# A short walk sadly spoiled **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 14, 2016, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526 "2016-10-14T17:23:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/1 "2016-10-14T17:23:15Z")
I was walking home earlier today - after lunch - when it started raining. I had an umbrella and offered to share it with a lady who had been caught out and was sheltering. And instead of accepting or politely declining she shrank back. How sad it is that a woman feels she cannot share the umbrella of a man. How much sadder it is that she was afraid. ---
**Author:** ![Waxwinged](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c2a13f/32.png) [@Waxwinged](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waxwinged)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/2 "2016-10-14T17:56:37Z")
That’s a perfectly sensible reaction if you’re a stranger to her. Giving unasked-for help is something straight out of The Gift of Fear. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/3 "2016-10-14T17:59:58Z")
Were you wearing pants? ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/4 "2016-10-14T18:02:55Z")
I was sure this was going to be a golf thread. You did say short walk, though. Maybe a putt-putt thread. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/5 "2016-10-14T18:06:00Z")
“… and so, rebuffed by humanity, the Penguin turned to a solitary life of crime.” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/6 "2016-10-14T18:18:08Z")
Upon further reflection after my flippant comment (which is pretty much how my whole life operates), I think that were I really concerned about the lady getting wet I would have just offered to loan her the umbrella and let her make the suggestion that we share. Sharing an umbrella does seem to me to be a bit more intimate than a nod and smile. ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/7 "2016-10-14T18:30:48Z")
These days I am surprised and delighted if someone merely returns a smile. ---
**Author:** ![Corry\_El](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecae2f/32.png) [@Corry\_El](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corry_El)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/8 "2016-10-14T18:36:04Z")
As a (late middle aged) NY area native I wouldn’t expect a positive reaction if I made such an offer and wouldn’t, to preempt awkwardness. _Give_ somebody my umbrella who seemed much more troubled by the rain, OK; offer to share a cab I got to first in the rain, that I’ve done and most people have I think. It’s not as likely to be considered creepy, and you could always just say ‘well you take it’ if the share offer is declined. But also depends on age (I feel less tension in female strangers’ reaction to me as as I’ve aged), dress (less in a suit), etc. ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/9 "2016-10-14T18:42:26Z")
For the past couple of decades, I’ve noticed that females will not even make eye contact with me in the supermarket or library. It’s a USA thing. But when traveling overseas (even Canada!), women are perfectly open and willing to graciously accept a courtesy or a social acknowledgement, or even a quick hug. (But I have not been in western Europe, so I can’t speak to that.) I even got a hug from an Indonesian girl in a hijab. An Emirates flight attendant asked me for a hug when I got off the plane. ---
**Author:** ![Grey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Grey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grey)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/10 "2016-10-14T18:49:54Z")
> [@Waxwinged](#): > > That’s a perfectly sensible reaction if you’re a stranger to her. Giving unasked-for help is something straight out of The Gift of Fear. It’s an over reaction to simple offer. She could have easily declined without shrinking back in fear. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/11 "2016-10-14T18:51:22Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > For the past couple of decades, I’ve noticed that females will not even make eye contact with me in the supermarket or library. It’s a USA thing. Do you wear pants? ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/12 "2016-10-14T18:57:48Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Do you wear pants? No, I go out and hit on chicks in my undies. Do you suppose that’s the problem? ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/13 "2016-10-14T19:00:10Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Do you wear pants? No, I go out and hit on chicks in my undies. Do you suppose that’s the problem? Can’t help asking – when yu turn around and head back to port, do you rekayak? ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/14 "2016-10-14T19:02:40Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > No, I go out and hit on chicks in my undies. Do you suppose that’s the problem? > > Can’t help asking – when yu turn around and head back to port, do you rekayak? And how they got in your undies, you’ll never know. ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/15 "2016-10-14T19:10:24Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > No, I go out and hit on chicks in my undies. Do you suppose that’s the problem? It could be. Those stained tidy-whities limit your pool of possible successes. Next time go with the blue ones with Sponge Bob on them. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/16 "2016-10-14T19:14:50Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > Can’t help asking – when yu turn around and head back to port, do you rekayak? I never turn around; always circumnavigate until back where I started. See the world! ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/17 "2016-10-14T19:42:36Z")
That is a bit disheartening, **Quartz** , but please don’t let that stop you from offering your kindness in the future. If I were caught in the rain I would gladly share an umbrella (as long as the owner was wearing pants). ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/18 "2016-10-14T19:50:19Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Do you wear pants? I fidget a lot in my chair, so, yes I do. ---
**Author:** ![Turpentine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Turpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turpentine)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/19 "2016-10-14T20:02:59Z")
I’ve seen you make unpleasant, misogynistic posts in the past, and when people on the board have called you out on it, you firmly defend your stance. So I don’t doubt that you give off major creep vibes in real life. No wonder she shrank back in terror. The fact that you feel outraged and entitled that she didn’t want to share your umbrella says something about you, too. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2016, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526/20 "2016-10-14T20:30:51Z")
> [@Turpentine](#): > > I’ve seen you make unpleasant, misogynistic posts in the past, and when people on the board have called you out on it, you firmly defend your stance. Cite? > [@](#): > > The fact that you feel outraged and entitled that she didn’t want to share your umbrella says something about you, too. Outraged and entitled? You’re inventing; I feel saddened. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-short-walk-sadly-spoiled/768526.md?page=2)