# A Sandwich **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 10, 2005, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032 "2005-01-10T12:21:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/41 "2005-01-10T18:32:38Z")
I didn’t have a sammich for lunch on Saturday, and I didn’t have another one for dinner that night. I had tapas, which were notably un-sammichlike. We ordered all of them and had churros for desert. Churros with ice cream. They were to die for. Then we went home and had Eis Wein. I might have had a sammich on Friday, though. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/42 "2005-01-10T18:42:34Z")
> [@Sean Factotum](#): > > We got a Melting Pot ™ in Virginia Beach. They say to call and make reservations on the TV ads. The number they give you connects to an automated machine that tells you everything about the place except how to make a reservation. I don’t think I’m ever going to eat there. The one gene I inherited from my Dad prevents me from waiting more than five minutes for a table at a restaurant. And I’ve noticed that it has mutated (or evolved) to include avoiding answering machines with delusions of grandeur. Oh Gawd, where? I gotta know so I can stay away! BTW, **SF** , I had brekkie Saturday morning at the Pocahontas Pancake House on Atlantic Ave., in a rare trip across the river. Tacky and expensive, it embodied every personal stereotype I have about Virginia Beach… ---
**Author:** ![lightingtool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/57b2e6/32.png) [@lightingtool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lightingtool)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/43 "2005-01-10T18:51:05Z")
Hi. My name’s Tom. I’ve done my best to lead a good life. My father (Mr. Ato) always took great care of himself, and let me tell you, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree (or something). I’ve got great skin, with a nice firmness to me. In fact, I’m so good looking that somebody bought me and took me home with him the other day. So, now I’m just hanging around, waiting for whatever comes next (My dad was never to clear about what happens after somebody buys you). Hey, here comes that guy who bought me. What the hell is that noise? Oh - he’s singing. Yikes. Hey, looks like he’s making a sammich! That bread sure does smell good. Hey there, pal, careful with the squeezing! I’m ripe, I’m ripe! Geez. Now he’s got a knife?! What’s going on around here? Did he just say it’s a little dull!!!??? A dull knife? AAAAAAHHHHH!!! Daddy, you never told me about this! Holy cow - the edge on that thing looks like it was used to cut a 2x4. No NO back away get away from me with that knife **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGHHH** ooh the pain, the pain. If only he was using a sharp kni … **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW!** Dad? Dad, is that you? I see a bright light, and the pain is going away. Oh, look it’s the old vine I grew up on. And the family’s all gathered around. Ah, peace at last. _~Fin~_ Next week: The story of the Lettuce. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/44 "2005-01-10T18:56:36Z")
Banana sammiches with mayo. Yuck. I am not mentioning it to Mr. Lissar- he puts mayo on everything, and he’d probably think it was a good idea. Yuck. I love you, **swampy** , but… yuck. I think I love **lightingtool** , too. Way to go. That was very weird. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/45 "2005-01-10T18:57:28Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > What on earth is a toast bonnet? It’s like a meat helmet, only with toasted bread instead of meat. Dr. Evil: The details of my life are quite inconsequential… very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. **In the spring we’d make meat helmets.** When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum… it’s breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/46 "2005-01-10T18:57:40Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > I also lurve mater sammiches with lots of salt and pepper and mayo on em. The kind of mater sammich you need to stand over the kitchen sink and eat cause it’s so drippy. Mater sammiches are my favorite summer sammich. > > -swmapbear (that reminds me, I’m all out of nanners) Mmmmmmmmm, my mouth is watering. I don’t get to eat many mater sammiches anymore cause there are too many carbs and fat in the mayo and bread, even though I found a Hellman’s _light_ mayo that’s not too bad. But, oh, are they gooooooooood. Ya gots to stack the tomato slices real high so the bread get’s all juicey. Mmmmmmmmm. Out west in the Rockies I got turned on to avacado and jack cheese sammiches. They are spitlicious, too. Another was melted cheddar and pepperocini (sp?) sammiches. When I was a kid I ate some odd sammiches such as baloney sammiches, hold the baloney, extra mustard. And for some odd reason, cottage cheese sammiches with chopped scallions were occasionally wolfed down. When there are six kids in the family, ya gots to slap whatever in between two slices of wonderbread. I’m just sayin’. Tupug (Who just ate a nanner sammich…hold the bread and mayo) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/47 "2005-01-10T18:57:47Z")
Fungus is good! Sure, there’s some evil, slimy fungus out there, but don’t hold it against the good fungus. Don’t be a fungusist! Or a complete whack-a-doodle like that guy scout went out with. Goodness darling, he didn’t have a big hole in his basement and seem unnaturally pre-occupied with lotion, did he scout? And **swampy** , quit trying to fool people into thinking there’s such a thing as banana sammiches. It’s just a trick them southern folk play to keep everyone from moving down there. Tip: those accents are fake. The fried okra is for real though. Plus swampy, get yourself some really good calamari and tell yer sweetie pookins that it’s fish or some like. Then a-HA! him with the truth. For really good calamari take him down to that place in Yachat, Oregon (or no cal, I was on the road for quite a while and it tended to blend). Next morning go to the doughnut shop for brekkist and learn why Krispy Kreme should be ashamed of themselves for more than just bad spelling. What’s the best peanut butter? I grew up with Skippy, then I thought Jif (F?) was best, but now it all tastes nasty. Maybe it’s like the Twinkie revelation. When I was growing up, Twinkies were great and then I tried them again a few years ago and they were just gritty sugar-lard stuffed into a sticky cake-foam substance that tasted of chemicals. ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/48 "2005-01-10T19:15:16Z")
> [@Rue DeDay](#): > > Give my creation! CHEESE! And a side of Fritos too. [Dr. Wierd] GENTLEMEN! I give you… CHEESE! And some Fritos. [/DrW] ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/49 "2005-01-10T19:31:44Z")
I’m going to Toronto. I’m bringing a banana, some mayo and two slices of light (southern for white) bread. I’m gonna find **Mr. Lissar**. I’m gone tell him how to make a nanner sammich. I’m gone get him to eat it in front of **Lissla**. So There! 😛 Then, I’m goin’ out to where ever it is **Ashes[sup]2[/sup]** lives. Again, I’m gonna bring a banana, some mayo and two slices of light bread. I’m gone make me a nanner sammich and eat it in front of her while tawkin’ all suthrun lak. So There! 😛 -swampbear ( So There! 😛 ) ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/50 "2005-01-10T20:00:07Z")
Okay, so The Boy says that he always refers to a sandwich as “a sandwich” unless he’s referring to a specific type (ie “Subway Club”, “turkey ham and cheddar”). Does this mean I can keep him? ---
**Author:** ![Wintermute](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e19b73/32.png) [@Wintermute](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wintermute)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/51 "2005-01-10T20:01:54Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > …You can slather the mayo in the bread and slice up the nanner or you can smoosh the nanner and mayo together and slap it between two slices of bread…I have my standards, after all. Um, apparently not! **Swampy** , I love you, you know I love you, but yuck! And I grew up in California; we put mayonnaise on everything, even hot dogs. But bananas?! No. Mayonnaise does not belong on bananas. My favorite sandwiches are ones I can’t really get anymore, one, because avocados are mad expensive on the east coast, and two, good sourdough bread is really hard to find. Actually, the second one is just a general complaint, brought on by \*\*Rue’s \*\* mention of sourdough in the OP. The real reason you can’t get my favorite sandwich anymore is that the only deli that made them closed. Oh, I can get the ingredients together and do it myself, but it’s not the same. ---
**Author:** ![beckwall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b487fb/32.png) [@beckwall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beckwall)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/52 "2005-01-10T20:13:25Z")
> [@scout1222](#): > > Okay, so The Boy says that he always refers to a sandwich as “a sandwich” unless he’s referring to a specific type (ie “Subway Club”, “turkey ham and cheddar”). > > Does this mean I can keep him? You should keep him. And bring him to all future So Cal. Dopefests. I enjoy meeting people with a succinct yet accurate way of describing sandwiches. ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/53 "2005-01-10T20:13:55Z")
> [@VunderBob](#): > > Oh Gawd, where? I gotta know so I can stay away! > > BTW, **SF** , I had brekkie Saturday morning at the Pocahontas Pancake House on Atlantic Ave., in a rare trip across the river. Tacky and expensive, it embodied every personal stereotype I have about Virginia Beach… Somewhere in one of the Hilltop Plazas (First Colonial and Laskin Road). I’m not sure exactly where, because they are a secret restaurant. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/54 "2005-01-10T20:21:37Z")
> [@Sean Factotum](#): > > Somewhere in one of the Hilltop Plazas (First Colonial and Laskin Road). I’m not sure exactly where, because they are a secret restaurant. I looked them up and their address was 15?? Laskin Road. It scared me for a moment, until I found the address for The Purple Cow (one of my top 3 fave burger joints), which was 9??, meaning they should be at least a half mile apart. The ? cover digits that I don’t remember. If/when I find a house to rent or buy, you’ll get an invite to come over to my side of the river to hang out and drink beer and eat sammiches. I might even do a Dopefest just to PO my future neighbors. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/55 "2005-01-10T20:26:33Z")
I’m very hungry. I don’t think we’re eating sandwiches today but for dinner I’m making a Caesar salad with lots of bacon, and scalloped potatoes with extra cheese. I’d add roasted potato cubes to the Caesar but that seems kind of redundant. For lunch I’m eating leftover pizza. There will be nine people here for a party on Friday. I’ve just figured out the menu, with assistance from Quasi-Daughter. Nine people is a whole lot. Our apartment isn’t very big, and four of the people are over six feet tall. They take up a lot of room, especially lying down. I’lll encourage them not to lie down. We’re going to have stew, which I’ll make in the crockpot and a big pot on the stove, hummus, homemade naan, black bean and roasted pepper dip, and maybe something else I haven’t thought of yet. Not sure about dessert. We have a limited amount of counter space so I’m doing all one-pot type food. Salad might involve too many plates, since we won’t be sitting at the table. Our table isn’t very big, either. Mr. Lissar’s godmum is bringing wine. Maybe I’ll force Quasi-Daughter to make dessert. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/56 "2005-01-10T20:32:20Z")
I just picked up a platic grocery bag. On the bottom it says TO AVOID DANGER OF SUFFOCATION, KEEP AWAY FROM BABIES AND CHILDREN I didn’t realise all babies were secret stranglers. Now I’ve been warned, and I felt I ought to pass on the knowledge. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/57 "2005-01-10T20:54:17Z")
> [@scout1222](#): > > Okay, so The Boy says that he always refers to a sandwich as “a sandwich” unless he’s referring to a specific type (ie “Subway Club”, “turkey ham and cheddar”). > > Does this mean I can keep him? I dunno **scout**. Maybe you need to find out what he calls a manwich first. If he says either sloppy joe or a meal, there’s hope. **Winnie** I’m comin’ to where you live next. I’m bringin’ a nanner, some mayo and some light bread. I’m gone make me a nanner sammich and eat it in front of you too. So There! 😛 Nanner sammiches are good! Specially with tater chips to make it crunchy. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/58 "2005-01-10T21:12:41Z")
If I say I don’t like nanner and mayo sammiches will you come here or will you see it as the clever ruse it is? I’ve never had a nanner and mayo one; but I love peanut butter and nanner ones. I do know that sour cream, nanners and brown sugar make a wonderful topping/filling for crepes. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/59 "2005-01-10T21:22:29Z")
> [@Homebrew](#): > > I do know that sour cream, nanners and brown sugar make a wonderful topping/filling for crepes. Strawberries rolled in sour cream and then brown sugar are nummers, too. **swampy** , just for you I’m gonna try a tiny nanner-mayo sammich to see if I likes it. I’ll let ya know tamarra. ---
**Author:** ![susan\_foster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@susan\_foster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan_foster)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2005, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032/60 "2005-01-10T21:39:40Z")
I think Rue will be very proud that he was able to write a MMP that was at 2 pages by 5:00 pm (EST) on Monday. Very, very proud. As for me - going to leave soon, and have a non-sammich dinner. (Okay, I admit - I am calling them sammiches to fit in with the rest of the thread. They are actually sandwiches. There - I said it!). Susan [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-sandwich/284032.md?page=4)