# After kicking asses, what do you do with the names? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 31, 2011, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952 "2011-07-31T19:40:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kitty1000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de0a6/32.png) [@kitty1000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitty1000)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/21 "2011-08-01T14:24:37Z")
\*\*\*\*I write their name on a piece of paper, chew up the paper and then let nature take it’s course:) ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/22 "2011-08-01T14:40:07Z")
You take the names of the people whose ass you kicked, so that you can say, “I kicked _his_ ass, I kicked _his_ ass, and I kicked _her_ ass. Do you want to be next?” ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/23 "2011-08-01T14:49:47Z")
After I kick your ass I take your name for your permanent record. Yes, that same record your elementary school kept on you. Every time I am forced to kick someones ass I have to update their records so future ass kickers will know not to let you get away with any of that same shit. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/24 "2011-08-01T14:53:38Z")
> [@Bosstrain](#): > > What do you do with the names?: Write them down on a notepad that you dangle from your balls to show the next guy who starts getting funny ideas… If some dude showed me his balls, I’d probably have funny ideas regardless. A notepad hanging from them would not make said ideas any more orthodox. ---
**Author:** ![Sally\_Mander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e56c9b/32.png) [@Sally\_Mander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sally_Mander)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/25 "2011-08-01T15:16:47Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Screw the names-I’m still looking for some gum to chew. Check under the table. There’s always free gum there. If you find any purple gum, I have dibs! ---
**Author:** ![Quercus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/7ab992/32.png) [@Quercus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quercus)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/26 "2011-08-01T17:29:21Z")
Don’t make the mistake I made once. I got mixed up and accidentally adopted a take-no-names attitude while kicking a$$ and taking prisoners. What a nightmare. What was I supposed to do with a bunch of prisoners and no names? ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/27 "2011-08-01T18:45:18Z")
It’s time to lose your mind and let the crazy out. Tonight we’re taking names 'cause we don’t mess around. This place about to blow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/28 "2011-08-01T19:29:22Z")
Don’t give it back. Then he has no name. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/29 "2011-08-01T19:35:38Z")
Some take the names in order to sell them back. Some take the names so they can cross-index, and not have to kick the same ass twice. “Naw, man, I already kicked your ass. Get outa here.” ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2011, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/30 "2011-08-01T19:43:31Z")
I have a bit of a different interpretation of what it means. That by “name” it means more of their reputation than their actual given name. That is, not only did you beat him up physically, you also sullied his reputation in so doing. Kicing someone’s ass is one thing, but wounds heal; putting your mark on their reputation can last much longer. At the same time, at least in the past, it wasn’t uncommon to take trophies of people you defeated, often a part of their anatomy or whatever. In a “more civilized” time, combined with the fact that you’re just beating them up and not killing them, your trophy becomes their name, whether it actually is their name or just in having etched your thorough beating of them into their reputation as a trophy. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2011, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/31 "2011-08-02T02:04:24Z")
> [@shiftless](#): > > After I kick your ass I take your name for your permanent record. Yes, that same record your elementary school kept on you. Every time I am forced to kick someones ass I have to update their records so future ass kickers will know not to let you get away with any of that same shit. Basically what I’m sayin’ > [@StusBlues](#): > > If some dude showed me his balls, I’d probably have funny ideas regardless. A notepad hanging from them would not make said ideas any more orthodox. Bwahahahaha…haha (extension of earlier Bwahaha) **shiftless** will straighten you out, but you’re right, I would have to give them a dubious look myself…:dubious:… ---
**Author:** ![eddiec3434](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cab0a1/32.png) [@eddiec3434](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eddiec3434)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2011, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/32 "2011-08-02T03:39:25Z")
You arrive at a scene of chaos, you start roughing people up and then then the gloves come off. You start tazeing and pepper spraying people. You might have to actually use your baton and even your fists. Now after the paramedics arrive and everyone’s wounds are getting dressed, you start taking down names for the subsequent incident report. ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2011, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952/33 "2011-08-02T13:48:53Z")
> [@Quercus](#): > > What was I supposed to do with a bunch of prisoners and no names? That’s easy. Put them in cells without numbers. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-kicking-asses-what-do-you-do-with-the-names/590952.md?page=1)