# A surprising encounter for the SDMB One-Trick-Pony Chowder and Marching Society w/H4E **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 13, 2002, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584 "2002-11-13T15:34:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/1 "2002-11-13T15:34:03Z")
**Hiyruu** : …so you see, that by reconciling love and the golden harmonic we have hard proof (_SCIENCE_ proof too. Not that other stuff) that Jews _are_ the moon-men who love giving blow-jobs in SUV’s to Englebert Humperdink. (Everyone nods. It’s _all_ comin’ together! ) (Well, almost everyone) **Moo-Moo** : What about returned trolls? Huh? There’s thousands of trolls infesting the SDMB! How does _THAT_ fit into your too-too pat theory?! The MODS know! Those Mods are engaging in disgusting, slime-encrusted, vile, hatred-spewing, _stupid_… (“Lenny and Squiggy”-like, His4Ever walks in) **His4Ever** : Hello. **KayKay** : Hellooooo Nurse! I love giving blow-jobs. ALL women should give blow-jobs. **His4Ever** : Then you’re goin’ to H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks **Seethruart** : Hedoublehockysticks? What? Does this have to do with the moon-men? Is this a code? **Sweet Willy** : It sounds like a _jewish_ code. Jews control hockey. **KingNifty** : Cite? **Taggart** : A _republican_ Jewish code. Um…I’m a Republican, by the way. Really. Honestly. **KingNifty** : Cite? **FatherJohn** : A Republican-Jewish code about SUVs! ON THE MOON! ( **FatherJohn** grins. It’s still _all_ comin’ together.) **His4Ever** : No! The…um…the hot place! **KayKay** : My bedroom? **His4Ever** : No. (thinks) Well, maybe. Don’t you see? Jesus hates you and wants to send you to…um…the burny place with the fire and the devils and the pitchforks. **Sweet Willy** : The headquarters of the Anti Defamation League? **KingNifty** : You’re not in GD. Cite?! **His4Ever** : Don’t you see? Unless you believe in HIM, he’s gonna make you BURN! He hates you and wants to see you burn but if you say the magic words he’ll save you. But you HAVETA SAY THE MAGIC WORDS! Since you’re being mean, I’m going to leave. **Hiyruu** : He-who? **Deeward** : I think she means Englebert. But she’s wrong. Englebert loves us, every one. **Hiyruu** : (nods) I see. **KingNifty** : No you don’t. Not without a cite. **Taggart** : As a republican, I want to know what the magic words are. **His4Ever** : No! I mean Jesus! **Deeward** : There’s no need to swear. Englebert wouldn’t want it. **His4Ever** : I’m NOT swearing! I mean Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior! And I’m leaving. You’re just being mean to me ‘cause Jesus doesn’t hate me as much as he hates all of you. Don’t listen to the liberal so-called Christians talking about Jesus’s lovingkindness and compassion an’ stuff. Jesus hates you. He hates everyone. That’s why he’s sendin’ you to the burning place. 'Cause he hates you. But not me ‘cause I’m special. He luvs me. And the magic words that’ll make him save you is “Jesus loves me/Yes he do/This I know/ 'cause it is true”. An’ if you say the words you can do whatever you want **Seethruart** : Jesus was an alien, you know. **His4Ever** : What? **Seethruart** : Y’know all that stuff about wheels in the sky and flaming chariots? He was an alien. Anti-gravity devices. **Hiyruu** : Anti-Gravity devices can be made with popsicle sticks, if they’re set up via the golden ratio. It’s possible that the Cross was made with the Golden Ratio in mind. **FatherJohn** : FatherJohn can’t remember…isn’t Jesus the one who turns everything to gold with his touch? (Unlike SUVs which ruin everything) **His4Ever** : No. That was Midas! And I’m going. And Jesus hates you. But he loves me. Nyaah. **FatherJohn** : Then what was Jesus’s super power? **His4Ever** : He turned water into wine… **FatherJohn** : He polluted our water? FatherJohn thinks there’ll be a lot of DEAD FISH if you turn oceans into booze! What kind of stupid-super-power is that? **His4Ever** : It’s NOT A SUPER POWER! You’re all being mean. I’m leaving. **Uekte** : How old was Jesus. Cause if Jesus was old then he SHOULD DIE! **His4Ever** : He was crucified at 33 years old. By the way. I’m leavin’ and you’re burning…well, you WILL be burning. **Ukete** : That’s not old. He shouldn’ta died. **Jack Dean Tyler** : Do you think that Jesus was circumcised? **His4Ever** : Of course he was. And I’m leaving. And THEN you’ll be sorry ‘cause without me, you’ll burn and Jesus and me ‘ll look down from heaven and laugh and laugh and laugh as your skin crackles and hair blackens and flesh melts and you’ll scream forever and ever and ever but you’ll never get out of the burny place but me and Jesus will be together forever and you’ll be with the homersexuals an’ th’ forner-caters an’ th’ mean people and like that. And we won’t be. So I’m going. (As she flounces out the door, she turns her head, looks over her shoulder and sticks out her tongue.) **Hiyruu** : That was…odd. And this is ME saying that. **SweetWilly** : I wonder if she w… **FatherJohn** : No, you idiot. Of _course_ she wasn’t Jewish. :rolleyes: **Seethruart** : Yeah you moron. It was obvious that she was an alien. ---
**Author:** ![Trion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@Trion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trion)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/2 "2002-11-13T15:41:35Z")
That’s it. You’re goin’ to hell. ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/3 "2002-11-13T15:42:38Z")
_you don’t really think she’s going to reply here, do you?_ heres a rainbow 😉 🙂 :o 🆒 :mad: 😕 ☹ :rolleyes: 😛 ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/4 "2002-11-13T15:43:53Z")
Be even funnier if she flounced away while riding an SUV . . .or would that be overkill? Heh. Heh. Heh. I wanna be an OTP too. ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/5 "2002-11-13T15:45:10Z")
haven’t you forgotten: “I’ll give you 10,000 if you can prove Jesus existed.!” “will be back tomorrow with the proof.” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![lynn73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@lynn73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lynn73)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/6 "2002-11-13T15:45:42Z")
Ohh, barother! More nonsense. Doesn’t even deserve anyone’s notice. Puuleeeeeez, give me a break! ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/7 "2002-11-13T15:47:04Z")
Fenris was exaggerating to try and be funny. He’s like that. ---
**Author:** ![lynn73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@lynn73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lynn73)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/8 "2002-11-13T15:47:21Z")
By the way, please stop impersonating me. You do not speak for me. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/9 "2002-11-13T15:49:41Z")
You speak for your God. That’s okay, but Fenrisatire isn’t? ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/10 "2002-11-13T15:50:29Z")
He’s not speaking for you. He’s mocking you. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/11 "2002-11-13T15:51:19Z")
I am the Lorax, I speak for the trees. ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/12 "2002-11-13T15:57:50Z")
I believe Satire is covered under fair usage of copywritten material. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/13 "2002-11-13T16:01:26Z")
I believe Saltire is a poster here. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/14 "2002-11-13T16:05:36Z")
I think we may all be going to hell: _Do not wear clothing of two kinds of material (Lev. 19:19)_ Do you think my Satanic micromesh underwear will keep me cool? ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/15 "2002-11-13T16:07:41Z")
Bwah-ha-ha! “Doesn’t deserve anyone’s notice” and, several minutes later “stop impersonating me” :: snerk :: Life imitates art. Fenris PS: **Vanilla** “_trying_ to be funny”??? “trying”??? :: sobs :: ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/16 "2002-11-13T16:24:42Z")
**his4ever** , at least you’re not being ignored . . . 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/17 "2002-11-13T16:27:15Z")
Mocking? Heck, it looks like he has her dead-to-rights. ---
**Author:** ![Billy\_Rubin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billy_rubin/32/3622_2.png) [@Billy\_Rubin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billy_Rubin)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/18 "2002-11-13T16:30:39Z")
Nice work, Fen. b. ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/19 "2002-11-13T16:36:46Z")
Actually it was kind of nostalgic seeing seethruarts name again… But where the hell is his links to his webpage that shows close up pictures of dirt “See there is the second stage of a proton rocket, they are mocking us! Here is another view upside dow and onther with a filter, and one upside down with a filter…” ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584/20 "2002-11-13T16:37:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by His4ever \* > \*\*Ohh, barother! More nonsense. Doesn’t even deserve anyone’s notice. Puuleeeeeez, give me a break! \*\* We’re _mean_. Why aren’t you _leaving_? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-surprising-encounter-for-the-sdmb-one-trick-pony-chowder-and-marching-society-w-h4e/136584.md?page=2)