# Adventures in editing movie language for TV! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 15, 2005, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900 "2005-01-15T20:02:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f19dbf/32.png) [@Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Only_Mostly_Dead)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2005, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/1 "2005-01-15T20:02:41Z")
Caught some of **The Big Lebowski** today on Comedy Central, the point where they visit the kid and smash up the sports car. The part where Walter yells “This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass.” The part where Comedy Central dubbed it as “This is what happens when you fight a stranger in the Alps.” Needless to say, the part where I cracked up laughing louder than I ever have in the unedited version of the movie (except maybe during the first viewing). Share some more brilliance with me. ---
**Author:** ![Strinka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strinka/32/512_2.png) [@Strinka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strinka)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2005, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/2 "2005-01-15T20:32:47Z")
I thought ‘flipper’ instead of ‘finger’ was kind of funny in The Matrix. ---
**Author:** ![ErinPuff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dbc845/32.png) [@ErinPuff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ErinPuff)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2005, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/3 "2005-01-15T20:52:22Z")
The Breakfast Club is hilarious on TV because of the creative censoring. I can’t think of any examples at the moment, but some of it is quite… creative. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2005, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/4 "2005-01-15T20:57:14Z")
When I was a kid I watched _Smokey & the Bandit_ on network TV and was wondering why Jackie Gleason kept yelling “I’m gonna bah-be-cue yo’ head in molasses!” (the line is “barbecue yo’ aaaaassssssssss!”, so the “head in molasses” phrase had to be said much faster than the rest of the sentence). To me there’s only one acceptable way of editing speech for TV and that’s too delete (or bleep) the offensive word. Everybody knows what they’re saying, you’re not fooling anybody, and it’s much more natural to call somebody a “motherBLEEPer” than a “mother DUCK LOVER”. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/5 "2005-01-16T05:51:39Z")
Can’t compete with “Alps” but I was watching some terrible movie where they replaced “Kill your cracker ass” with “Kill you, crackerjack”. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/6 "2005-01-16T06:42:12Z")
In _The Usual Suspects_, during the police line-up scene, the line “mother fucking cock-sucker” was changed to “grandmother loving brother bugger.” That sounds dirtier than the actual line! ---
**Author:** ![Slacker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@Slacker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slacker)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/7 "2005-01-16T06:43:03Z")
My favorite was the ABC version of **Mallrats**. It was butchered to death, as you can imagine if you’ve seen the original. The one that stuck in my mind the most was Jay’s line toward the end of the movie when he subdued two game show contestands with marijuana. Standing over the two guys laying on the ground he originally says: “All it took was a fat chronic blunt!” On the ABC version, it becomes: “All it took was a fat karate punch!” ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/8 "2005-01-16T13:49:47Z")
The absolute classic is _Repo Man_, where every other word is ‘motherfucker’. On TV, it becomes ‘melon-farmer’. ---
**Author:** ![JoeSki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b487fb/32.png) [@JoeSki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoeSki)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/9 "2005-01-16T14:21:12Z")
Bullett Broof with Damon Waynes and Adam Sandler is worth watching once on VHS/DVD, and twice on TV just to see how much has been edited. About 1/3 of the dialogue is changed. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/10 "2005-01-16T17:03:30Z")
On TNT (TBS?), Bruce Willis’ line in _Die Hard_ became “Yippe-kai-yay, Mister Falcom!” Hilarious. The changes in _Fargo_ are awesome, too (“Frosted snow demons!”). I understand that the Coen brothers intentionally come up with weird alternative swear words, **Only Mostly Dead**. (BTW, “fight a stranger in the Alps”? Totally cracked me up.) ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/11 "2005-01-16T17:18:03Z")
My all-time favorite is in “Major League.” But it’s not so much that the word choice of the dubbed line is particularly amusing – Corbin Bernsen’s “Strike this motherfucker out!” becomes “Strike this guy out!” – as it is the hilarious mismatch in tone between Bernsen and whoever they brought in to say “guy.” It REALLY sticks out. Honestly, whoever they brought in sounds black, and Bernsen’s a white dude. That’s not to say that black people can’t do impressions of white people, because Jamie Foxx does an impression of Ronald Reagan that is stunning, but if you’re going to bring in a black dude to dub for a white person, be sure to tell the black dude to do his best white-person impression! Simply erasing the “fucker” half of “motherfucker” probably would have sounded a lot smoother. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/12 "2005-01-16T20:53:21Z")
The TV version of Al Pacino’s **Scarface** is pretty, um, creative in its use of language. The original conatins around 180 uses of the word fuck. ---
**Author:** ![chukhung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e79b87/32.png) [@chukhung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chukhung)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2005, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/13 "2005-01-16T23:53:45Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > The absolute classic is _Repo Man_, where every other word is ‘motherfucker’. On TV, it becomes ‘melon-farmer’. Indeed. I wish they’d release a “super-deluxe-extra-special-extended” edition DVD of _Repo Man_ that includes both the theatrical and the editied-for-television versions. They’re both great, each in their own way. “Flip you, melon-farmer!” ---
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2005, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/14 "2005-01-17T00:44:03Z")
Not quite on topic, in that it’s just a (rather amusing) error, but… I noticed last night that at one point in _Without a Clue_, one of the characters says, “Oh, blast!” … and the French subtitle says, “Une explosion!” ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2005, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/15 "2005-01-17T01:43:39Z")
_MST3K_ used to have a lot of fun of the bleeped out curses in their movies. ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2005, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/16 "2005-01-17T02:00:34Z")
The first time I saw Spike Lee’s _Do The Right Thing_ on TV, the part that launched me right from suspension of disbelief is where some brainless network twit decided that “Mickey-fickey” should be dubbed in to replace _motherfucker._ Imagine a bunch of middle aged unemployed brothers sitting on milk crates drinking beers and shooting the breeze saying, “Damn these Mickey-fickeying Koreans coming in here and taking our jobs.” Gah. Any hood rat with an ounce of street knowledge knows that the acceptable euphemism is “Mother Hubbard.” I know – it’s still corny – but at least that has some basis in reality! ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2005, 9:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/17 "2005-01-17T09:00:39Z")
TV broadcast of “Young Frankenstein.” Scene at the dinner table, where the monster’s dimensions are being discussed. Opines Terri Garr: “He would have an enormous personality.” Um, yeah… ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2005, 9:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/18 "2005-01-17T09:11:17Z")
Yeah, I watched it on TV a few months back and even mentioned it in my Livejournal. My transcription: > [@](#): > > You see what happens, Larry? You see what happens when you find a stranger in the alps? Larry, do you see what happens? Do you see what happens when you feed a stranger scrambled eggs? Surreal. ---
**Author:** ![Scoundrel\_Swanswater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dfb087/32.png) [@Scoundrel\_Swanswater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scoundrel_Swanswater)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2005, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/19 "2005-01-17T11:23:25Z")
> [@](#): > > The TV version of Al Pacino’s Scarface is pretty, um, creative in its use of language. The original conatins around 180 uses of the word fuck. The best one was the following exchange between Al Pacino and an INS officer : Original version : Where did you get that scar? Eating pussy? TV Version : Where did you get that scar? Eating pineapple? The funniest thing is that you can immediately tell somebody dubbed over it, because the voice is very different in the word pineapple. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2005, 11:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900/20 "2005-01-17T11:42:44Z")
Harvey Keitel asks “have you been funning my wife?” in the TV version of a movie whose name eludes me currently. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/adventures-in-editing-movie-language-for-tv/284900.md?page=2)