# A strange thing happened on my way to a business trip....... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 28, 2018, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940 "2018-06-28T19:01:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/21 "2018-06-29T16:24:49Z")
> [@DummyGladHands](#): > > Why would you not just turn around and say HEY, STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE. ?? Because that’s a job for courageous bystanders! ---
**Author:** ![Flyer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/flyer/32/7298_2.png) [@Flyer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flyer)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/22 "2018-06-29T16:45:51Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > I am sorry that happened. If it ever happens again, you absolutely should say something to someone in security (and there should be at least one female officer). Say it loud and proud, or step out of line and quietly say something to the person at the machine. If you think about it in advance, it’s easier to deal with it in the moment. I absolutely know how those moments can absolutely petrify you and all you want to do is get through it and get away. Guys like that deserve all the shit that the TSA can bring to bear on their unpleasant little selves. > [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Say something. “Hey man, that’s not okay.” “Hey officer, this guy is hassling that woman.” “This guy is being a jerk.” “Don’t do that.” > > I’d opt for calling the officer over myself. Arguing with someone at a checkpoint is probably not going to go well. In another place, start by saying something. > [@I\_can\_t\_think\_of\_a\_name](#): > > I’d have them complain to the security staff who are right there. > > Strange behaviour at an airport is one of the factors in assessing a potential security risk, so it would be appropriate for a particularly thorough security checking to be done on a person who behaved that way. Maybe they’re stressed about something bad they’re intending to do. Should be checked. I’m surprised that so many people think that the TSA should be the first line of defense against something like that. Have you people never read the news? The TSA is basically government-sponsored sexual harassment and groping. I suppose that some of the agents might act out of a sense of trying to preserve their official monopoly on such things, but that would be about the only reason. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/23 "2018-06-29T16:51:32Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > Because that’s a job for courageous bystanders! I disagree. Or rather, I think everyone should speak up. Women need to be able to call out bad behavior. StG ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/24 "2018-06-29T16:55:38Z")
> [@StGermain](#): > > I disagree. Or rather, I think everyone should speak up. Women need to be able to call out bad behavior. > > StG If the woman doesn’t seem to mind, why should I? ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/25 "2018-06-29T17:02:09Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > What would you have courageous bystanders do in this situation? Point at him and say “that man’s luggage was out of his control for a full five minutes while he was praying to Mecca.” Put the results on YouTube. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/26 "2018-06-29T17:26:50Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > If the woman doesn’t seem to mind, why should I? At the BARE minimum, because your silence sets a shitty example for small boys who are still working out what is and is not ok to say to strangers. And if the woman truly doesn’t seem to mind then you’re most likely in a strip club. Funny thing about not being a hermit, societal norms are directed by the behaviors of the individuals comprising that society. Everybody Harasses, harassment is cool. Nobody condemns harassment, harassment is cool. Everybody condemns harassment, harassment is NOT cool. TLDR: Silence is acceptance. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/27 "2018-06-29T17:28:25Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > At the BARE minimum, because your silence sets a shitty example for small boys who are still working out what is and is not ok to say to strangers. And if the woman truly doesn’t seem to mind then you’re most likely in a strip club. > > Funny thing about not being a hermit, societal norms are directed by the behaviors of the individuals comprising that society. Everybody Harasses, harassment is cool. Nobody condemns harassment, harassment is cool. Everybody condemns harassment, harassment is NOT cool. TLDR: Silence is acceptance. And in the OP, how did she let anyone know that she minded? ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/28 "2018-06-29T17:33:11Z")
You’ve never been stunned? Gobsmacked? You’ve always immediately and accurately sussed a situation and took immediate and appropriate corrective action? I can’t speak for OP or anyone else, but that’s the exception for me rather than the rule. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/29 "2018-06-29T17:51:02Z")
Not a woman, but I’d be tempted to draw the belt out of the belt loops, and languidly hand it to the TSA officer, while drawling in my best Southern, “Officer, whip that man.” ---
**Author:** ![DummyGladHands](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/49beb7/32.png) [@DummyGladHands](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DummyGladHands)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/30 "2018-06-29T18:03:13Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > You’ve never been stunned? Gobsmacked? You’ve always immediately and accurately sussed a situation and took immediate and appropriate corrective action? I can’t speak for OP or anyone else, but that’s the exception for me rather than the rule. Perhaps, but that shit has happened to me way to often to give a shit about embarrassing myself or anyone else. Including my girlfriend who was appalled when I shouted at some asshole on the street who was clearly following us ( and once I noticed him I took a deliberatively crazy route) and rubbing himself. Just don’t fucking let it happen. I did it in a grocery store line once too when an asshole got close enough behind me that his abdomen was touching my ass. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/31 "2018-06-29T18:03:56Z")
> [@laurieb](#): > > As I was unbuckling, a guy behind me started grinning and saying shit like, “ooh, we’re in for a show from this babe!” and “strip baby strip!” What an idiot. I just hope that it was he who got ‘special attention’ from the TSA. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/32 "2018-06-29T18:06:48Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > And in the OP, how did she let anyone know that she minded? The guy literally told you. Outside a strip club, the default is that people don’t want to be catcalled. Or you could just read the OP and find out that she reacted in stunned, blushing silence, not with appreciation. You seem to be determined to find an excuse that men should be able to catcall like this without consequence. Or to blame the victim. Please stop, and show compassion. on previous: same for you, **DummyGladHands**. You’re attacking the OP for not responding “properly.” That is victim blaming and not okay. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/33 "2018-06-29T18:11:09Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > The guy literally told you. Outside a strip club, the default is that people don’t want to be catcalled. Or you could just read the OP and find out that she reacted in stunned, blushing silence, not with appreciation. > > You seem to be determined to find an excuse that men should be able to catcall like this without consequence. Or to blame the victim. Please stop, and show compassion. Of course I don’t think men should be able to catcall like this without consequence. I just think the receiver of such catcalling should do something about it first if they find it offensive. After that, then sure, thoughts and intentions are clear and a courageous bystander would do well to intervene. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/34 "2018-06-29T18:14:56Z")
Not all women are brave enough to immediately respond to such nonsense. Perhaps she’s stunned that it happened at all. Perhaps she has a flashback to some abuse she suffered in the past and freezes as a defense mechanism. Perhaps she’s embarrassed and doesn’t want to cause more of a fuss. Here’s a tip: No woman wants to be harassed. And thanks, **Sailboat** , for making me snort ice water out my nose. It’s the Southern accent that nails it. ---
**Author:** ![PastTense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pasttense/32/14550_2.png) [@PastTense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PastTense)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/35 "2018-06-29T18:15:18Z")
An alternative solution is buy a belt with no metal in it. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/36 "2018-06-29T18:16:40Z")
> [@PastTense](#): > > An alternative solution is buy a belt with no metal in it. So a woman can’t wear a cute metal belt for fear some guy might catcall her for it when she takes it off during a TSA screening? :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/37 "2018-06-29T18:23:54Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > Not all women are brave enough to immediately respond to such nonsense. Perhaps she’s stunned that it happened at all. Perhaps she has a flashback to some abuse she suffered in the past and freezes as a defense mechanism. Perhaps she’s embarrassed and doesn’t want to cause more of a fuss. > > Here’s a tip: No woman wants to be harassed. I see. So us brave men need to stick up for the poor, scared women? ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/38 "2018-06-29T18:30:21Z")
Oh, give me a break. Is it too much to ask that humans stand up for other humans when they see something wrong? ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/39 "2018-06-29T18:30:38Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > I see. So us brave men need to stick up for the poor, scared women? Not just men. Women can speak up too. Humans, with humanity. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2018, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940/40 "2018-06-29T18:38:00Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > Oh, give me a break. Is it too much to ask that humans stand up for other humans when they see something wrong? Sure ok. I saw a guy grab another woman’s ass on the Metro. I went over and said “Hey buddy, that’s not cool!” and he told me to fuck off because it was his wife. That’s what you are advocating for me to do, because no woman wants to be harassed. I feel comfortable in reacting to a situation like that if the target lets it be known that he/she is offended or something. Until then, if, in a crowded airport with numerous security guards and such around, they don’t think it’s a big enough deal to say something or tell someone or pretty much do anything, then why would I think it was such a big deal? That doesn’t make any sense to me. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-strange-thing-happened-on-my-way-to-a-business-trip/816940.md?page=3)