# A talking toy doll of you is being made. What would it say? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 1, 2005, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868 "2005-11-01T05:31:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Jayn\_Newell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jayn\_Newell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayn_Newell)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/21 "2005-11-01T12:17:47Z")
“Don’t make me hurt you” followed by “Not in the good way” “Shut up Shawn.” “Go fuck flying feather dusters.” “No.” ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/22 "2005-11-01T12:20:41Z")
“Imagine my astonishment.” “Wow. That’s … weird.” “Merci!” “Hasta la banana.” “Hmph.” ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/23 "2005-11-01T12:52:04Z")
“Snid” “Watch out for the banana worms” “What does that taste like?” “Really? Please explain in more detail” “Radius is the only English word that means ‘radius’” ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/24 "2005-11-01T13:12:08Z")
“Basil! You are an idiot!” “Coooooooow” “numnumnumnumnumnumnummynum” “Did you want an honest answer, or a polite lie?” “Fair enough.” ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/25 "2005-11-01T13:43:58Z")
“I will _ **destroy** _ you _ **all** _!!!” “VENGENCE IS MINE!” “I denounce you as a counter-revolutionary & an Enemy of the State!” “On my command, unleash hell.” “MONKEYS! FRISBEES! **UNDERPANTS!!!** ” “I’m sorry.” 😉😃 ---
**Author:** ![Podkayne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Podkayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Podkayne)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/26 "2005-11-01T14:07:12Z")
The Professor Fries Doll[sup]TM[/sup] sez: - “The normal force does **not** always equal weight.” - “Those are vectors. You can’t add them like scalars.” - “Solve algebraically first, **then** plug in numbers!” - “Aaaaaand what’s the unit on that guy?” (I’m the only one who gets this, BTW. It’s my little private joke.) - “If you want to have a conversation, go out to the hall. If you want to stay, please, be quiet so the people around you can hear the lecture.” - “It’s in the syllabus.” - “It’s in the syllabus.” - “It’s in the syllabus.” ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/27 "2005-11-01T14:11:40Z")
And now… The full action DeVena Doll!! Singing whatever flits through the transom of her tiny little brain! This week - The Yodel Song from The Sound of Music!! “High on a hill stood a lonely goatherd. Lehdeohda lehdeohda leh he hooooo” And featuring the following catch phrases! Bite Me. And this would affect my job how? Time for my meds. Here, kitty kitty kitty! ---
**Author:** ![PapSett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@PapSett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PapSett)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/28 "2005-11-01T14:46:03Z")
“Stop it. Go lay down!” "Kharma ! Get off the counter!) “Nick ! Don’t eat the cat” (These directed to the little plush Gordon Setter that comes with my doll) "Oh my God, TOO funny! “Oh, PUH-leeeeeze!” ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/29 "2005-11-01T14:49:25Z")
“Coffee is God.” “Emma! Don’t scratch the couch.” “My work never ends.” ---
**Author:** ![Strinka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strinka/32/512_2.png) [@Strinka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strinka)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/30 "2005-11-01T14:52:35Z")
“Better than a stick in the eye!” “Physics is sexy.” “(whistles Saria’s Song)” Hmm… That’s all I can think of. I need more catchphrases. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/31 "2005-11-01T14:57:48Z")
“What?” “Where’s the tea?” Ok, so not. More like: “I need coffee.” “Jesus H. Christ!” “42.” “You have got to be kidding me.” “zzz…I can sleep a little longer.” ---
**Author:** ![NE\_Texan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e99b99/32.png) [@NE\_Texan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NE_Texan)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/32 "2005-11-01T15:02:20Z")
“You want to make a _what_?” “A talking doll!!! NO. Why?” “What are you doing with that tape recorder? **PUT THAT DOWN!** ” “Cut that out! I MEAN IT!” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/33 "2005-11-01T15:10:45Z")
\*\*Son of a _whore!_ Bollocks to _that!_ I could never marry any woman who’d have _me_ as a husband! Groovy. I got brains. In fact, I’ve got more brains in me lit’le finger than I got in me 'ole 'ead! Shiver me timbers an’ walk me plank! \*\* ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/34 "2005-11-01T15:41:43Z")
- Half way there, five more minutes (stock answer to any “Are we there yet?” question) - Aw, snap! - The light switch works two ways, you know! - …and a Diet Coke. - No, dear, I don’t know where your car keys are. You know, if you would keep them in the same place all the time you wouldn’t have this problem. Mine? Yes, I know where my car keys are. They’re either in my pocket or on the counter in my bathroom. That’s the only 2 places they ever are. Right now they happen to be in my pocket. Yes, you can borrow them, but only if you put them back _in my hands_ when you are finished. ---
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/35 "2005-11-01T15:45:22Z")
The Amazing Snakescatlady doll come complete with Columbus Cottonmouths game-worn hockey jersey and replica cat. Pull her string and she says: “Cricket, leave that alone!” “Hey ref, I don’t know what game you’re watching but you’re missing a hell of a good one out there!” “Cricket, get down!” “He Shoots! He Scores!” Litter boxes and extra jerseys sold seperately. Contains small parts, not suitable for children. “No, I can’t do that - there’s a game tonight.” ---
**Author:** ![Revenant\_Threshold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@Revenant\_Threshold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revenant_Threshold)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/36 "2005-11-01T15:50:50Z")
Ohhhh, shit. Sneh. Eh? Uhm… No, that’s just _stupid_. True. ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/37 "2005-11-01T15:55:12Z")
How about a Daithi Lacha Speak-N-Spell, designed to screw up little kids? "The cow says, “Bahhhhhh!” "The dog says, “Moooooooo!” "The turtle says, “Hee-haw! Hee-haw!” Hm. Talking doll … “Buggery Bollocks!” “Piss!” “Ooh - cheese!” “One more and we’ll go, yeah?” and “_w-h-i-n-e!_” ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/38 "2005-11-01T16:02:26Z")
“pull my finger” (and the exciting set of various sounds that results) ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/39 "2005-11-01T16:09:00Z")
“Good morning” “I’d like a number 8 with a Diet Coke, please” “See ya tomorrow” _:: belches :: :: farts ::_ ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2005, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868/40 "2005-11-01T16:42:13Z")
Well, if you know what you’re doing, it’s not an adventure. Time to get up. Time to get up. Wake up!!! Hey, I’m going to work now. You’re on your own. Phone’s for you. Hey, I just drive. [snide, half-muffled laugh that indicates I just thought of something hilariously funny I could interject as a comment on something you just said, if I didn’t mind getting smacked down for it, which I do, so I just kind of snort…] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-talking-toy-doll-of-you-is-being-made-what-would-it-say/328868.md?page=3)