# ahh shes gonna flip lol **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [June 30, 2009, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419 "2009-06-30T00:25:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/21 "2009-06-30T04:48:28Z")
Oh it’s your MOTHER that will flip? Sure it’s not your boyfriend? The answer is easy, you sneak into your house and get out the vacuum, put the hose to your neck and scream “HELP, HELP,” then that explains that. ---
**Author:** ![Tabby\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tabby\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabby_Cat)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/22 "2009-06-30T04:51:06Z")
> [@Silophant](#): > > Brittany is usually a girl’s name. The OP’s name? **It’s Brittany** > bitch. It’s also the first line of a Britney Spear’s song, “Gimme More”, not that I would know anything about that. Or admit to knowing anything about that. Given as, you know, I don’t know anything about that, there’s nothing to admit to. You know. Um. ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/23 "2009-06-30T04:55:34Z")
The real question is will she return to read these responses? I think not. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/24 "2009-06-30T05:04:53Z")
> [@Duckster](#): > > The real question is will she return to read these responses? > > I think not. Well that’s a given. Her profile states she’s in NY. So it’s 1AM there. Assuming she leads a somewhat normal life, she’s at home already and her mom has probably already dismembered the corpse. We should all say lower our heads in silence. _silence_ ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/25 "2009-06-30T05:05:22Z")
> [@Markxxx](#): > > Oh it’s your MOTHER that will flip? Sure it’s not your boyfriend? > > The answer is easy, you sneak into your house and get out the vacuum, put the hose to your neck and scream “HELP, HELP,” then that explains that. I don’t even have a hickey and I plan on doing this! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/26 "2009-06-30T05:09:09Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > I don’t even have a hickey and I plan on doing this! If you had some seaweed you could yell ‘KELP! KELP!’ So how do we know she was making out with a guy? ---
**Author:** ![Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/half_man_half_wit/32/21766_2.png) [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Half_Man_Half_Wit)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/27 "2009-06-30T09:18:32Z")
Crochet a scarf from poison ivy – the resulting rash will cover up the hickeys! Or get them tattooed over. Even if your mom notices them, she probably won’t care! In a similar vein, tell her you’re pregnant. Then tell her you really have no idea how that could have happened, seeing how you’re gay and all. Blame it on all the drugs you’ve been doing. When she regains consciousness, you can probably safely show her the hickeys. Tell her you’ve been attacked by an elderly vampire who’d forgotten his dentures. Deliberately infect yourself with leprosy, the sores should look similar enough. ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/28 "2009-06-30T09:50:09Z")
Tell mom it’s Lupis. And I like the idea of getting a tatoo to blend in with the hickeys. Go Goth; heavy black and white makeup. ---
**Author:** ![Ruby\_Slippers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/94ad74/32.png) [@Ruby\_Slippers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby_Slippers)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/29 "2009-06-30T09:50:21Z")
Many years ago, a friend of mine had the same problem. When her mother spotted the hickey and said, “What’s that on your neck??!!”, my friend, thinking quickly, began to scratch the spot and replied, “I don’t know but it sure does itch!” Of course, her mother was quite naive. YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/30 "2009-06-30T12:02:17Z")
Could you cover a Hickey with a dickey? > [@Colibri](#): > > If it’s [Dale Dickey](http://www.imdb.com/media/rm3636499712/nm0225460), probably. Can we make this thread a sticky? ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/31 "2009-06-30T12:23:41Z")
> [@Smithsb](#): > > Tell mom it’s Lupis. Don’t you watch **House**? It’s _never_ lupus!😉 Serious answer (not just for the OP, but for anyone else here who may be interested: my 18YO has found that layering on mineral foundation covers hickeys a lot better than any other kind of makeup she’s found. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that she’s got a _freakin’_ bunch of long, thick hair that can be artfully arranged to cover most of her neck. . . (And it doesn’t _help_ that she inherited my complexion and bruises if someone breathes on her too hard. . .) ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/32 "2009-06-30T12:50:10Z")
> [@Sigmagirl](#): > > Could you cover a Hickey with a dickey? > > [QUOTE= Colibri] > > If it’s Dale Dickey, probably. Can we make this thread a sticky? [/QUOTE] Picky, picky. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/33 "2009-06-30T12:58:46Z")
Ask your Gran how your mother used to cover them up … 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/34 "2009-06-30T13:17:50Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > There’s also the fact that if the parents of a girl find out she was fooling around with a boy, she gets punished (or at least chastised). If the parents of a boy find out he was fooling around with a girl, he gets a high five. This is all canceled out later in life when women (teachers) mess around with their students and get off (pun intended) much easier when they are busted. ---
**Author:** ![smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smoke)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/35 "2009-06-30T18:09:01Z")
If you choose to claim an injury (a curling iron incident, for example), remember to pretend it hurts when ma pokes at it. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/36 "2009-06-30T18:14:31Z")
Well you can stop being a little hussy, for one… ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/37 "2009-06-30T19:00:42Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Well you can stop being a little hussy, for one… Best user name/response combination I’ve seen so far today. Hickies are meant to shout your love to all the world; there’s no shutting them up. Well, maybe you could try hitting yourself in the neck really hard so that the whole area bruises but I do NOT advocate that. ---
**Author:** ![JonathanTheRed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8491ac/32.png) [@JonathanTheRed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JonathanTheRed)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/38 "2009-06-30T19:06:15Z")
> [@Philster](#): > > This is all canceled out later in life when women (teachers) mess around with their students and get off (pun intended) much easier when they are busted. [Nnnnnnnice](http://www.southparkstudios.com/episodes/103798/). ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/39 "2009-06-30T23:08:20Z")
> [@BrandonR](#): > > Now how in the hell did I stumble upon an AOL chat room when I was trying to read the SDMB… ::sucking on her gums:: Time was, the SDMB was only available on AOL, and we had a dedicated chat room, too, goshdarnit! You young’ns have no respect, NO RESPECT, for the HISTORY of the SDMB! ::goes back to her tatting:: ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2009, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419/40 "2009-06-30T23:16:47Z")
> [@CookingWithGas](#): > > Also I suggest you put a little more effort into your subject lines. > > > [@samclem](#): > > > > …and lose the color. Hard to read. Lose the leet speak. Other than that, welcome. **samclem** , as a mod, aren’t you supposed to fix the subject line to be descriptive? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ahh-shes-gonna-flip-lol/501419.md?page=3)