# A salad Howl **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 19, 2003, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568 "2003-01-19T01:49:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/21 "2003-01-19T05:41:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*What happens if you eat salad dressing that’s past date? \*\* You live to vinegrette it. ---
**Author:** ![Trucido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@Trucido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trucido)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/22 "2003-01-19T05:47:38Z")
And all the kitchens echoed And all the kitchens echoed And all the kitchens echoed And all the kitchens echoed… ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/23 "2003-01-19T05:50:03Z")
The dressing was off. But the lettuce was not put Into the freezer. Like I did, somehow, last week. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/24 "2003-01-19T05:55:34Z")
Anything that isn’t growing fur in my fridge is considered edible. That principle has worked for years, and I’m not dead yet. ---
**Author:** ![austen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b2d939/32.png) [@austen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/austen)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/25 "2003-01-19T08:53:35Z")
A salad dressing- Past it’s prime, surely, but, oh! How it was wanted! ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/26 "2003-01-19T09:10:34Z")
**Fenris** , thank you for brightening my evening. It’s too rare I get a dose of beat in my life, despite my love of it, and you have provided it wrapped in leafy juicy healthy green guise, marred only by chronological inconvenience capable of turning creamy desire into rancid sickmaking temptress. I sometimes write beat poetry, most of it unreadable. Beat is the easiest thing in the world to do and the hardest to do right. I applaud you with virtual fingerclicks, never having been able to master the meatspace variety. ::click:: ::click:: ::click:: ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 10:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/27 "2003-01-19T10:28:45Z")
Ah, fuck off **Fenris** …some things (like Ginsberg poetry and Kerouac himself) are better left dead…they smell better that way!! ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/28 "2003-01-19T15:05:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Finagle \* > \*\*You live to vinegrette it. \*\* OK, now THAT’S funny! ---
**Author:** ![OxyMoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9a140/32.png) [@OxyMoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OxyMoron)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/29 "2003-01-19T19:01:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Green Bean \* > \*\*This Is Just to Say > > I have eaten > the dressing > that was in > the icebox > > and which > you were probably > saving > for your salad > > Forgive me > it was delicious > I left > the expired one. \*\* Paging Dr. Williams! Paging Dr. Williams! We have a hysteria-induced embolism! ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/30 "2003-01-20T02:05:55Z")
Anything can be enhanced with a William Carlos Williams parody, I’ve found. He’s just so parodiable. ---
**Author:** ![scablet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@scablet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scablet)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/31 "2003-01-20T02:22:30Z")
l(a le af fa ll s) et tu ce ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/32 "2003-01-20T03:15:22Z")
_snap snap snap_ And would have it been worth it, after all, After the bowl, the artichokes, the peas, To be at the porcelain, ralphing on your knees, Would it have been worth while, To have bitten off the lettuce with a smile, To have squeezed your intestines into a ball, To roil it towards some overwhelming indigestion, To say, ‘I am Lazarus, come from the dead, Come back to tell you all, I shall tell you all’ - T.S. Herder (Yeah, it ain’t Beat, sue me.) ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/33 "2003-01-20T03:26:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ferret Herder \* > \*\*(Yeah, it ain’t Beat, sue me.) \*\* No, first we’ll snap our fingers disapprovingly. Then we’ll beat you. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/34 "2003-01-20T19:13:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Derleth \* > No, first we’ll snap our fingers disapprovingly. > > Then we’ll beat you. > > 😃 Argh… OK, I walked into that one. I nearly used the :smack: smiley but I knew that the response would probably be “no, no - _snap_ not _smack_”. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/35 "2003-01-20T19:18:38Z")
See, that’s why you stash a small jar of Miracle Whip in the pantry. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/36 "2003-01-20T19:55:35Z")
Bwa ha ha! ---
**Author:** ![seal\_cleaner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@seal\_cleaner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seal_cleaner)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/37 "2003-01-20T20:33:28Z")
Ah yes…the **City Lights** salad bar… ---
**Author:** ![scablet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@scablet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scablet)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/38 "2003-01-20T20:34:30Z")
On a more helpful note, couldn’t this salad have been salvaged? Pick out the croutons and other items that turn unpleasant when wet, put the whole mess in a colander, rinse the rancid dressing off and pat-dry? Then again, I supose if all problems were solved so quickly we’d have very little literature of interest. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/39 "2003-01-20T20:39:24Z")
Scablet salad for everyone! ---
**Author:** ![Humble\_Servant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/47e85d/32.png) [@Humble\_Servant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Humble_Servant)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568/40 "2003-01-20T21:19:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fenris \* > \*\*Artichoke hearts and snow peas…beansprouts…raduccio and romaine… > > Fenris Ginsberg\*\* What, iceberg lettuce and Traditional Western Culture aren’t good enough for you? Not only are you a chi-chi foodie, you won’t even deign to make your namby-pamby attempt at poetry rhyme? Pseudo-elitist punk. Humble Upholder of Standards [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-salad-howl/149568.md?page=3)