobe was t-shirts, jeans and an interview suit. Huh - well there you go. I just didn’t imagine guys would like the clothing thing. Oh well, they could choose that if they wanted. ---
**Author:** ![Frau\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ccd318/32.png) [@Frau\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frau_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/90 "2011-06-03T22:19:34Z")
If only those pesky laws didn’t prevent you from including in your job posting the super secret but actual criteria: “Ideal candidate will have a vagina, and be under 24 or over 56.” Too bad, huh? It would make that losers-who-have-no-business-applying applicant pool far less exhausting to wade through. Plus, an upfront display of such a telling business practice would discourage those under-24 and over-56 vagina-sporters who “wouldn’t fit into the company culture” from applying. ---
**Author:** ![EmAnJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@EmAnJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmAnJ)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/91 "2011-06-03T22:21:16Z")
Man, this job would have been perfect for me 10 years ago when I had just graduated from my ‘Advanced Business Technology’ certificate program. Yup, I did the secretarial / admin training. It was two years, and a good base for that type of work, especially if you’re just out of high school. And FYI, I’m local, and most, if not all, of these types of ad’s in Calgary specify secritarial training or equivilent training. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/92 "2011-06-03T22:32:33Z")
You guys are killing me with all the typos in your posts talking about other people’s unacceptable secretarial skills. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/93 "2011-06-03T22:38:17Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > You guys are killing me with all the typos in your posts talking about other people’s unacceptable secretarial skills. 😃 Good thing I have my own secretary! ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/94 "2011-06-03T22:39:20Z")
> [@Frau\_Blucher](#): > > If only those pesky laws didn’t prevent you from including in your job posting the super secret but actual criteria: “Ideal candidate will have a vagina, and be under 24 or over 56.” > > Too bad, huh? It would make that losers-who-have-no-business-applying applicant pool far less exhausting to wade through. > > Plus, an upfront display of such a telling business practice would discourage those under-24 and over-56 vagina-sporters who “wouldn’t fit into the company culture” from applying. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Cort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/77aa72/32.png) [@Cort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cort)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/95 "2011-06-03T23:04:46Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > And so we’re clear - I reviewed _ALL_ of the applications. If you get no reply back, it’s because you’re application sucked and you wasted my time. I will not be wasting more of it to tell you so. Apologies if this has already been asked, but since this is a companion to [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=610736) thread, in which you are also participating, I’d like to ask if you included the words ‘Unsuccessful applicants will not be contacted’ in your job advertisement and, if not, why not? ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/97 "2011-06-03T23:17:00Z")
> [@Cort](#): > > Apologies if this has already been asked, but since this is a companion to [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=610736) thread, in which you are also participating, I’d like to ask if you included the words ‘Unsuccessful applicants will not be contacted’ in your job advertisement and, if not, why not? I don’t think I was participating in that thread, but I guess I might have posted and forgot and now can’t find it. Anyhow, regarding the question, I dunno - I always thought the convention was only to contact people who had been interviewed - I suppose if it will help I can mention to my friend to add it to the next one. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/98 "2011-06-03T23:20:15Z")
> [@veronika](#): > > thnx for sharing great article buy why have not another languages support to here Happy to help. 😕😕😕 ---
**Author:** ![Cort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/77aa72/32.png) [@Cort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cort)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/99 "2011-06-03T23:32:13Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > I don’t think I was participating in that thread, but I guess I might have posted and forgot and now can’t find it. > > Anyhow, regarding the question, I dunno - I always thought the convention was only to contact people who had been interviewed - I suppose if it will help I can mention to my friend to add it to the next one. I think it would be a good idea. It would help applicants keep track of those companies they need to chase up. I may be in the minority, but I have a personal policy of telephoning companies which don’t respond to my applications. This is ostensibly because I want to make sure they received my letter/didn’t accidentally delete my e-mail, but mainly because I just really hate being ignored. Also, if it so happens that my application is still being considered, a brief, polite phone call will give me a chance to make a fleeting personal contact with the HR representative who is working through the CV’s, thereby demonstrating to a key individual within the company that I really am enthusiastic about the position, and consequently helping me to stand out in her mind. So as you can see, I’ve got plenty of incentive to call if I don’t receive a response to my application. If, however, you’ve included a disclaimer to the effect that unsuccessful applicants will not be contacted, then I can happily cross you off my list knowing that such a phonecall will do more harm than good. In the end, it saves time for everyone. Sorry to go on, but it’s a pet peeve of mine 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/100 "2011-06-03T23:39:19Z")
> [@Cort](#): > > I think it would be a good idea. It would help applicants keep track of those companies they need to chase up. I may be in the minority, but I have a personal policy of telephoning companies which don’t respond to my applications. This is ostensibly because I want to make sure they received my letter/didn’t accidentally delete my e-mail, but mainly because I just really hate being ignored. Also, if it so happens that my application is still being considered, a brief, polite phone call will give me a chance to make a fleeting personal contact with the HR representative who is working through the CV’s, thereby demonstrating to a key individual within the company that I really am enthusiastic about the position, and consequently helping me to stand out in her mind. So as you can see, I’ve got plenty of incentive to call if I don’t receive a response to my application. If, however, you’ve included a disclaimer to the effect that unsuccessful applicants will not be contacted, then I can happily cross you off my list knowing that such a phonecall will do more harm than good. In the end, it saves time for everyone. Sorry to go on, but it’s a pet peeve of mine 🙂 Fair enough - I’ll tell him to add it in. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Steophan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steophan/32/9595_2.png) [@Steophan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steophan)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2011, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180/101 "2011-06-03T23:49:28Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > On a different note, if you were applying for this job and got it, what would you use the flexible spending account for? Clothing? Is it really that out there for me to think that most guys might want to do something else with the money? In the unlikely event I got an admin job, a clothing allowance would be helpful. I doubt ripped jeans and black metal t-shirts are what you’d hope I’d wear. > [@Ogre](#): > > Metal rape week would be the perfect storm. Must resist temptation to link to Cannibal Corpse songs… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-pitting-of-stupid-job-applicants-the-economy-is-in-the-toilet-quit-being-so-dumb-lame/584180.md?page=6)