# ABC's film critic walks out of Clerks II screening **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 19, 2006, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196 "2006-07-19T17:16:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/1 "2006-07-19T17:16:57Z")
Apparently, you can’t talk about sexing up a donkey in front of Joel Siegel, lest his delicate sensitivities get assaulted. [From the NY Post Page Six:](http://www.nypost.com/gossip/pagesix/pagesix_u.htm) > [@](#): > > “Time to go!” roared Siegel to his fellow critics. “First movie I’ve walked out of in 30 [bleeping] years!” His tirade came 40 minutes into the long-awaited Weinstein Company sequel to Smith’s 1994 cult classic about two foul-mouthed Long Island convenience store clerks who razz customers and goof off. > > In the scene that sent Siegel to the exit, the characters graphically discuss hiring a woman to perform sexual favors on a donkey. Siegel told Page Six: “It was so foul and mean and repulsive. I finally realized I could not say anything positive . . . I wasn’t ready for this kind of smut . . . I hope he doesn’t make any more movies.” Smith was less than amused with Siegel’s display and wrote a response on [his MySpace blog.](http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=63831867&blogID=146000943&MyToken=b1ba1765-d854-4607-8d1b-d875182a20ee) Some highlights: > [@](#): > > I mean, it’s Joel Siegel, for Christ’s sake. As Paul Thomas Anderson once said of the man, getting a bad review from Siegel is like a badge of honor. This is the guy who stole his mustachioed critic shtick from Gene Shalit years ago, and still refuses to give it back. This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on being “punny” - that is, he likes to add his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay into the reviews he writes/gives. > > For “Pirates 2”, he made us all titter with “Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun”. > > For Pixar’s lastest, he made us squeal with delight when he wrote “Wheelie Good Time for ‘Cars’”. > > Can you believe he somehow not only made us laugh, but also think, when he challenged our perception with “X-Men’ Fails to X-cite”? > > I mean, Fozzy fucking Bear laughs at this guy (AT, mind you, not WITH). A bit childish in response, but funny. What I do agree with is this: > [@](#): > > However, I CAN fault him for the manner in which he left the screening. > > Check this shit out: roughly forty minutes into the flick, when Randal orders up the third act donkey show, Siegel bellowed to his fellow critics "Time to go!‘’ and "This is the first movie I’ve walked out of in 30 fucking years!‘’ > > Now, I don’t need Joel Siegel to suck my dick the way he apparently sucks M. Night’s, gushing over his flick before he’s even seen it; but shit, man - how about a little common fucking courtesy? > Never mind the fact that when you’re paid to watch movies for a living and the only tasks required of you are to a) sit through said movies and b) write your thoughts about them before your deadline, walking out before a movie’s over is pretty unprofessional. and > [@](#): > > Cardinal rule of movie-going: shut your fucking mouth while the movie’s playing. They even ask you to do so in the pre-show run-up to every flick (“Cell phones and pagers off, no talking during the show”). This guy went beyond talking, even; he was making a spectacle of himself as he left. I’ve now spoken to three folks in attendance last night, and all have said that Siegel WANTED everyone to know how disgusted he was, and that he was leaving. If you want to share your displeasure with everyone, that’s fine, dude; just do it AFTER the movie, not during. Some folks were enjoying themselves. I don’t come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like “‘Shark Tale’ Is a Halibut Good Time”; so don’t fuck with my stuff WHILE IT’S STILL SCREENING. Anywho, I’m very much inclined to agree with Smith. If Joel was so upset about the movie, quietly get up leave- and that’s assuming it REALLY assaulted his delicate sensibilities. In reality, he is a movie critic and he needs to sit his fluffy butt in the chair and suffer through whatever is put before him. After all, that’s his job. Good for Kevin Smith. Just thought I’d share. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/2 "2006-07-19T17:22:33Z")
Joel Siegel is a dick, and this just proves it. Totally unprofessional behavior. I’ll think I’ll see _Clerks 2_ three times now, just to piss him off. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/3 "2006-07-19T17:28:47Z")
I think I’m going to see Cars. I mean, apparently, it’s a Wheelie good time!!11LOL!1!! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Jayrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Jayrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayrot)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/4 "2006-07-19T17:53:40Z")
I’ve got to agree with KS on this one. Walking out of a bad movie is one thing. Causing a scene and ruining it for others makes you no different from the godforsaken asshats who [answer cellphones during the movie](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=378108). ---
**Author:** ![Malodorous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Malodorous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malodorous)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/5 "2006-07-19T18:07:53Z")
This is what, the sixth movie KS has made with the same characters. How did a famous movie critic not know going in that this film was going to be gross. ---
**Author:** ![Autumn\_Almanac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d26b3c/32.png) [@Autumn\_Almanac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autumn_Almanac)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/6 "2006-07-19T18:08:44Z")
The _mention_ of bestiality in an R-rated comedy is enough of a shock to send this guy storming out of the theater? Which movies _has_ he been watching for the past ten years? ---
**Author:** ![Jayrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Jayrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayrot)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/7 "2006-07-19T18:25:19Z")
[QUOTE=wm–] The _mention_ of bestiality in an R-rated comedy is enough of a shock to send this guy storming out of the theater? Which movies _has_ he been watching for the past ten years? [/QUOTE] Cars, POTC2, Shark Tale, and X-Men…apparently. The only problem here is that there was no easy pun with the title of Clerks 2. ---
**Author:** ![Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f0a364/32.png) [@Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rube_E.Tewesday)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/8 "2006-07-19T18:26:03Z")
[QUOTE=wm–] The _mention_ of bestiality in an R-rated comedy is enough of a shock to send this guy storming out of the theater? Which movies _has_ he been watching for the past ten years? [/QUOTE] That’s what I’m wondering. In the course of his lengthy career, he must have encountered a lot of stuff smuttier that what you’d encounter in Kevin Smith dialogue. Do these guys have some kind of history? ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/9 "2006-07-19T18:27:32Z")
[QUOTE=Jayrot] Cars, POTC2, Shark Tale, and X-Men…apparently. The only problem here is that there was no easy pun with the title of Clerks 2. [/QUOTE] As Smith says on his blog, Joel could have gone with, “Clerks II? More like: Jerks, too!” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/10 "2006-07-19T18:30:40Z")
Does Joel Siegel still plan on writing a review? It seems dishonest to put forth what you claim is a review of an entire movie if you’ve only see the first 40 minutes… ---
**Author:** ![Jayrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Jayrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayrot)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/11 "2006-07-19T18:33:27Z")
Siegel’s article 2 years from now: **Oh yeah, well the Clerks store called and they’re running out of you!** ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/12 "2006-07-19T18:34:35Z")
_::hollering at the top of my lungs::_ I can’t watch this movie! There’s a fucking profanity in it! ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/13 "2006-07-19T18:36:23Z")
I like Rex Reed. ---
**Author:** ![Gene\_Frenkle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Gene\_Frenkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gene_Frenkle)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/14 "2006-07-19T18:38:06Z")
I can’t be the only one who finds Kevin Smith films to be, well, lame, can I? I know to his fans, he can do no wrong. He can make the Ben Affleck movie, a sickly sweet desperate attempt to get a commercial hit which by its mere existence goes against everything his previous films were about. And no, I don’t blame a director for courting the mass audiences, but Ben Affleck as a doting dad to an adorable nine year old? Very sad. And since that one explicably bombed, he goes back to re-release his most critically acclaimed film. Is he out of ideas? Are the Rolling Stones releasing “I can’t get no satisfaction 2006” next month? To me it seems potty mouth humor is all this guy has going for him. Great plots? no. Fully developed characters? Uh- no. At the risk of being reemed, I don’t see how a guy like this is thought of in such high esteem on a board like this. Granted, the frat boys who fill the psych auditoriums to here him speak, you at least see why they like him. But otherwise intelligent people who fawn over him and at the same time lambaste similar product like Friends is beyond me. Potty mouth with intelligent humor behind it (cf Family Guy) is always welcome. Am I missing the really intelligent jokes in these films? Having Jay ask a girl to lick his asshole- where exactly is the humor in that, to anyone over 12? Oh I forgot- Clerks is cool, because it’s how people really act and talk. Whatever that means. ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/15 "2006-07-19T18:40:02Z")
Please people, it’s too easy to judge Joel Siegal, but until you’ve walked in his shoes and know the whole story of him, Eeyore, and a bottle of Astroglide™, I think it’s best to keep your comments to yourself. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/16 "2006-07-19T18:42:06Z")
> [@Joel Siegel](#): > > “It was so foul and mean and repulsive. I finally realized I could not say anything positive . . . I wasn’t ready for this kind of smut . . . I hope he doesn’t make any more movies.” For some reason, this reminds me of Roger Ebert’s review of _Pink Flamingos_ (which was, of course, also a very dirty movie): “I am not giving a star rating to _Pink Flamingos_, because stars seem not to apply. It should be considered not as a film but as a fact, or perhaps an object.” Perhaps Joel Siegel should steal that line for his film. (And professional reviewers walking out of movies is nothing new- Rev. Tom Carder of CAP Alert fame was somehow able to sit through _South Park_, but walked out of other R-rated movies.) ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/17 "2006-07-19T18:45:15Z")
That should read Joel Siegel’s _review_, of course. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/18 "2006-07-19T18:55:49Z")
[Siegel on Opie and Anthony. . .along with Kevin Smith.](http://www.viewaskew.com/kevin/joelsiegel.mp3) I don’t think Siegel realizes he’s talking to Kevin Smith. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/19 "2006-07-19T19:01:05Z")
[QUOTE=Gene Frenkle] I can’t be the only one who finds Kevin Smith films to be, well, lame, can I? I know to his fans, he can do no wrong. He can make the Ben Affleck movie, a sickly sweet desperate attempt to get a commercial hit which by its mere existence goes against everything his previous films were about. And no, I don’t blame a director for courting the mass audiences, but Ben Affleck as a doting dad to an adorable nine year old? Very sad. And since that one explicably bombed, he goes back to re-release his most critically acclaimed film. …snip… [/QUOTE] Please give us Kevin Smith fans a break; very few of us liked Jersey Girl. The movie blew chunks. Saying he made a Ben Affleck movie sounds a little silly though considering how many films he has made that included Ben. Kevin Smith helped finance “Good Will Hunting”. They are good friends. If your point is Kevin Smith failed in his attempt to make a mainstream movie, that is true. It sounds more like you are lightly informed on his works and just want to insult him and his fans. > [@](#): > > His tirade came 40 minutes into the long-awaited Weinstein Company sequel to Smith’s 1994 cult classic about two foul-mouthed \*\*Long Island convenience store clerks \*\* who razz customers and goof off. My Bolding, is it Joel Siegel that is this ignorant of the movies that he failed to realize that Clerks and all things Kevin Smith are New Jersey oriented? Jim ---
**Author:** ![Gene\_Frenkle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Gene\_Frenkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gene_Frenkle)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2006, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196/20 "2006-07-19T19:23:53Z")
No no, I’m not a flamer- check my previous postings. I may have came off sounding like that- I aplogize. My post was legitimate. There seems to be a legion of intelligent Kevin Smith fans, and I just don’t get it. If your smart friends tell you to watch American Dad, (early) Simpsons, Spinal Tap, Holy Grail, etc., that they are really funny, then you watch them- you see what they meant. When otherwise brilliant people tell me about Kevin Smith films, I’ve watched them all- I just don’t see these on the same level. Or are they even supposed to be on this level? I am honestly curious about what attracts intelligent people to a Kevin Smith film. No flaming, no offense to anyone- I really am curious. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abcs-film-critic-walks-out-of-clerks-ii-screening/365196.md?page=2)