# Actresses whose careers you'd like to see tank so they would do porn **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 15, 2004, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222 "2004-07-15T05:28:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/1 "2004-07-15T05:28:09Z")
OK, this isn’t exactly a NICE thread, but I suspect it’s a thought a lot of people who watch movies have had: “God, she/he is so hot! I sure with her/his career would tank so I could see her/him naked and doing some heavy-duty sex scenes.” OK, so maybe this thread should be labelled “Unworthy Thoughts 101” but I still think this is a pretty common thought among movie buffs. (And I sure hope I get some responses on this thread). I’ve had this thought about Laura Prepon, Katherine Heigl, Janeane Garafolo, Megan Pryce, Laura Kightlinger and, well … a lot of others. I know it’s wrong to hope an actress or comedian’s career tanks just so I can see her naked and doing the four-humped armadillo, but … there it is. (Why am I so sure this thread will have NO responses?) ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/2 "2004-07-15T05:47:08Z")
…Janeane Garafolo…?! ---
**Author:** ![xvxdarkknightxvx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/34f0e0/32.png) [@xvxdarkknightxvx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xvxdarkknightxvx)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/3 "2004-07-15T05:57:55Z")
> [@Bryan Ekers](#): > > …Janeane Garafolo…?! **…Janeane Garafolo…!!!** Umm…is this just a “Which actresses are hot enough to be worthy of porn?” thread? If so, Britney Spears, Heather Locklear (sure she’s old, but still very hot), Cameron Diaz, Keira Knightly, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Garner, and Brittany Murphy. I’m sure there’s plenty more I’m forgetting. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/4 "2004-07-15T06:21:17Z")
Jennifer Tilly. :drooling smilie: ---
**Author:** ![Lando\_Griffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f17d59/32.png) [@Lando\_Griffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lando_Griffin)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/5 "2004-07-15T06:42:08Z")
> [@Evil Captor](#): > > I know it’s wrong to hope an actress or comedian’s career tanks just so I can see her naked and doing the four-humped armadillo, but … there it is. Well, I don’t believe I’m familiar with _that_ particular position. :dubious: 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Brutus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Brutus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brutus)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/6 "2004-07-15T06:52:49Z")
This thread would be considerably shorter if you asked what actress _wouldn’t_ you want to see in a porn film. They tend to build 'em all pretty hot these days, you know. ---
**Author:** ![xvxdarkknightxvx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/34f0e0/32.png) [@xvxdarkknightxvx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xvxdarkknightxvx)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/7 "2004-07-15T07:08:35Z")
> [@Brutus](#): > > This thread would be considerably shorter if you asked what actress _wouldn’t_ you want to see in a porn film. They tend to build 'em all pretty hot these days, you know. Kathy Bates. :shudder: ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/8 "2004-07-15T07:13:42Z")
> [@Bryan Ekers](#): > > …Janeane Garafolo…?! I happen to think she’s a fox. Not in a pornstar way, but more in a hottest girl at the coffee shop way. ---
**Author:** ![AveDementia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@AveDementia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AveDementia)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/9 "2004-07-15T07:16:39Z")
Britney Spears? [Ewww,](http://www.stereogum.com/img/whitetrashbritney2.jpg) [have you seen her lately?](http://www.stereogum.com/img/whitetrashbritney.jpg) And if those don’t work, they’re both [here.](http://www.stereogum.com/archives/000669.html) And I’d like Jessica Simpson’s career to tank. Not cause of the porn, which I’m sure her dad would watch, but just because she’s such a vapid bitch. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/10 "2004-07-15T07:34:20Z")
> [@AveDementia](#): > > [have you seen her lately?](http://www.stereogum.com/img/whitetrashbritney.jpg) Oh yea…( o )( o ) 😃 > [@](#): > > And I’d like Jessica Simpson’s career to tank. Not cause of the porn, which I’m sure her dad would watch, but just because she’s such a vapid bitch. Huh? I know nothing about Jessica Simpson except that they got her to act dumber than she really is for some stupid show that I’ll never watch and that she’s not nearly as hot as everyone makes her out to be. Is her dad some kind of creep or something? ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/11 "2004-07-15T07:56:31Z")
> [@AveDementia](#): > > [have you seen her lately?](http://www.stereogum.com/img/whitetrashbritney.jpg) She looks frighteningly like my ex-stepmother there, just younger. ---
**Author:** ![AveDementia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@AveDementia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AveDementia)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/12 "2004-07-15T07:58:09Z")
Yes. The whole family is seriously lacking in boundaries, but Papa Simpson has a huge obsession with Jessica, her body (especially her breasts), and her sex life. Let’s see- just off the top of my head: \*gave Jessica a promise ring and said he would be the man in her life and “fill her up” until she got married \*hovered over Jess and hubby Nick making out on a bed for a video shoot, then afterwards commented happily that Jess could now have sex “until she’s blue in the face” (among other statements about Jess and her sex life) \*repeatedly talks about how sexy and voluptous she is, and (along with Ma) likes to recount how the Christian music companies didn’t want her because she was big breasted (a lie in my opinion, I’ve seen early performance photos, she was wearing a bra-sized shirt under a see-thru rain jacket- that is NOT modest Christian garb) \*stood a few feet away and watched Jess jump out of a cake wearing stripper gear and give Nick (her husband) a lap dance \*when he accidentally walked in on Jess, her sis, and a friend sunbathing topless, Mama Simpson commented that it was his lucky day That’s just from a moment of consideration. Check out the re-caps of the Newlyweds show at Television Without Pity if you want more examples. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/13 "2004-07-15T08:20:23Z")
I know it’s a cliche…ending up doing porn…but I have to ask, how often does this actually happen? I know of stars having hidden (or not so hidden) porn tapes in their _past_ , who has, in fact, been famous and _ended up_ in porn? Just wondering. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/14 "2004-07-15T10:00:44Z")
Well, there was John Gielgud. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Death](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecccb3/32.png) [@Evil\_Death](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Death)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/15 "2004-07-15T10:26:53Z")
> [@xvxdarkknightxvx](#): > > Cameron Diaz, Cameron Diaz has already done porn. ---
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/16 "2004-07-15T10:40:09Z")
> [@betenoir](#): > > I know it’s a cliche…ending up doing porn…but I have to ask, how often does this actually happen? I know of stars having hidden (or not so hidden) porn tapes in their _past_ , who has, in fact, been famous and _ended up_ in porn? Just wondering. [Tanya Roberts](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000617/bio). She was a Charlie’s Angel girl, then a Beastmaster Girl, then Sheena. A few failed flicks later and next thing she’s doing the beast with two backs and playing skin piccolo direct to video. ---
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/17 "2004-07-15T10:42:41Z")
Oh yeah, and I don’t want \*\* Janeane Garafolo’s\*\* career to tank, but I wouldn’t mind seeing her in a super sweaty sex scene or two (or twelve). ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/18 "2004-07-15T11:39:32Z")
> [@Bryan Ekers](#): > > …Janeane Garafolo…?! Oh, yeah. In both her and Kightlinger’s case, they get stuck in some low-budget Skinamax porn flick and do the sex scenes, but are allowed to ad-lib as much as they want because the director recognizes that his writer isn’t nearly as good as they are. (OK, it’s a fantasy.) I see it as being sexy and funny as hell. YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/19 "2004-07-15T11:41:37Z")
> [@Lando Griffin](#): > > Well, I don’t believe I’m familiar with _that_ particular position. :dubious: > > 😛 A phrase borrowed from [Joe Bob Briggs.](http://www.joebobbriggs.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222/20 "2004-07-15T11:43:15Z")
> [@Brutus](#): > > This thread would be considerably shorter if you asked what actress _wouldn’t_ you want to see in a porn film. They tend to build 'em all pretty hot these days, you know. To make a distinction here, which actresses whom you think are pretty good actresses are ALSO porn-worthy, leading to unworthy thoughts about their careers tanking. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/actresses-whose-careers-youd-like-to-see-tank-so-they-would-do-porn/255222.md?page=2)