# Afghani Islam , Its All About Masturbation **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 3, 2009, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811 "2009-04-03T04:49:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/61 "2009-04-04T05:43:32Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > Absolutely, the people calling for the extermination of a people they do not understand are not being the least bit racist. I don’t know where I got the idea that calling for genocide is a racist position to hold. Isn’t it more of a “culturist” position? It’s not because they’re brown people, it’s because some percentage is a bunch of theocratic assholes who want to treat women little better than slaves. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/62 "2009-04-04T06:16:45Z")
> [@aruvqan](#): > > No shit… > > Sayed Hossain Alemi Balkhi, a Shia lawmaker involved in drafting the law, defended the legislation, saying that it gives more rights to women than even Britain or the US does. > > I have no idea how he can claim this I suspect that he uses a different definition of “rights” than ours. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/63 "2009-04-04T06:31:24Z")
> [@Grumman](#): > > Isn’t it more of a “culturist” position? It’s not because they’re brown people, it’s because some percentage is a bunch of theocratic assholes who want to treat women little better than slaves. I don’t know if there is much value in trying to make that distinction. People are getting all worked up and calling for a mass slaughter of a people and these would be avengers of women rights are exhibiting breathtaking ignorance of the people they want to kill. Seems racist to me, but if it’s culturist, I don’t see much of a difference. They want to kill the others, without really understanding who the others are. The facts are that the US armed and trained the people who became the leaders of the taliban and al Qaeda. The US also engaged in a program to create a school curriculum that would turn a generation of Afghans into fundamentalist killers. Then the US just wandered off and left the country to stew in this cocktail of misery. Then we all stand around on 9/12 and ask “why do they hate us.” Now, we want the US to just wander off again, but first slaughter a bunch of them on the way out the door. Then presumably we can all stand around and ask why the hate us the next time around. Racist, culturist, potato, potahto. Many Afghans have an excuse for being ignorant of the outside world and for not being exposed to new ideas; they live in stone age conditions. What the fuck is the excuse of some of the people posting in this thread? ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/64 "2009-04-04T15:00:49Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > It means she either has to fuck him, or fix the lawn mower. SPLORT!!! Thanks, **Jack**. Now I gotta clean coffee off my keyboard. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/65 "2009-04-04T15:58:20Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > So now rape is totally legal in that abomination of a country. Perhaps we should remove all the women and kids, then nuke whoever’s left. Brilliant plan. I’m sure the kids won’t blame us at all. You know, we can’t adequately police Watts or Compton, or certain districts in pretty much every major city in America. Why don’t we “remove the women and kids, and nuke whoever’s left” there, too? [QUOTE=madmonk28] Racist, culturist, potato, potahto. Many Afghans have an excuse for being ignorant of the outside world and for not being exposed to new ideas; they live in stone age conditions. What the fuck is the excuse of some of the people posting in this thread? [/QUOTE] Willful ignorance instead of ignorance by default. > [@](#): > > Isn’t it more of a “culturist” position? It’s not because they’re brown people, it’s because some percentage is a bunch of theocratic assholes who want to treat women little better than slaves. Ask yourself this: if Sweden instituted a repressive Christian theocracy tomorrow, where women were executed for being raped, and so on, do you think anyone would suggest nuking them? ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/66 "2009-04-04T16:16:19Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Ask yourself this: if Sweden instituted a repressive Christian theocracy tomorrow, where women were executed for being raped, and so on, do you think anyone would suggest nuking them? Quite possibly. Not that either of us can prove it, one way or the other. ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/67 "2009-04-04T16:27:56Z")
> [@Grumman](#): > > Quite possibly. Not that either of us can prove it, one way or the other. Unless one of us can successfully turn Sweden into a theocracy… ---
**Author:** ![Jolly\_Roger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@Jolly\_Roger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jolly_Roger)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/68 "2009-04-04T17:32:42Z")
> [@Walker\_in\_Eternity](#): > > You won’t think that when the Taliban bury you up to your waist and throw stones at you. > > This is one of the most barbarous regimes on the planet, together with the Saudis and yet we (Europe and America) encourage and tolerate this type of behaviour. > > It’s crazy, I’m with **panache45** pull out and nuke the whole place from orbit. Its the only way to be sure. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/69 "2009-04-04T22:17:35Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > Clearly the people in this thread calling for genocide have established themselves as the representatives of truly enlightened civilizations. Help us in identifying other dark skinned people who have offended you so we may murder them as well. I think your work is done here and I would encourage you all to spread the word to other message boards (I hear there are a couple around now where you could call the Afghans cunts before you order their slaughter). Take your time out there and don’t rush back here. And maybe if you’d get off your holier-than-thou high horse, you’d realize that “nuking” someone is a common hyperbole, and rarely is meant literally. And you’re the one bringing the “dark skinned people” issue into this. And who the fuck are you, to decide who posts here and who doesn’t? ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/70 "2009-04-05T02:55:18Z")
I’m a guy with a keyboard and a plan and you’re the guy too stupid to have an opinion. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/71 "2009-04-05T03:53:49Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > I’m a guy with a keyboard and a plan I accept the existence of the keyboard, but what plan are you referring to? ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/72 "2009-04-05T05:10:31Z")
A recent leader of my country had the irrational idea that, by military force and monetary influence, he could get people of other cultures to behave like the ideals of his own religion. He believed this in spite of the documented fact that most people in his own country did not behave that way. His mistaken belief led to big fat failures in our foreign policy. I apologize to the world for that, even though I did not vote for him.:smack: ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/73 "2009-04-05T07:26:54Z")
If a doper posted here that red state America was backwards and intolerant; and that they deserved to be nuked, a lot of the same people here who thirst for the blood of the Afghans would respond the way I have in this thread. The reason is, they would see red state Americans as human beings and that the issues related to their supposed backwardness and intolerance are complex and nuanced. When you don’t see the humanity in another culture/people it is bigotry, plain and simple. ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/74 "2009-04-05T07:46:47Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > If a doper posted here that red state America was backwards and intolerant; and that they deserved to be nuked, a lot of the same people here who thirst for the blood of the Afghans would respond the way I have in this thread. The reason is, they would see red state Americans as human beings and that the issues related to their supposed backwardness and intolerance are complex and nuanced. When you don’t see the humanity in another culture/people it is bigotry, plain and simple. Yes but mention a child rapist and all bets are off. People only have understanding for things in which they are part. If there is no chance poster X could be involved in a certain behavior then that behavior is totally unacceptable and no punishment is enough. Illegal aliens? They are the scum of the earth and no punishment is enough. Because poster X is not an illegal alien and has no need to be one. But suppose a month later he falls in love with a person who happens to be one of those undesirables. Now the point of view changes and generates a lot more understanding. Speeding on the highway? That should not even be illegal because we all do it. Whatever we do is OK. It is whatever others do which is bad beyond comprehension. Americans as a people do not feel any need to try to understand other cultures and they are baffled when other cultures do not understand some things about American culture which, lets face it, seems pretty barbaric in some aspects when seen from the outside. ---
**Author:** ![Icerigger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icerigger/32/432_2.png) [@Icerigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icerigger)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/75 "2009-04-05T10:21:46Z")
The New York times has a recent article about how women are being systematically abused in one way or another around the world including Israel. Religion is no fried to women, I am really getting sick of this crap. [http://thelede.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/04/03/setbacks-for-women-in-israel-pakistan-and-afghanistan/](http://thelede.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/04/03/setbacks-for-women-in-israel-pakistan-and-afghanistan/) ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/76 "2009-04-05T11:30:40Z")
People love to get on their high horses and pontificate how the world _should_ behave (as americans, of course!). They will express outrage at injustice which happens in other lands without caring that there is great injustice also in their own country. They will express the notion that _something_, anything, has to be done to stop the barbarity. But propose that America open its doors and grant asylum to large numbers of these oppressed people. Oh, no! You mean they would be taking our jobs? No way! Hey, if their country is such a shit hole it’s not _my_ fault. Yes, life isn’t fair. Don’t ask me for _my_ money in solving other people’s problems. I’ve got enough problems of my own what with paying for the two cars and the mortgage. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/77 "2009-04-05T12:42:37Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > When you don’t see the humanity in another culture/people it is bigotry, plain and simple. I see their humanity. Humans can be stupid. Some human behaviour needs to be eliminated because it causes more harm than good. If this means eliminating the humans who practice it, take them out as cleanly as possible. ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/78 "2009-04-05T15:20:35Z")
Okay, it’s a trivial point, but what exactly does ‘preen’ mean in this sentence? “The wife is bound to preen for her husband, as and when he desires.” Does that mean just mean she has to dress and arrange her hair the way he likes? Because I’m getting a weird picture of the husband sitting there and ordering her to pose for him like a photographer ordering a model around. “Okay, head back. Further. Now pout. Look sexy, dammit!” ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/79 "2009-04-05T17:07:43Z")
> [@StarvingButStrong](#): > > “Okay, head back. Further. Now pout. Look sexy, dammit!” This being fundamentalist Islam, she need only flash her ankle. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811/80 "2009-04-05T22:49:41Z")
> [@Icerigger](#): > > The New York times has a recent article about how women are being systematically abused in one way or another around the world including Israel. Religion is no fried to women, I am really getting sick of this crap. > > [Women Erased in Israel, Flogged in Pakistan and Restricted in Afghanistan - The New York Times](http://thelede.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/04/03/setbacks-for-women-in-israel-pakistan-and-afghanistan/) No no, it’s cool. Every time there’s a thread about feminism or women’s rights in the 21st century a dozen Dopers will explain that ladies have it just fine (assuming they’re in America which has no immigrants, women who travel outside its borders, no leftover sexist laws or p.o.v.s and perfect equality in every way as long as broads got a sense of humor). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/afghani-islam-its-all-about-masturbation/491811.md?page=5)