# Abolish apostrophes and commas! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 27, 2010, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967 "2010-05-27T16:39:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/1 "2010-05-27T16:39:33Z")
Lets abolish all apostrophes and commas. This would be a better world without them. We worry over them and what do they give us in return? Clarity? Hardly. If one doesnt know how to use them they make a person feel stupid and inadequate (although most people who dont know how to use them dont seem to give a rats ass) and if you do know how to use them you are always on edge braced to see them being abused. No more tensing up over “it’s” v. “its.” In the case of “you’re” v. “your” all that I would have to be annoyed about is the spelling. Apostrophes and commas use up ink and give nothing back but anxiety insecurity and surges in stomach acid. I say out with them! ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/2 "2010-05-27T16:47:17Z")
Apostrophes are easy, and commas are not that much more difficult. From what I can tell, people just aren’t taught how to use either one, so they make assumptions about how they are supposed to be used. And you can’t have it both ways. If people don’t give a rat’s ass about proper usage, they can’t also be stressed out about usage. I’d rather we keep them and teach people correctly instead of abolishing them and making it harder to understand written communication. ---
**Author:** ![Woeg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Woeg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Woeg)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/3 "2010-05-27T16:50:52Z")
I wrote a poem about commas, sort of… **Punctuational Perversity** I just, can’t seem, to keep, from adding commas to, my work; Pausing, every other word, like freakin’, Captain, Kirk. Punctuational perversity, pervades, within my mind; I have, to see, a comma at the end of, every line. If not, a pause, Then a full, stop, a, period-ication, A semi-colon, dot dot dot, perhaps a hy- phenation. And so, dear reader, please, forgive, when such, said things, invade; it’s just, that, punctuational, perversity, pervades. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/4 "2010-05-27T16:52:47Z")
Despite my occasional tendencies toward grammar fascism, I could get behind losing the apostrophe; it’s happening anyway. But touch not the comma, except to encourage more use of the dash and the parenthesis. All three add a great deal of clarity. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/5 "2010-05-27T16:53:26Z")
That is lovely. I’d like to hear it set to music. Possibly with the sound of a metronome in the background. But a hesitating metronome. ETA: Dashes, yes. Like Emily Dickinson. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Onimous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Ann\_Onimous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Onimous)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/6 "2010-05-27T16:56:25Z")
My first name has an apostrophe in it. I have a vested interest in keeping them around. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/7 "2010-05-27T16:59:39Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Despite my occasional tendencies toward grammar fascism, I could get behind losing the apostrophe; it’s happening anyway.\ I’ve been noticing this in sporting news - the possessive apostrophe has pretty much disappeared. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/8 "2010-05-27T16:59:47Z")
Compare: Let’s eat, Grandpa! Let’s eat Grandpa! Commas: preventing cannibalism since Aldus Manutius. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/9 "2010-05-27T18:03:16Z")
Excellent point, Matt. Okay… some commas allowed. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/10 "2010-05-27T18:09:21Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Excellent point, Matt. > > Okay… some commas allowed. Your right. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/11 "2010-05-27T18:46:57Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > Compare: > > Let’s eat, Grandpa! > Let’s eat Grandpa! > > Commas: preventing cannibalism since Aldus Manutius. Only if Grandpa is delicious 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2010, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/12 "2010-05-27T19:47:30Z")
Using … is always better… when you type. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/13 "2010-05-28T17:55:41Z")
> [@Woeg](#): > > I wrote a poem about commas, sort of… > > **Punctuational Perversity** > > I just, > can’t seem, > to keep, > from adding commas to, > my work; > Pausing, > every other word, > like freakin’, > Captain, > Kirk. > Punctuational perversity, > pervades, > within my mind; > I have, > to see, > a comma > at the end of, > every line. > If not, > a pause, > Then a full, > stop, a, > period-ication, > A semi-colon, > dot dot dot, > perhaps a hy- > phenation. > And so, > dear reader, > please, > forgive, > when such, > said things, > invade; > it’s just, > that, > punctuational, > perversity, > pervades. That was great. And when I got to the line about Captain Kirk, I started hearing it in William Shatner’s voice. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/14 "2010-05-28T18:09:41Z")
> [@Markxxx](#): > > Only if Grandpa is delicious 🙂 Arent most grandpas? ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/15 "2010-05-28T18:21:03Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Your right. My right? I thought you meant _your right_. Christ, we’ll never get the new sofa up the stairs at this rate. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/16 "2010-05-28T18:23:38Z")
Christ well never get the new sofa up the stairs at this rate? ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/17 "2010-05-28T19:36:53Z")
Your right! ---
**Author:** ![Doctor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Doctor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/18 "2010-05-28T21:41:36Z")
I’m afraid that we might need to do something which has obviously never been tried before – teach people how to read and write properly. I know this is a shocking concept that has actually never been attempted before (I don’t consider any of the “grammar” lessons I had in school to be the list bit useful in teaching proper grammar). Someone who is not a grammarian actually needs to determine how to teach reading and writing without making it so obtuse and incomprehensible that kids just give up out of frustration. I don’t need to diagram a damn sentence. I don’t need to know about all of the obscure grammatical terms. Just tell me how to use the words correctly and where they make sense in modern American English (insert appropriate language for your country in place of American English) and let’s get on with it and **read**. That is how I learned most of my English – by reading books. I know this is another shocking and unheard of concept – but, it does work. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/19 "2010-05-28T22:16:33Z")
> [@Juliana](#): > > My first name has an apostrophe in it. I have a vested interest in keeping them around. Um…is that apostrophe in your first name actually supposed to be a accent mark, by any chance? ---
**Author:** ![Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/848f3c/32.png) [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuzzy_Dunlop)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2010, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967/20 "2010-05-28T22:26:52Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Um…is that apostrophe in your first name actually supposed to be a accent mark, by any chance? I wouldn’t jump to that conclusion. Grammatical marks are surprisingly common in first names. My own has an exclamation mark in it. It’s to make sure people know I’m important. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/abolish-apostrophes-and-commas/540967.md?page=2)