# Advice of a sexual nature **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 27, 2001, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975 "2001-10-27T17:20:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![charmaine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19adc/32.png) [@charmaine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/charmaine)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2001, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/21 "2001-10-27T22:30:11Z")
if you’re drunk, go the safe route: get up off the bed to get your clothes. very few people find a naked body falling off a bed charming. ---
**Author:** ![psychogumby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c0e974/32.png) [@psychogumby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychogumby)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/22 "2001-10-27T23:25:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by andygirl \* > \*\*lurk, go perform oral sex on a woman for a very long time and then look at yourself in a mirror. Your face looks like you’ve been eating glazed donuts in a very sloppy manner. > > Also, the towel can be very important if it’s that time of the month. \*\* a.k.a “The Dolmio Grin”. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2001, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/23 "2001-10-27T23:46:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by velouria \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Rysdad \* > > \*\*If you’re male, and have been chopping habaneros for salsa, wash hands before peeing. \*\* > > Assuming this is sex advice, my advice is stay the hell away from Rysdad. \*\* :eek: :o [Paul McCartney} “Golden showers fill your eyes…” [/Paul McCartney] What? ---
**Author:** ![Torgo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@Torgo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Torgo)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/24 "2001-10-28T01:13:42Z")
Keep away from the dog immediately afterward, unless you’re dressed. Our Floyd can’t get enough of the smell of sweet lovin’ and is prone to bury his nose (his **cold, wet nose** ) in my crotch as much as he can. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/25 "2001-10-28T02:22:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by andygirl \* > \*\*Also, the towel can be very important if it’s that time of the month. \*\* Hey, you don’t have to be from Detroit to know what Red Wings are… ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/26 "2001-10-28T03:11:50Z")
Speaking as a physician advocating both for the common good and your personal health, _please don’t engage in oral sex while driving_. **Remember, coming and going don’t mix!** ---
**Author:** ![Zyada](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zyada/32/3028_2.png) [@Zyada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zyada)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/27 "2001-10-28T03:16:32Z")
\ Hmmmm. Before oral sex, make sure your bladder isn’t full. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![bagkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ab992/32.png) [@bagkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bagkitty)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/28 "2001-10-28T04:51:28Z")
Never, ever allow someone to give you a blow job after the acid you dropped an hour earlier starts to kick in… it’s not painful, just very, very, very disturbing ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/29 "2001-10-28T05:03:32Z")
Lemme get this straight **bagkitty**. On which part of whose anatomy did you drop acid on and why wasn’t it pai. . . Oh, now I get it! ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/30 "2001-10-28T05:16:09Z")
[bubba] Make dang sure you tie that sheep up tight. Them hooves’ll cut ya when those back legs get ta kickin’. [/bubba] ---
**Author:** ![SweetLilKitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@SweetLilKitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SweetLilKitty)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/31 "2001-10-28T05:54:13Z")
My advice to you, my fellow dopers, would to not have sex with a virgin. Virgins have a habit of getting very clingy and then after some time of dating they want to experience other people, but only because you have. BUT, they still love you and you are the whole freakin’ world to them. No offense to anybody who is the big V or anything, there is nothing wrong with that. However, “Virgin Syndrome” does exist, and someday I’m going to make a case study out of it. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Lao](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2bfe46/32.png) [@Dr.Lao](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Lao)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/32 "2001-10-28T05:56:56Z")
Dopers, please do not follow **SweetLilKitty’s** advice. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/33 "2001-10-28T06:21:27Z")
But **SweetlilKitty** , if nobody has sex with virgins then, after some time, there would only be virgins left. It would be the end of all mankind. In fact, it is our _duty_ as human beings to have sex with virgins. So go out America and de-virginize. It is the patriotic thing to do. Just stay away from my kids. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Lao](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2bfe46/32.png) [@Dr.Lao](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Lao)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/34 "2001-10-28T06:26:35Z")
**Biggirl** , you are a saint and wise beyond your years. ---
**Author:** ![TN\_hippie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/858c86/32.png) [@TN\_hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TN_hippie)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/35 "2001-10-28T06:36:00Z")
I had a whole essay on good advice, mistakes, myths, funny stories, and some intimate lovemaking episodes that were incredibly intense spiritual experiences. Got carried away, so I erased it all. I realized I was just obsessing because I miss it so much. It’s been too damn long. Damn it, I just miss it all so much. ---
**Author:** ![SweetLilKitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@SweetLilKitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SweetLilKitty)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/36 "2001-10-28T07:10:05Z")
The only reason why I posted that was because we (my apartment mates) have all been through similar situations with guys who are virgins. It all starts out just fine; the guys may be a little too clingy, but it’s cute. Eventually, they want to put you on the back burner while they get to experiment because you already have, even though are still madly in love with you. I do realize that we all start out as virgins, but nothing really good comes from the situation I just described above. All it really does is cause a lot of pain for both people. Sorry to offend, but I just didn’t want to have anyone in that type of situation. ---
**Author:** ![charmaine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19adc/32.png) [@charmaine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/charmaine)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/37 "2001-10-28T08:20:39Z")
i’m with the no-virgin rule. plus, i think, the older one gets, the longer one goes without experiencing the sexo, the bigger a deal it becomes while, for those of us who’ve had the sexo, it becomes less of a big deal. mal situation. besides, virgins can always de-virginize each other, right? RIGHT? been known not to date virgins, charmaine ---
**Author:** ![Bubba\_Ray](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Bubba\_Ray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bubba_Ray)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/38 "2001-10-28T09:08:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dire Wolf \* > \*\*[bubba] > Make dang sure you tie that sheep up tight. > Them hooves’ll cut ya when those back legs get ta kickin’. > [/bubba] \*\* hey 😛 I told you to not talk about my sexlife here 😉 one for the more promiscous people here, never talk about marriage during sex thats a major downer… ---
**Author:** ![vandal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/858c86/32.png) [@vandal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vandal)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/39 "2001-10-28T10:20:12Z")
If it’s the first time with a new partner, do not, under any circumstances, mention anything, not even hint at, anything pertaining to anal. I know this because of… uhhh… well, yeah. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2001, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975/40 "2001-10-28T10:50:50Z")
When caught in flagrante delicto look them straight in the eye, don’t mention it, and see if they have the balls to bring it up. When they **do** bring it up tell them to go to hell. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/advice-of-a-sexual-nature/89975.md?page=3)