# After the divorce, why did you keep his name? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 5, 2016, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608 "2016-06-05T21:25:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/21 "2016-06-06T04:04:33Z")
My dad remarried to a woman who had the same first name as my mother, so she kind of had to change her name, but instead of going all _née_, she took a fanciful spelling of her mother’s maiden name (because feminism), which makes her the only person in the country (probably the world) with that name. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/22 "2016-06-06T04:39:25Z")
> [@PoppaSan](#): > > I had a female acquaintance that kept her ex’s name that was harder to spell and pronounce because her maiden name was very easy to ridicule. She had heard it all growing up and wasn’t going back to it. I know someone who is a high school English teacher, whose maiden name was almost, but not quite, as unfortunate as being a teacher of high school freshmen, and being named “Miss Butt.” It was about 99% that bad. 2 years into teaching, she married a man whose last name was almost as fortunate for an English teacher as “Shakespeare.” It was actually a little more like “Marlowe,” but it was very good. They are still married, but if she ever divorces him, she’d be a fool to go back to her maiden name. ---
**Author:** ![Cub\_Mistress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@Cub\_Mistress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cub_Mistress)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/23 "2016-06-06T04:43:38Z")
it’s a combination of several of the previous reasons. It was my name for at least twice as long as my maiden name, it is the name of my children, and it is the name on my professional licenses. Plus, it is way cooler than my birth name, in that it is actually unique in the world as far as I can tell. Just goes to show ya how personal this business about names is. ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/24 "2016-06-06T14:49:26Z")
It’s better than mine and easier to spell. ---
**Author:** ![Morelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5e925/32.png) [@Morelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morelin)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/25 "2016-06-06T15:05:59Z")
> [@Dr.Drake](#): > > But the same logic should apply equally to changing your name at marriage. Yes, but when you’re getting married, the effort seems worth it. You’re combining your lives and starting a family, and yada yada. I had a peaceable divorce, with no hate or acrimony, so why bother? ---
**Author:** ![AngelSoft](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/angelsoft/32/440_2.png) [@AngelSoft](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelSoft)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/26 "2016-06-06T15:11:20Z")
And see here I am the complete opposite. I kept my maiden name even after marriage and even insisted our daughter have my last name instead of her father’s, which the hospital was pushing for. I just…didn’t like his last name lol And I think also, subconsciously I knew the marriage wasn’t going to work and I was saving myself the trouble of having to change everything back when we inevitably split up. Because even if I had taken his name, I would have switched back. I’ve been ‘Angel Soft’ my whole life and that’s WHO I am. Being someone named ‘Angel Hard’ just isn’t me and I can’t stand not being me. If that even makes any sense. ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/27 "2016-06-06T15:13:30Z")
My mother resumed using her maiden name after the last of her six children left home. My daughter got married this weekend. She doesn’t have the option of changing her name; in Quebec married women MUST keep their maiden name. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/28 "2016-06-06T15:49:31Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > Not quite the same thing, but my mother still uses my father’s name even though she was widowed 17 years ago, and remarried 14 years ago. I kept my first husband’s name after his death and my remarriage because it’s just a great name. Easy to spell. Easy to pronounce. Much better than my difficult German maiden name and (sorry, my love) better than my husband’s name. When I married the first time, I told my new spouse that I was changing my name to his and would never ever give it up. Going strong for 20 years! ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/29 "2016-06-06T17:34:42Z")
> [@DigitalC](#): > > One ex girlfriend told me “I’m not keeping my ex husband’s name, I’m keeping my children’s names”. My first wife settled on changing to a hyphenated name so she could use her maiden name and still share the kids’ name. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/30 "2016-06-06T17:39:45Z")
A girlfriend of mine has 5 kids with her dick of an ex-hisband. She kept the name because of the kids. If I were to ever get a divorce, I already told my husband I’m keeping his name. My maiden name was Smith. Boooorrrrinng! ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/31 "2016-06-06T20:59:09Z")
My mother kept my fathers name after the divorce only because she didn’t like her maiden name, besides my father’s last name is cool as shit. Can’t blame her. ---
**Author:** ![phall0106](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phall0106/32/5934_2.png) [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/32 "2016-06-07T00:29:29Z")
My maiden name was Pitts. Would anyone in their right mind consider voluntarily going back to Pitts (especially since his was pretty common). Besides, the two girls had his last name. Now it’s been mine for so long, I OWN it. ---
**Author:** ![Dinna\_Fash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ea924/32.png) [@Dinna\_Fash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinna_Fash)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2016, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608/33 "2016-06-10T23:28:23Z")
Put me down for keeping my children’s names. However, if had been planning to change my name back, I would have waited a while. My ass of an ex is so pissed that I have his name that he changed my name in his contacts and gave my maiden name to his lawyer. I was receiving legal documents in that name and I made them change it. That’s not me. I don’t even have any identification with that name. Now I’m remarried (to a black woman) and the evil side of me would have her change her last name to mine. I would love to see the face on my racist white elitist homophobic ex if we did that. But. I actually can’t wait to get rid of the name and take my wife’s. Just waiting till the kids are older and the drama around the divorce dies down (Ha!) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/after-the-divorce-why-did-you-keep-his-name/756608.md?page=1)