# AGH!!! I am so GODDAMN STUPID!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 21, 2000, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633 "2000-12-21T01:51:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DocDaneeka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c68b51/32.png) [@DocDaneeka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocDaneeka)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/1 "2000-12-21T01:51:20Z")
I’m such a fucking moron!!! I ordered this necklace off Ebay for my GF for Christmas. I get paranoid about gifts. I’ve had some bad experiences in the past. I even asked you guys for help, and you gave wonderful comments - see: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=50531](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=50531) Anyway, this was my WORST FUCKUP EVER!!! I thought I was buying her an emerald and an opal. I know NOTHING about jewelry. Turns out (according to my friendly neighborhood jeweler) it’s COSTUME JEWELRY!!! And the WORST fucking part is, IT’S MY OWN GODDAMN FAULT!!! It says right in the description: “4mm round emerald crystal” and “10x8mm opal black triplet”, which, anyone with BRAINS ENOUGH TO DO THE FUCKING RESEARCH would know means they’re FAKE!!! But NO!!! I have to go and trust that they’re REAL!!! I can’t even bitch at the seller!!! AGH!!! So, I’m stuck with this FUCKING PASTE JEWELRY, and no money to buy a nice gift before Christmas!!! DAMN ME TO HELL!!! A possible silver lining… ladies, I’ll probably be single in a couple of days. (If I don’t commit suicide). Next time I’ll know to buy actually REAL jewelry. Any takers? Sorry. Carry on with your lives. \ ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/2 "2000-12-21T02:03:58Z")
Call me crazy, but who cares if it’s costume? If it’s pretty and she likes it, and you put time and thought into it, what difference does it make? It wouldn’t bother me at all… Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Celyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/3 "2000-12-21T02:13:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DocDaneeka \* > \*\* … A possible silver lining… \*\* And you’re sure that is really silver, are you? 🙂 Calm down, I think Guinastasia is absolutely right here. And you deserve a good festive season for all the panic and worry you have invested in this anyway. ---
**Author:** ![DocDaneeka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c68b51/32.png) [@DocDaneeka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocDaneeka)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/4 "2000-12-21T02:24:08Z")
Thank you folks. The couple of friends I bitched to in RL said basically the same thing. I understand it’s the thought that counts. However, this particular thought could have cost me a fifth of what I paid!!! AGH! Basically, I feel stupid for not doing more research. Dern it. Thanks again though. I’ll be ok in a few minutes. \ ---
**Author:** ![DocDaneeka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c68b51/32.png) [@DocDaneeka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocDaneeka)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/5 "2000-12-21T02:27:47Z")
I just noticed **nowalls99’s** thread “Stupid people piss me off” [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=51691](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=51691) Heh. They piss me off too. Especially when I’m the stupid people. No, really, I’m ok. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/6 "2000-12-21T03:08:46Z")
If you really want to give her a substitute gift, you could offer to be her slave for the day. It shouldn’t cost you anything (depending on what she has you do for her), and you’ll be lavishing attention on her all day. What better way to treat your GF on Christmas day? ---
**Author:** ![Origato](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b2d939/32.png) [@Origato](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Origato)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/7 "2000-12-21T03:17:52Z")
Uhh, just how stupid were you? I mean, how much did you pay for this piece of shit? Caveat emptor! Maybe you could just show her your credit card bill. That might give an indication of how much you love her, but unfortunately has the equal and opposite effect of demonstrating what a dumbfuck moron you really are. Well, you said it first… ---
**Author:** ![imthjckaz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/imthjckaz/32/3223_2.png) [@imthjckaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/imthjckaz)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/8 "2000-12-21T04:00:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DocDaneeka \* > \*\*I’m such a fucking moron!!! > I ordered this necklace off Ebay for my GF for Christmas. I get paranoid about gifts. I’ve had some bad experiences in the past. I even asked you guys for help, and you gave wonderful comments - see: > [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=50531](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=50531) > > Anyway, this was my WORST FUCKUP EVER!!! > And the WORST fucking part is, IT’S MY OWN GODDAMN FAULT!!! > DAMN ME TO HELL!!! > \*\* Don’t be so hard on your self Doc, I’m sure you’ll have more opportunities to fuck up worse than this, and then in comparison this matter will seem trivial. And besides, it’s not the gift, but the thought that counts, right girls? Girls? \ ---
**Author:** ![Lexicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ac8455/32.png) [@Lexicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lexicon)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/9 "2000-12-21T04:16:41Z")
Aww, don’t sweat it, Doc. Years and years and all that rot from now, I’m sure that the bauble will have much sentimental value. Recall if you will the old fable of the poor guy who had a poor girlfriend. He gave her a poor plastic ring for an engagement ring, and they went on to have a poor wedding and raise a bunch of poor kids. Poor things. Anyway, the point is that it can be something special, even if the materials that comprise it aren’t. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/10 "2000-12-21T04:19:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by imthjckaz \* > \*\*And besides, it’s not the gift, but the thought that counts, right girls? > Girls? > \ \*\* Hush, you crickets! Yes, you’re absolutely right, **imthjckaz**. ---
**Author:** ![Jello](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f05b48/32.png) [@Jello](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jello)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/11 "2000-12-21T04:28:35Z")
It’s probably all because your body temperature is a measly 96.8. ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/12 "2000-12-21T04:33:05Z")
Not everyone gives a crap about the “real” content of jewelry. Jewelry is not an investment–well, it’s a crappy one if it is! Don’t tell anyone, but my wedding ring is CUBIC ZIRCONIA. We tried to have one made to match my engagement ring (which does have real diamonds and a sapphire) but the jeweler screwed it up. After blowing that money and time on that complete wasted effort, I couldn’t bear to risk it again. To cheer myself up and to test out a different style of ring that might match it, I bought (for myself) this fake engagement set for about $150, shelved the completely cheesy looking engagement ring, and kept the anniversary-style and decent-looking wedding ring. At first, I vowed I’d replace it someday. Now, I just don’t care. It looks really good with my engagement ring, and I don’t travel in jeweler’s circles where it will be noticed and snickered at. Now whenever I see a real band, I look at the pricetag and think about things I’d much rather have. Anyway, this saga is a long-winded way of saying if the jewelry looks beautiful, you’ve done a super job. I wouldn’t care if it were “real,” and maybe your GF won’t either. ---
**Author:** ![DocDaneeka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c68b51/32.png) [@DocDaneeka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocDaneeka)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/13 "2000-12-21T05:27:56Z")
Ahh, you guys are so good to me. Hopefully my GF is just as forgiving. > [@](#): > > AudreyK: > If you really want to give her a substitute gift, you could offer to be her slave for the day. And how would this be different from every other day? 🙂 > [@](#): > > Origato: > Uhh, just how stupid were you? I mean, how much did you pay for this piece of shit? > > Caveat emptor! > > Maybe you could just show her your credit card bill. That might give an indication of how much you love her, but unfortunately has the equal and opposite effect of demonstrating what a dumbfuck moron you really are. > > Well, you said it first… Well, she ought to be used to what a dumbfuck I am by now. She seems to be fairly dumbfuck resistant. Lucky me. And, I paid about 5 times too much for that piece of shit. Not a ton of money by any means, but I’m still pissed \ > [@](#): > > imthjckaz: > Don’t be so hard on your self Doc, I’m sure you’ll have more opportunities to fuck up worse than this, and then in comparison this matter will seem trivial. > And besides, it’s not the gift, but the thought that counts, right girls? > Girls? > \ I know, I know… it’s the freakin’ thought… but what if the thought is COMPLETELY LAME-ASS STUPID!!! Ok, sorry. I appreciate the sentiment. I really do. > [@](#): > > Lexicon: > Aww, don’t sweat it, Doc. Years and years and all that rot from now, I’m sure that the bauble will have much sentimental value. > Recall if you will the old fable of the poor guy who had a poor girlfriend. He gave her a poor plastic ring for an engagement ring, and they went on to have a poor wedding and raise a bunch of poor kids. Poor things. Anyway, the point is that it can be something special, even if the materials that comprise it aren’t. Or, years from now, after she dumps me, it’ll serve as a reminder of WHAT A FREAKIN’ MORON I AM and why she’s GLAD she dumped me!!! Errr, or, maybe you’re right. As for the old fable… part of the problem is I’m NOT a poor guy… so I give her this gift worth like $10. Makes me look GREAT. So I explain to her what happened and make myself look stupid. So I have a choice. Cheap or stupid. Lucky me. Ummm… AudreyK… see my response to imthjckaz above 🙂 > [@](#): > > Jello: > It’s probably all because your body temperature is a measly 96.8. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! > [@](#): > > CrankyAsAnOldMan: > \ > …Anyway, this saga is a long-winded way of saying if the jewelry looks beautiful, you’ve done a super job. I wouldn’t care if it were “real,” and maybe your GF won’t either. Well, as luck would have it, she’s been showing me the kind of jewelry she likes online. (Sure, she waited until AFTER I ordered this piece of crap). I asked about the cz thing… and she wants a real one. Dammit. Dammitalltohell. I personally can’t see the difference. I wouldn’t consider her shallow or materialistic most ways… but OH BOY… she wants them stones. Well, I really do appreciate your support. I’m sure it won’t be that bad. I just hate feeling like I’ve been had… AND it’s my own damn fault. And I hate giving her something so much lesser than I wanted to give her. Ah well. Fuck it. And if she DOES get really pissed (she won’t) fuck her too. Boy, am I in a good mood or what? ---
**Author:** ![Lexicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ac8455/32.png) [@Lexicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lexicon)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/14 "2000-12-21T05:29:47Z")
> [@](#): > > Cheap or stupid. Dude, that’s _every_ guy’s choice. Run with it. ---
**Author:** ![Badtz\_Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@Badtz\_Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Badtz_Maru)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/15 "2000-12-21T05:34:15Z")
Well, do you think she’s the type who would be able to tell or get it appraised? 8^) ---
**Author:** ![Badtz\_Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@Badtz\_Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Badtz_Maru)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/16 "2000-12-21T05:38:38Z")
How much did you pay for it? I hope you seriously underestimated how much emeralds cost and didn’t bid enough for a real one - I looked at the pic of it on the other thread, and if that was real…I’d expect to pay at LEAST $500…probably more, though it’s hard to judge the size of that rock in the picture. ---
**Author:** ![DocDaneeka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c68b51/32.png) [@DocDaneeka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocDaneeka)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/17 "2000-12-21T06:57:24Z")
Here we go again. Nothing like drowning my sorrows in the SDMB 😃 And, one day when I’m not so tired, I’ll get the quote thingy right too. > [@](#): > > Lexicon: > Dude, that’s every guy’s choice. Run with it. I suppose you’re right my friend. What really sucks is when you end up both. > [@](#): > > Badtz Maru: > How much did you pay for it? I hope you seriously underestimated how much emeralds cost and didn’t bid enough for a real one - I looked at the pic of it on the other thread, and if that was real…I’d expect to pay at LEAST $500…probably more, though it’s hard to judge the size of that rock in the picture. Unfortunately, this is only gonna make me look CHEAPER… I know absolutely NOTHING about jewelry and gemstones and what they’re worth. I only paid about $70 total for the thing. (BTW, I’m not bitching about the money I lost… I drop $70… even when I can’t afford it… easier than that… I just hate feeling like I’ve been stupid). So, no big loss, really. I probably should have gone for a nicer/more expensive gift in the first place. I just thought it was really pretty and… ahem… real. So, an update… I went to her house for a bit, told her what happened (she’s already heard me whine about how I was sure she was gonna hate it… I’ve been a Drama Queen over this piece of crap the whole time) and showed it to her. She’s like, “Well, I hope you didn’t pay more than like $10 for it.” So, I get to be cheap AND stupid. Cheap because she thinks I only spent like $30 for it. And stupid, because she thinks I spent a whopping $30 on it. So, a nice balance between the two. I can live with that. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/18 "2000-12-21T07:25:01Z")
Hey **Doc** … I don’t know if this’ll make you feel any better, but stupidity can be endearing sometimes… 🙂 If this hasn’t turned you off completely to the idea of buying your GF emerald jewelry ever again (wouldn’t blame you if it did), check out [this page](http://www.jewelrymall.com/stones/emerald.html), which gives lots of info, tips, and links to online merchants. Merry Christmas to you and your SO. ---
**Author:** ![Badtz\_Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@Badtz\_Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Badtz_Maru)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/19 "2000-12-21T08:02:08Z")
Well, at least you aren’t out a lot of money. It could have been worse. I’m sure in the future you will do a bit more research before purchasing things you know little about. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633/20 "2000-12-21T14:16:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DocDaneeka \* > \*\* (BTW, I’m not bitching about the money I lost… I drop $70… even when I can’t afford it… easier than that… \*\* Then you’re set! Just drop another $150 for an emerald necklace or earrings at one of the jewelry stores in the mall…and you can toss the plastic-and-glass into the neighbour’s garbage. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/agh-i-am-so-goddamn-stupid/46633.md?page=2)