# A vampire, a werewolf,  and a zombie ...

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [October 31, 2011, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404 "2011-10-31T18:24:14Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1

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### Author: ![AtomicDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@AtomicDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AtomicDog)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/1 "2011-10-31T18:24:14Z")

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Bites you at the same time.

Assuming you get away, what happens?

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### Author: ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/2 "2011-10-31T18:27:55Z")

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I go to the nearest bar, where the bartender asks me if this is some kind of a joke…

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### Author: ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/3 "2011-10-31T18:31:01Z")

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You probably become an NPC, because Abominations are ridiculously overpowered.

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### Author: ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/4 "2011-10-31T18:32:37Z")

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Bah, any real mythology reader knows that monsters aren’t “infectious.” If you get away, then you’re lucky and have some badass scars and a good story to tell.

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### Author: ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/5 "2011-10-31T18:38:23Z")

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Vampirism requires the exchange of blood over a period of time to induce.

Lycanthropism mainfests at the next lunar cycle, but I am fairly sure that death prevents the expression of any symptoms.

Zombie bites cause death very quickly, and then the virus reanimates the corpse to act as a distribution vector.

So clearly, in a multiple attack situation, the victim will most likely become a member of the shambling zombie horde. (Next full moon may be interesting, though.)

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### Author: ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/6 "2011-10-31T19:27:14Z")

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As **DrFidelius** said, the vampire hasn’t done enough to make you a vampire (although the “over a period of time” part varies).

The question is whether the werewolf healing factor kicks in before you get turned into a zombie. You’ll either become a werewolf and shrug off the zombie bite or you’ll die and become an ordinary zombie.

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### Author: ![Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim_r.mortiss/32/142_2.png) [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_R.Mortiss)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/7 "2011-10-31T21:47:34Z")

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The “Underworld” series of movies explores what happens when you combine Vampirism and Lycanthropism. Maybe in a future installment they’ll add in Zombieism for the perfect storm!

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### Author: ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/8 "2011-10-31T22:05:16Z")

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> [@Grumman](#):
>
> As **DrFidelius** said, the vampire hasn’t done enough to make you a vampire (although the “over a period of time” part varies).
> 
> The question is whether the werewolf healing factor kicks in before you get turned into a zombie. You’ll either become a werewolf and shrug off the zombie bite or you’ll die and become an ordinary zombie.

I’m pretty sure that there is a latency period of about four weeks before the lycanthropy kicks in, but I must admit to being behind in the literature. Last I heard, a theriomorph only has the accelerated healing factor when in beast form (during the full moon) and is only human-normal (maybe bad-ass normal) the rest of the month. I am open to being corrected, with proper citations of peer-reviewed literature.

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### Author: ![The\_Man\_In\_Black](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bcef8e/32.png) [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_In_Black)
#### Post date: [October 31, 2011, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/9 "2011-10-31T22:14:55Z")

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> [@AtomicDog](#):
>
> Bites you at the same time.
> 
> Assuming you get away, what happens?

You need to tell us about each of the creatures first. Is it a Buffy type Vampire? An Underworld type? Etc.

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### Author: ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/10 "2011-11-01T00:52:03Z")

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You become a Jefferson Starship.

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### Author: ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/11 "2011-11-01T04:05:55Z")

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You can have the [lycanthrope](http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/lycanthrope.htm) template and either the [vampire](http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/vampire.htm) or [zombie](http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/zombie.htm) template on a creature, but only if you apply the lycanthrope template first, because the lycanthrope template can only be applied to a humanoid or giant, and vampire and zombie both change the base creature’s type to undead. You can’t have both the vampire and zombie templates, since neither one can be applied to an undead (vampire is applied to a humanoid or monstrous humanoid, and zombie is applied to any corporeal non-undead creature with a skeletal system). So whichever of those templates you acquired first would make you ineligible for the other one.

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### Author: ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/12 "2011-11-01T04:24:30Z")

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You’re subject to a spell that can only be broken by a priest, a minister and a rabbi.

In a bar.

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### Author: ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/13 "2011-11-01T05:05:28Z")

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A vampire, a werewolf, and a zombie walk into a bar. The vampire orders a bloody Mary, the werewolf orders a Coors Light(Silver Bullet, ya know) and the zombie stabs the bartender in the head with a straw.

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### Author: ![drastic\_quench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e36b37/32.png) [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/14 "2011-11-01T06:01:58Z")

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If I was writing the story, lycanthropy wins out because it keeps you alive while the other two are death-based. You’d come close to death, but heal and become a werewolf.

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### Author: ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/15 "2011-11-01T06:31:26Z")

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A vampire, a werewolf and a zombie walk into a bar, because shambling hunger-driven undead creatures of the night are too stupid to watch where they’re going . . .

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### Author: ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/16 "2011-11-01T08:41:32Z")

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Forgive me for intruding in this thread where I have no business . . . I don’t follow these kinds of horror stories much . . .

I am wondering, is there something particularly bad about being a werewolf?

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### Author: ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/17 "2011-11-01T09:19:06Z")

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D’oh! Joke already taken.

In that case, a “serious” answer. Zombification would triumph over all others.

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### Author: ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/18 "2011-11-01T09:23:38Z")

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> [@Senegoid](#):
>
> I am wondering, is there something particularly bad about being a werewolf?

Waking up one morning with your face covered in the blood of a half-eaten child?

You’ve basically got two types of werewolf: modern hippy werewolves, and the originals. The former might be a furry’s wet dream, but the latter means a few times every month you turn into an amoral monster.

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### Author: ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/19 "2011-11-01T10:17:52Z")

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> [@Senegoid](#):
>
> Forgive me for intruding in this thread where I have no business . . . I don’t follow these kinds of horror stories much . . .
> 
> I am wondering, is there something particularly bad about being a werewolf?

The whole going-feral-and-cannibalistic-without-any-control-whenever-there’s-a-full-moon thing could be considered somewhat bad, yes. And of course, the origins of the myth have a lot to do with grisly murder and/or rape - many historians and folklorists have attributed vampire and werewolf legends to dark age hick explanations for actual serial killers’ sprees, so there’s that. Finally, from an allegorical or symbolic point of view the myth of the werewolf is “man pursuing his basest urges to the point of losing his humanity” written large.  
They’re not \*supposed \*to be cool, is what I mean.

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### Author: ![Quimby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/22d042/32.png) [@Quimby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quimby)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2011, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-vampire-a-werewolf-and-a-zombie/601404/20 "2011-11-01T13:58:43Z")

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> [@Senegoid](#):
>
> Forgive me for intruding in this thread where I have no business . . . I don’t follow these kinds of horror stories much . . .
> 
> I am wondering, is there something particularly bad about being a werewolf?

I would imagine there are two types of Werewolves, the kind that get off on the freedom and seeming lack of responsibility for their actions and the ones who feel guilty for the horrible things they do when they are turned. For the former, it’s a blessing; for the the latter, it’s a curse.

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