# A Thread for the Mueller Investigation Results and Outcomes (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 28, 2017, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093 "2017-10-28T20:14:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 435
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8683 "2018-12-31T17:25:09Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > She’ll be exchanged for Paul Whelan. The fix is in, just watch. 🙂 > > [Russian security agency arrests 'US spy' in Moscow - BBC News](https://www.bbc.com/news/amp/world-europe-46720262) > > If I’m wrong, I’ll gladly own it. But I doubt it. Worrying. On the one hand, if the President is under the control of the Russian government, and she is any significant portion of the puzzle, then her value as a witness is unmatched by just about anything. But on the other hand, if that is the case, then the President and a number of congressman all want her gone and can pull all sorts of levers to get the trade done. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8684 "2018-12-31T17:25:28Z")
Don’t, Susan! It’s a trap - the worm is poisoned! ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8685 "2018-12-31T17:28:52Z")
Damn it! I said “Moje vznášadlo je plné úhorov” when I meant “Moje vznášedlo je plné úhořů”! ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8686 "2018-12-31T18:10:48Z")
> [@MEBuckner](#): > > The owl flies at midnight, but the early bird gets the worm. Repeat: _The early bird gets the worm!_ > [@JohnT](#): > > Don’t, Susan! It’s a trap - the worm is poisoned! Wait! That’s not really Susan! THAT’S the trap! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8687 "2018-12-31T18:22:17Z")
While you’ve all been having a chuckle, I’ve gotten clear. Passports and euros are in my holdall, safe house is burned, and I’m on the freighter. A stranger (hired via a Craigslist “Gigs” listing) has my American credit cards and is on a flight to Omaha, but I’m just now crossing into international waters. Time to break out my stash of Circus Peanuts - - do you have any idea how hard it is to find those in Istanbul? The owl has indeed flown at midnight… If you or Bob need me, don’t use this channel anymore. I’ll find you. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8688 "2018-12-31T18:24:48Z")
> [@digs](#): > > While you’ve all been having a chuckle, I’ve gotten clear. Passports and euros are in my holdall, safe house is burned, and I’m on the freighter. A stranger (hired via a Craigslist “Gigs” listing) has my American credit cards and is on a flight to Omaha, but I’m just now crossing into international waters. > > The owl has indeed flown at midnight… If you or Bob need me, don’t use this channel anymore. I’ll find you. I’ll be at that place where we did that thing that time. I’ll wear the outfit I wore that night. So I’ll know it’s you, just do that thing you do. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8689 "2018-12-31T18:30:14Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > I’ll be at that place where we did that thing that time. I’ll wear the outfit I wore that night. So I’ll know it’s you, just do that thing you do. Give me a week or so - - still recovering from the last time we did that thing. And I’m afraid they’ll spot that distinctive limp… ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8690 "2018-12-31T18:34:28Z")
> [@digs](#): > > Give me a week or so - - still recovering from the last time we did that thing. And I’m afraid they’ll spot that distinctive limp… At least you survived. Your predecessor was not so fortunate. I don’t mean he died, just that… never mind ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8691 "2018-12-31T18:38:19Z")
Dammit, that’s hard to hear. … sigh … This life. Does take a toll, no doubt about it. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8692 "2018-12-31T18:49:26Z")
:: flexes leather-gloved fingers, screws silencer on matte black pistol :: ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8693 "2018-12-31T18:51:55Z")
Try not to leave a mess this time. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8694 "2018-12-31T18:52:34Z")
:: Nods to himself in renewed acceptance of their duty. Makes sure detonators and c-4 are dry and secure, ready for this final mission :: ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8695 "2018-12-31T19:22:57Z")
**Don, Jr.** Hey, guys, I just got back from the Secret Meeting with all those Russians who work for Vladimir Putin who are helping out Dad by hacking Hillary’s e-mails! #SecretMeetingWithTheRussians **[del]Don, Jr.[/del]** **Individual-2** Oh, wait, I was supposed to use some sort of Secret Code for that, wasn’t I? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8696 "2018-12-31T19:36:20Z")
> [@MEBuckner](#): > > **Don, Jr.** Hey, guys, I just got back from the Secret Meeting with all those Russians who work for Vladimir Putin who are helping out Dad by hacking Hillary’s e-mails! #SecretMeetingWithTheRussians > > **[del]Don, Jr.[/del]** **Individual-2** Oh, wait, I was supposed to use some sort of Secret Code for that, wasn’t I? \*The team mobilizes, ready to spring into action, every one of them death incarnate. ThelmaLou, on comms, receives a tell-tale ping. “Stop.” “Ain’t really started yet, Lou.” “Shuddup, Buckner, and let the lady work.” “Yeah, boss. Sorry, Lou.” Waving them quiet, TL focuses on her reader. Eyes widening, she barks in surprise “Mission aborted!” “What the hell?” “Fuck!” “Dammit!”, more, erupted from the team. “Why, Lou? Did they tell you?” “Yeah. He just… [He just tweeted it out. After a years worth of planning, he just… tweeted… it… out.](https://twitter.com/donaldjtrumpjr/status/884789418455953413?)”\* ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8697 "2018-12-31T21:06:50Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > Did they drive to California? Wouldn’t airlines have a record? > > I mean, sure, I guess it’s possible to by an airline ticket with cash and use a fake name, but why it the hell would he do that? Only possible if you have an ID with the fake name - can’t fly without a driver’s license or a passport. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8698 "2018-12-31T21:09:39Z")
> [@Folacin](#): > > Only possible if you have an ID with the fake name - can’t fly without a driver’s license or a passport. Right. So there should be a record of him at least purchasing a ticket. Not sure how accurate or how long they might keep records showing he really got on a plane. ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8699 "2018-12-31T21:17:17Z")
All of you saying that it’s funny that Cohen would deny being somewhere, when there should be a paper trail contradicting that, and he wouldn’t be dumb enough to not know that, are missing, I think, a salient point. People like that don’t think like that. They’ve never met a problem they couldn’t lie/bluster/bribe their way out of - they just go ahead and do whatever, and then lie about it later. No elaborate schemes to avoid notice, just depending on blustering and bullshitting if they happen to get caught. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8700 "2018-12-31T21:31:21Z")
It’s true that I’m not Susan. ---
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8701 "2018-12-31T21:57:46Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > I guess we’ll find out soon enough. All I can say is, you are aptly named, my friend. 🙂 Hehehe, you’re the second person who’s noted that on the board. I can’t say you’re wrong, even if that wasn’t the original meaning when I took the name. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093/8702 "2018-12-31T22:19:59Z")
> [@susan](#): > > It’s true that I’m not Susan. Oh God. We’re doomed. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093.md?page=434) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-thread-for-the-mueller-investigation-results-and-outcomes-part-1/800093.md?page=436)