# Ag: The Return **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 16, 2003, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273 "2003-06-16T18:58:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/1 "2003-06-16T18:58:33Z")
Am I back? Yes! Does anyone care? Probably not! Am I going to let that stop me? Hell No! Thought I’d check in and say hi from the 1200 post newbie. Now to start reading again. Ack. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/2 "2003-06-16T19:01:05Z")
Er welcome back, whoever the hell you are. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/3 "2003-06-16T19:49:51Z")
Hi! Where ya been? Did ya bring me a present?!? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/4 "2003-06-16T19:53:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \* > **Hi! Where ya been? Did ya bring me a present?!** Just took a break for awhile. And, of course I brought you a present. It’s right…hey, look! Something shiny over there! _sneaks away_ ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/5 "2003-06-16T23:43:21Z")
Greetings, **Ag**. How long has it been? The last time I remember hearing from you was around the time of that party at **Mtgman** ’s house. ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/6 "2003-06-17T00:07:44Z")
I remember you! I also remember that you’re supposed to be taking me to Bennigan’s tonight. Hurry up and get your arse over here. I’m hungry! ---
**Author:** ![Moxmaiden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@Moxmaiden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moxmaiden)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/7 "2003-06-17T01:20:25Z")
😃 **Grace** that made me LOL! Hey, we need to do a BIG Dopefest for “The Return of Ag”. What do you think? Melissa ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/8 "2003-06-17T01:23:01Z")
Oops! I shoulda said that party at **Moxmaiden** ’s. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecccb3/32.png) [@Lord\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/9 "2003-06-17T01:33:23Z")
Hey, **Ag** , what the hell is up? I thought you had just become **Grace** ’s boy toy and that was the end of it. Good to hear from you again. ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/10 "2003-06-17T08:06:09Z")
An excuse to have a party? Sure thing. The only problem I see about getting together is I’m going out of town on Wednesday. Tomorrow night is my last night at home until July 5th. Can we plan something after that? Mike’s coming over tomorrow to watch tv. Anyone else that would like to come over and help me bake cookies for my flight is more than welcome to come over. ---
**Author:** ![Moxmaiden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@Moxmaiden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moxmaiden)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/11 "2003-06-17T11:54:36Z")
Ack, would love to help you get ready for your flight, and the kids would love to _help_ make cookies, but I have a party to do tonight. Have a wonderful time! We will miss you while you are gone. Hey, how long are you going to be gone? Melissa Will miss you at Regional too! ---
**Author:** ![Moxmaiden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@Moxmaiden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moxmaiden)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/12 "2003-06-17T11:55:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Grace \* > \*\*Tomorrow night is my last night at home until July 5th. \*\* :smack: Doh’ 🙂 Melissa ---
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/13 "2003-06-17T12:46:16Z")
Ringo, yep. That was the last party. You need to get up here more often because God knows we’re all too lazy to head down there. Grace enjoyed dinner. And ice cream. And my irresistable charm, or something like it. She seemed kind of annoyed at how long it took me to finish my beer. “You can leave it,” she said. Hah! She knows nothing of beer. Moxmaiden, I’m up for a party. With Grace out of town, we have unlimited access to her apartment. She’ll regret giving me a key, yet. I can see it now. And Jim, nope. I’m not _just_ her boy toy anymore. When I took the job I didn’t realize that being her boy toy only consisted of going to movies, holding her purse and entertaining her when she’s bored. She mentioned it was like the Seinfeld episode where one guy does the work and the other get all the benefits. When do I get some benefits, God?! When?! Oh, well. Signing off. Or reading. Something. Crap. ---
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/14 "2003-06-17T12:56:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Aglarond \* > **She’ll regret giving me a key, yet. I can see it now.** Scene: Night. In front of Grace’s door. Aglarond on his knees with a lockpick. Ringo: Hurry up. The neighbors are looking at us funny. Aglarond: _waves_ Hi, neighbors. Lord Jim: Hey. Dumbass. You have a key. Aglarond: Oh, yeah. _opens door_ Jim immediately heads for the fridge where he sees Grace has stocked no beer. He collapses and falls, knocking a bowl off the counter which lands on Ringo’s foot. He passes out from the pain. Aglarond: Sissy. Moxmaiden: Now that we’re alone, I’m making you my boy toy. Aglarond: But what about Mtgman? Moxmaiden: He won’t care if you hold my purse. Aglarond: Ok, then. Wow. What a story. Can’t wait for it to happen in real life. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/15 "2003-06-17T13:35:00Z")
Ag smash! I’m sorry. I’m so sorry… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/16 "2003-06-17T14:11:11Z")
Don’t forget the shoe shopping. **Aglarond** has been forced to take me shoe shopping and help me look for pink or white sandals to wear to a wedding. Maybe forced it the wrong word. I merely suggested it and he said okay. I highly recommend him for all your boy toy needs. ---
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/17 "2003-06-17T14:17:25Z")
I’d blocked that out, Grace. Thanks for bringing it up. Pink is sissier than Ringo passing out from foot pain. And, hey Munch from Parts Unknown. Is that Parts Unknown, OK or KS? ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/18 "2003-06-17T14:45:51Z")
I’m beginning to suspect that Parts Unknown is actually in South Dakota. ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/19 "2003-06-17T14:52:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Aglarond \* > \*\*Grace enjoyed dinner. And ice cream. And my irresistable charm, or something like it. She seemed kind of annoyed at how long it took me to finish my beer. “You can leave it,” she said. Hah! She knows nothing of beer. \*\* BTW, you’re such a bonehead. You had two girls at dinner and they were wanting to take you back to the apartment. You could’ve been doing the funky monkey, but . . . nooooooo! You had to finish your beer. ---
**Author:** ![Aglarond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@Aglarond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglarond)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273/20 "2003-06-17T15:13:55Z")
The funky monkey? Is that where you grab my mints? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ag-the-return/182273.md?page=2)