# A WARNING For The Guys..... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 4, 2004, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633 "2004-06-04T15:15:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/161 "2004-06-08T18:56:57Z")
I’m not sure we’re talking about the same girl here, because I would have sworn she wore blue velvet. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/162 "2004-06-08T19:00:54Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > I’m not sure we’re talking about the same girl here, because I would have sworn she wore blue velvet. :thinks of Dennis Hopper at his weirdest: :winces: :hides under desk & cries softly: ---
**Author:** ![Algernon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a183cd/32.png) [@Algernon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algernon)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/163 "2004-06-08T19:11:20Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > I would have sworn she wore blue velvet. Well I drove her to my boarding house and I took her up to my room, and I went to turn on the only light to brighten up the gloom, but she said please leave the light on, I don’t mind the dark. So, I don’t recall what she wore because of the dark, but she smelled of incense and peppermint, the color of time. ---
**Author:** ![Zakalwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zakalwe/32/270_2.png) [@Zakalwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zakalwe)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/164 "2004-06-08T19:14:06Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > I’m not sure we’re talking about the same girl here, because I would have sworn she wore blue velvet. And she walked like a woman and talked like a man and you drank champagne and danced all night under electric candlelight. ---
**Author:** ![Algernon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a183cd/32.png) [@Algernon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algernon)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/165 "2004-06-08T19:42:40Z")
> [@Algernon](#): > > …but she said please leave the light on, I don’t mind the dark. [drat] I can’t believe I screwed up those lyrics to the point of them being illogical… should be "please leave the light _off_, I don’t mind the dark. [/drat] ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/166 "2004-06-08T19:44:23Z")
> [@Zakalwe](#): > > And she walked like a woman and talked like a man and you drank champagne and danced all night under electric candlelight. Dude, looks like a lady. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/167 "2004-06-08T20:03:00Z")
well, you know the path was deep and wide from footsteps leading to her cabin. Above the door there hung a scarlet lamp. And late at night, a hand would knock, and there would stand a stranger. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/168 "2004-06-08T20:24:31Z")
Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? Voulez-vous coucher avec moi? ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/169 "2004-06-08T21:22:07Z")
Roxanne, you don’t have to put on the red light. Those days are over, you don’t have to sell your body to the night. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/170 "2004-06-08T21:30:05Z")
After the party You took me back to your parlour. A little nervous laughter Locking the door. My stockings fall Onto the floor. Desperate for more. ---
**Author:** ![Algernon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a183cd/32.png) [@Algernon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algernon)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/171 "2004-06-08T21:34:52Z")
Mama told me not to come! ---
**Author:** ![Suse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Suse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suse)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/172 "2004-06-08T21:38:13Z")
I was drunk the day my Mama got out of prison. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/173 "2004-06-08T21:44:36Z")
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be cowboys. Cuz their never at home and their always alone, even with someone they love. ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/174 "2004-06-08T21:49:34Z")
I know this chick, but… I loved her, and she loved him. And he loved somebody else! You just can’t win. And so it goes, 'till the day you die. This thing called love, it’s gonna make you cry. Well, I’ve had the browns, the blues, and the pinks. But all I gotta say is: Love stinks! ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/175 "2004-06-08T22:13:47Z")
> [@Loopydude](#): > > …Love stinks! [That it does.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=4930121&postcount=16) [Nelson]HA-ha![/Nelson] ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/176 "2004-06-08T22:22:24Z")
> [@Loopydude](#): > > Love stinks! I hear you. I can see her lyin’ back in her satin dress in a room where ya do what ya don’t confess. She’s been lookin’ like a queen in a sailor’s dream, and she don’t always say what she really means. Sometimes I think it’s a shame when I get feelin’ better when I’m feelin’ no pain. I can picture every move that a man could make. Getting lost in her lovin’ is your first mistake. I can see her lookin’ fast in her faded jeans. She’s a hard lovin’ woman, got me feelin’ mean. ---
**Author:** ![Suse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Suse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suse)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/177 "2004-06-08T22:23:30Z")
Okay, so love stinks, garbage stinks, some people think the Yankees stink. But I want to think happy thoughts, thoughts of a time when I learn to work the saxophone. I play just what I feel, drink scotch whiskey all night long, and die behind the wheel. Oops. That stinks, too. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/178 "2004-06-08T22:46:37Z")
Just don’t come home with whiskey on your breath and lovin’ on your mind. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/179 "2004-06-08T22:57:47Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > Just don’t come home with whiskey on your breath and lovin’ on your mind. But what if I met a gin-soaked barroom queen in Memphis, and I went upstairs with her and there were all these _roses_ in the room, and I got an allergic reaction and needed someone to help clear my sinuses? ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2004, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633/180 "2004-06-08T23:39:54Z")
> [@Biffy the Elephant Shrew](#): > > But what if I met a gin-soaked barroom queen in Memphis, and I went upstairs with her and there were all these _roses_ in the room, and I got an allergic reaction and needed someone to help clear my sinuses? Hey, don’t joke! I was admiring the bright lights of Memphis and the Commodore hotel, and underneath a streetlamp I met a southern belle. It was all chickens & lambs after that. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-warning-for-the-guys/248633.md?page=10)