# AI text generator **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 9, 2019, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204 "2019-11-09T14:55:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2019, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/141 "2019-11-13T22:54:08Z")
**My name is John Crichton, an astronaut, a radiation wave hit me and I got shot through a wormhole, help me, is anyone out there who can hear me? I’m being hunted by an insane military commander, doing everything I can** to get back to Earth. I need your help! The government is going to kill me anyway. The military is looking for me and that’s why I’m trying to help them. I’m a spy. I am a spy for the government. They want to kill me anyway. Please! We can get you out of there. Please don’t shoot me." When the game starts, John has been captured by an evil group of space marines known as the Orville. His main ally in his mission is his old friend, Commander Tucker, who has been taken to an Orville prison camp where he is trying to rescue his father \*\*You have the right to the remains of a silent attorney, if you cannot afford one, tough noogies, \*\*but you do not have the right to the remains of a dead lawyer, as the Supreme Court has held. I am aware that you may be upset with the Court for taking a look at this issue, but it is the right thing to do. I also recognize that you might be very upset with me, because we are talking about the rights of the public. But you must remember, that every time a lawyer dies or goes bankrupt, the public loses its lawyer. You can’t lose your lawyer without losing your rights to that lawyer. The question, as we have seen, is whether or not the State has a right to seize the remains of a lawyer for the purpose of giving them to the State so they can be disposed of in some way that does not harm the attorney ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/142 "2019-11-14T00:43:20Z")
Dang but that’s cold-hearted! **Nobody knows who released the zombie virus** , but it wasn’t them. You have to work out what to do with the dead. If they’re just sitting there with no purpose, they might as well be corpses." “Then what are we to do with them?” The girl asked. “Well,” the Doctor said. “I don’t know, but I guess I’m going to try and get them to do something useful.” “How?” “I haven’t a clue. We’re going to leave them on their own.” “What about our children?” she asked, worriedly. “Well, there’s some possibility. I mean, we could send them back to them. I mean, they’re dead, right?” “Not exactly,” she said, looking down. “But it’s not like they have much choice.” “I don’t know,” the Doctor said. "I’ve been thinking about it ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/143 "2019-11-14T00:45:02Z")
**Nobody knows who released the zombie virus** to the world? We’re all dead, right? Except for you. You’re the only one who isn’t." She had to admit, it was a nice way to leave. She couldn’t have asked for a more convincing way to leave a conversation. It wasn’t a lie, not really. She did know that. It was like a song. A very, very nice song. The melody of it was something she recognized, and the lyrics were so simple that she couldn’t help but sing along. “Oh, he’ll never see you again. He’s already dead, so you can never see me.” She was already smiling, and it wasn’t a very happy smile, but she had a feeling that was about to change. “No, he’ll be able to see you again soon. Maybe in a few months.” The man turned. She was staring. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/144 "2019-11-14T01:34:50Z")
> [@Skywatcher](#): > > **It’s time for Animaniacs > And we’re zany to the max > So just sit back and relax > You’ll laugh 'til you collapse > We’re Animaniacs!** \*\*They’re Pinky and the Brain, Yes, Pinky and the Brain, One is a genius, the other’s insane. They’re laboratory mice. Their genes have been spliced. \*\* They’ve been given a set of rules and are expected to obey them. “They’re not mice.” What did you expect? The only difference between a mouse and a human is that mice don’t cry. “They don’t cry.” You just made them. “They’re just really weird.” Yeah. “The only reason I can think of that you’re getting it wrong is because you’re so young. I think this is an important distinction.” The whole book is an important distinction. "I don’t think this is an important distinction. I think it’s a very, very, very simple distinction, because if I tell you there’s no difference, and the whole point of this… ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/145 "2019-11-14T05:10:46Z")
**In the not too distant future, next Sunday, A.D. There was a guy named Joel, not too different from you or me He worked at Gizmonics Institute, just another guy in a red jumpsuit he did a good job cleaning up the place, but his bosses didn’t like him so they shot him into space** with a phaser rifle In the year 2029, a young man named Joel has just graduated from the Gizmonics Institute. He’s in a band, with his friends Tom and Pete Tom and Pete have their own problems with drug use. Their band, called “Eyes Without A Face” is on the verge of going bankrupt They are so broke, and so desperate for money that they give up everything to find an illegal alien They take Joel in and make him a member of the band, promising him $1,000,000 a year in record sales But their drug dealing and money-laundering is **In the not-too-distant future Way down in Deep 13, Dr. Forrester and TV’s Frank Were hatching an Evil Scheme. They hired a temp by the name of Mike, Just a regular joe they didn’t like. Their experiment needed a good test case, So they conked him on the noggin And they shot him into space.** And the last we heard of him Was when he told them that he was a A spaceman on his way to Mars To join the good Doctor Forrester’s Team and do some good. But you know what? He’s not going to make it And neither are we. They can’t take the risk of having an accident, Because the space-time continuum Has been reversed. He’s gone back to that old world **In the not-too-distant future Way down in Deep 13, Dr. Forrester and TV’s Frank Were hatching an Evil Scheme. They hired a temp by the name of Mike, Just a regular joe they didn’t like. Their experiment needed a good test case, So they conked him on the noggin And they shot him into space.** The guy’s still around and he’s called “Eddie”. Eddie’s a little tough He likes to show off To the guys in the lab, So, that’s why, The doctor, Dr. Forrester, Called him “Frank”. As a matter of fact, the lab workers Were very afraid When they heard they’d be working With Eddie for a change. (hmm, seems they know about Alternate Universe MST3K with Eddie Nelson…) **In the not too distant future somewhere in time and space Mike Nelson and his robot pals are caught in an endless chase Pursued by a woman whose name is Pearl an evil gal who wants to rule the world She threw a few things in her purse And in her rocketship she hunts him all across the universe** He’s got to stop her before she kills the whole universe It’s going to be an epic battle He’ll be out to save the galaxy Punching his way through space and time In the not too distant future Somewhere in time and space He’s got to stop her before she kills the whole universe This is the beginning of something much bigger… We are the future It’s going to be an epic battle He’ll be out to save the galaxy (I am Crow? 😉 ) its Guardians of the MST! **In the not-too-distant future, Next Sunday A.D. There was a guy named Jonah, Not too different from you or me He worked at Gizmonic Institute, Just another mug in a yellow jump suit A distress call came in for him at half past noon That’s when an evil woman trapped him on the dark side of the moon.** It turns out he had been abducted by the evil witch of the moon, who kept him on the dark side for three years, torturing him with all sorts of horrible things that were done to him This was the guy who ran the Gizmonic Institute The Gizmonic Institute was a company where evil sorcerers could learn how to be like the gods of old. They learned how to be like the gods, and then the evil gods started taking over the planet and the world ended up like that But the good ones, like Jonah and his daughter, kept learning how to use the power of the stars ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/146 "2019-11-14T05:15:15Z")
Naturalistic Marriage Advice: [spoiler] **To marry a pronghorn** , they say, is the only way to guarantee an abundant and prosperous life, as the pronghorn’s horn has been known to increase fertility by 30 percent. And while pronghorn are sometimes hunted in captivity, most of the animals in zoos and other exhibits are wild. So it’s not that hard to picture a woman who is into pronghorn being drawn to the idea of getting married to one, too. In fact, a lot of people have said to me, “Oh, I think I could do that.” The problem is that getting a pronghorn to marry you is an enormous undertaking. There is a reason why pronghorn are rarely shown in nature on television. Not only is the animal a threat to the public, but they live a very solitary life. They are so sensitive to noise and smells that if you set off an alarm for them, they can get themselves killed.[/spoiler][spoiler] **To marry a beaver** is a common and natural thing. The beaver has to mate with one of its own kind, for the sake of the offspring. The beaver must get pregnant and produce offspring, and, if the beaver produces no children, the people who made the beaver must sacrifice it. The sacrifices are performed to the spirit of the beaver. The sacrifice of the beaver is a common and natural thing, and is offered to the god Yama. There are two kinds of beavers, one which is black and white, and the other that is red and black. It is called the red beaver because of the red dye which it has. There is an order of priestesses who carry out the sacrifices and perform the ceremonies. The priestesses are called nayuta and are very rich. They have a very good taste in music, singing, and dance, and they dance in a stately way in a temple.[/spoiler][spoiler] **To marry a mink** ," she says, “it’s like marrying your favorite horse.” But, as anyone who’s seen a mink is aware, there’s no such thing as a “loved” animal; the most they can ever be is “fond,” or “fear.” And while the mink’s fur is more than a foot thick and, according to one local legend, the perfect shape for a pair of shoes, it’s not a favorite of anyone but the mink. The animal is not a very good judge of its own fur. As for the wedding dress, it is the most famous one in history. It’s so famous that there’s even a movie about it. It’s called The Mink Wedding Dress, but there’s no need to call it that, because what makes it such a famous piece of clothing is its owner, Marge Simpson. Simpson, a woman of means, married a mink[/spoiler][spoiler] **To marry an owl** and live out the rest of your days in its house is the ultimate dream, but it’s also the most terrifying. It’s a house that only an owl could build, where its entire family lives together, and where there are no windows, and no doors to be opened. The owl-house is built for only one person, and there’s only one way out. The owl needs to make a daring escape, or die. A couple of decades ago, a British man named Graham Goggins built one of these houses for a client in the middle of a cornfield in North Devon. The client, whose name we won’t mention for security reasons, was a billionaire and a local property tycoon. The man, who also wanted to remain anonymous, told the BBC that the entire house was constructed out of plywood and cement.[/spoiler] ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/147 "2019-11-14T05:58:43Z")
**The recipe for the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster;** "I have had the misfortune to discover that the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster was an ancient device of great power used by the first Galactic Empire. Unfortunately, it is extremely rare, and is only obtained through the most unusual circumstances. As it is a very complex device, one that requires the assistance of several skilled engineers and technicians, only a select number of Imperials are qualified to pilot the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster to its full extent. The Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is a device of immense power. The weapon is a device that uses the energy from the planet’s core and uses it to shoot out balls of energy that are capable of destroying an entire planet, although it requires more energy to fire the weapon continuously than it is used for. The weapon’s power is also enhanced by the presence of the planet’s natural magnetism. The weapons are used primarily by the Imperial Stormtroopers and Imperial Navy personnel." That’s no moon… The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster! **A Towel is the most massively useful device any Galactic hitchhiker can own.** (Multiple entries combined here…) You can use it to help you avoid bumping into other cars, you can carry your belongings in it, it can be a makeshift blanket, towel, or blanket to cover the ground as you crawl, it’s a really useful item for any hitchhiker to own as they will likely need it for at least a couple of days. One of the more unique uses of a Towel is for taking a dip in the lake during the day to dry off. You can pick a location that has the right temperature for it and leave the Towel out to dry for a few hours. If you get a chance to go for a swim later on it won’t take much, maybe a couple of minutes to take a dip. Another useful thing you can do is throw the Towel into the garbage and then leave the area. It will pick up quite a bit of dirt on the bottom and it should take the dirt It allows you to protect yourself from the elements as well as other hazards and even prevent the arrival of other Galactic hitchhikers. This towel can be used to wipe away dirt, grime and other debris, and it is incredibly comfortable and easy to use. This towel has an outer layer of high-quality cotton with a water resistant liner. This inner layer of durable synthetic fabric has been coated with a reflective material to allow you to see in the dark. This towel can also be used as a hand warmer. It’s an item in Fallout 4 and is an upgrade to the towel from Fallout 3, as well as an upgrade to the roll of toilet paper. The Towel is used to dry dirty or wet clothing and to wipe down surfaces. In Fallout 4, it has the same stats and uses the same power as the roll of toilet paper. It is also highly useful for cleaning up spilled radiation, as well as removing radiation from the environment and its victims. The Towel can successfully strike about 695 times from full condition before breaking. When used to cleanse the area, they can cleanse the entire space between you and the nearest hitchhiker, as well as the surrounding area. They can also be used for cleaning out droids and even repairing a vehicle that is being used against you. However, these devices are very rare and expensive, so be very careful. They are also not to be used by a non-Hitchhiker, as they may be mistaken for a blaster or some sort of improvised weapon. It is the most cost-efficient means of travel in every situation. It is also a good way to disguise oneself when attempting to pick a lock or hack a computer terminal. The Towel can also be used as a makeshift parachute. The Towel’s ability to change size was designed to compensate for the fact that it does not work in space. It is smaller than the rest of the galaxy in which it is located. It is also much lighter than most of the rest of the universe. The reason it is able to travel around the universe, and move as fast as it does, is because the universe is incredibly large; it is so large that even with all of its mass concentrated into a tiny space, it is still too large for a human to physically move. In order to be able to move fast in a universe that is so large, a starship and is essential in any hitchhiking attempt. This is the one item you can never have more than one of, as you’ll want the Towel on hand for the long haul. As you can see, it’s an indispensable item for your Galactic Hauler. The Towel will always be with you at all times, and will not leave your hands when you’re travelling to any of the planets of the galaxy. This can be a huge advantage, because if you do find yourself stranded somewhere without the Towel, you’ll have nowhere else to go, and your only option would be to turn to the black market. It is the best piece of equipment in the game for this reason alone. The fact that it’s always with you is why you want the Towel to be in your backpack whenever you are in space. You don’t need it anywhere else. This is a great advantage when it comes to getting more money It allows a vehicle to be picked up by an unarmored human being, with no additional risk of damage. It can also be used to clean and dry a vehicle in the desert, removing sand from the vehicle without damaging it. The Towel also has the ability to protect a vehicle from a hail of gunfire, as well as the ability to create a bubble of protection that prevents damage from lasers, gas, and projectiles. The Towel has also been used to create a sort of bubble shield around the driver of a vehicle to protect it from laser fire. Although it is useful to have this device, there are other things that are more useful that can be used for a hitchhiking job. In this case, the driver has to find a way to take the weapon that is already present in the vehicle, the vehicle itself. A very useful item is a shotgun, because it is very useful for shooting at large animals ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/148 "2019-11-14T15:07:09Z")
# Dislike having to do job references? **John Smith has worked for Advanced Technology Solutions for six years. In that time we have found him to be** very hard-working and a great addition to our team." # Smith had been charged by police with theft, robbery and other offences. He is scheduled to appear in the Southport Magistrates Court on December 23. # But on second thought: **John Smith has worked for Advanced Technology Solutions for six years. In that time we have found him to be** a great guy. He has always responded to our needs with great care and understanding. He is very detail oriented and can really give you his best. We have always appreciated his great customer service. He is also very knowledgeable with our technology. This is why we decided to purchase his services. In addition to being able to repair and maintain our cameras we found him to be the right person to help our son with a new product he is creating. He has worked out a great deal with the manufacturer and we hope to be able to offer him our support for the product. I look forward to more opportunities to work with him and would recommend him to everyone. ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2019, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/149 "2019-11-14T17:04:35Z")
Wow, I must have missed this episode. > [@](#): > > **Come and listen to a story about a man named Jed, poor mountaineer barely kept his family fed** and clothed during his expedition up the Himalayas, but his father’s health was failing. In order to save his father, Jed made a journey to Tibet in an attempt to find a cure for his father’s disease. > The Dalai Lama’s nephew Jampa Thaye Jeda has made the journey to Tibet for many years and during this time, he has had many experiences. On the first journey to Tibet, he came across the Tibetan people in his journey, where the Tibetan people looked out for each other. They treated Jed with respect, and his family were the only ones who knew about Jed’s quest to save his father. In Tibet, Jed encountered many types of animals, and many people, whom he had never seen before, had no idea of what kind of person Jed was. ---
**Author:** ![Mr\_Zox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Mr\_Zox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Zox)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2019, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/150 "2019-11-19T02:30:33Z")
I used the prompt “Dramatis Personae” and got: **Dramatis Personae** - Part One" - 8.4 million “In the Heat of the Night” - 8.4 million “The Great Outdoors” - 6.8 million “The War of the Worlds” - 6.3 million “Casablanca” - 6.2 million “The Wizard of Oz” - 6.1 million “The Wizard of Oz” - 6 million “The Greatest Story Ever Told” - 6.1 million “The Maltese Falcon” - 5.7 million “The Great Escape” - 5.5 million “Dinah” - 5.4 million “The Wizard of Oz” - 4.8 million “The Maltese Falcon” - 4.4 million “The Maltese Falcon” - 4 million “The Maltese Falcon” - 4 million "The Maltese ---
**Author:** ![Hickory\_Joe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Hickory\_Joe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hickory_Joe)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2019, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/151 "2019-11-21T08:29:41Z")
It got kind of personal with me… **I was late for work because** : You never go out on the weekends Every day it seems like it’s summer You said you’d be busy with someone you love But no one ever talked to you You told me you had no problem being in a relationship But you’d rather be dating You said you’d go for a stroll in the park But how do you explain to someone You seem to live for your parents It was a little one, not that much Not that it mattered too much For I knew I’d grow up to be something bigger 'Cause I knew I had a future ahead of me But it turns out the future you thought you had Is just the future you’ve always known You’d rather be dating You said you’d go for a stroll in the park But ---
**Author:** ![WildaBeast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wildabeast/32/6_2.png) [@WildaBeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WildaBeast)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2019, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/152 "2019-11-21T18:51:10Z")
**Jingle bells, Batman smells** a rat. Batman: “Um, uh, yeah, totally…” “Um, uh, yeah, totally…” Batman: “I’m an okay guy.” “I’m an okay guy.” Batman: “Trust me, I know you’re feeling guilty.” “Trust me, I know you’re feeling guilty.” Bruce Wayne: “That’s me, it’s me! I’ve done everything I can to protect you!” “That’s me, it’s me! I’ve done everything I can to protect you!” Commissioner Gordon: “Let me think about this.” “Let me think about this.” Bruce Wayne: “Everything will be all right. Trust me, I know you’re feeling guilty.” “Everything will be all right. Trust me, I know you’re feeling guilty.” Commissioner Gordon: **Another attempt:** **Jingle bells, Batman smells** your fear Just wake up to the games and social media Voting for your favourite comics: the Cosplay Award: Armed with little crayons, but with razor sharp teeth. and poor posture… and out of breath and weak from exertion. All you can think about is how good your cosplay looks in our excellent album pictures. You’ve put so much effort into your costumes that it’s no surprise it looks good, but I can’t wait to see your handiwork! All photographers were granted free reign to shoot on their own terms, if any of them wanted to, as long as it wasn’t already covered by our Terms of Service. So feel free to re-shoot any of the entries in our album, but ---
**Author:** ![WildaBeast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wildabeast/32/6_2.png) [@WildaBeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WildaBeast)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2019, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/153 "2019-11-21T19:00:37Z")
One more… **Jingle bells, Batman smells** … super-duper delicious, in fact. Hopefully no, no, I mean that’s what I believe he’s doing. You know when they start acting strange? Nods when no one is looking. Maybe he’s done that because they smelled bad? He smells like a burrito. He smells like meat (what was he cooked?) And he smells… like… bananas (oh god, what is he doing?) That leaves one big question though: is he an imposter or a real person? I really don’t think that this is Joker, or he’d go and make out with the girl first. Come on, it’s not like he’s what she looks like, right? Wouldn’t that seem a little more natural to him? He could just be a hobo with a funny way of looking at the world. Let’s be realistic, ---
**Author:** ![WildaBeast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wildabeast/32/6_2.png) [@WildaBeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WildaBeast)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2019, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/154 "2019-11-21T19:23:45Z")
I don’t think Vince Gilligan has anything to worry about. > [@](#): > > \*\*Declan : Who the hell are you? > > Walter White : You know. You all know exactly who I am. Say my name.\*\* > > Walter “Zeus” White > > What do I care who cooks spaghetti sauce. It’s what I do with it Wrong kind of cook, Bot! In this attempt at least Walt sounds somewhat sinister. > [@](#): > > \*\*Declan : Who the hell are you? > > Walter White : You know. You all know exactly who I am. Say my name. \*\* ~~~Cut to Walt sitting in a bar as black liquid pours out of his left eye. What look? I can’t believe you. I am Walter White.~~~ Walter enters a hospital for treatment of his left eye. It is believed to be devoured. Perhaps she will again go crazy. ~~~Walter prepares to burn the evidence on the front lawn. Walter White : I’m not as soft as you think. Theres always a price for every thing in this world. And you gotta pay it…all the time. I don’t think we’re gonna be able to come up with a better deal than that, Bonnie.~~~ Cut to prison prison prison Prison Guard : It is three- Third attempt, just generated Breaking Bad characters introducing themselves. Weird formatting left intact. > [@](#): > > \*\*Declan : Who the hell are you? > > Walter White : You know. You all know exactly who I am. Say my name. \*\* > \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ \>Say my name. > Walter : Donna…just call me Walter. > \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ \>Say my name. > Walt : Walt…i’m late for my shift. > \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ \>Say my name. > Jesse : You’re not Jesse Pinkman. He’s not Walt, I can tell. > \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ \>Say my name. > Hank : I’m Hank Schrader. > \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ \>Say my name. > Joe : Hello. My name is Joe Gomez, and I’m the head of security. > \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ \>Say my name. > Hank : Don’t touch that. > \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ \>Say my name. > Hank : Oh, c’mon, Hank. You know it to be true ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2019, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/155 "2019-11-21T19:34:13Z")
:dubious::dubious:🙂 Straight Dope Message Board: Smart or Dopey? Dear Straight Dope Reader, As you know, my new book, Second Opinion, about US education, and about parents and teachers, is going to be published in April by Rodale Books. In the interim, I wanted to pass along some questions and concerns that have come up in my own life. For instance, while I have a rather strict expectation of my children (and of children of all ages), how has this book affected my life, and how does it seem to reflect more than my own viewpoints? What are the lessons? I’m not a fundamentalist. I am far from being a fundamentalist. But my own church has long since separated sex from marriage, and I would never willingly have sex before marriage. But I do not hold such views of sexual relations as anyone else ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2019, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/156 "2019-11-21T19:40:15Z")
Moderation on the SDMB: Humans or Chimps The SDMB issue as it is currently discussed, pits two common viewpoints against each other. While humans and chimps have similar vocabularies and general architecture in the sense that they use very similar symbols for almost all basic concepts, there are significant differences in their innate cognitive and communicative abilities. Chimpanzees have much better social skills, have an apparently greater willingness to cooperate, a much greater capacity to imitate and use visual information, and a much more developed theory of mind. Humans, on the other hand, have an “emotion system,” a system that we share with most other mammals, but which is considerably less developed in humans. The SDMB goes so far as to claim that humans evolved to negotiate negotiations between humans, something chimps could not possibly do. Even when chimpanzees, as described above ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/157 "2019-11-22T18:21:44Z")
Can’t tell a joke very well. > [@](#): > > **A man walks into a bar.** On the other side of the bar he sees two women, all in black, the woman on the left holds a small red hooded mask, in the middle is a brunette with green eyes that hiss at him, and the last woman on his right is fully covered, holding up a torn-off purple scarf. The waiter comes out from the back, the two women give the boy a thumbs up, then leave. The waiter turns to the boy. > > SERGEANT: They don’t ask us to dress up for you boys. Maybe you had to be there. ---
**Author:** ![WildaBeast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wildabeast/32/6_2.png) [@WildaBeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WildaBeast)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/158 "2019-11-22T21:06:23Z")
Continuing the joke theme: > [@](#): > > **How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?** Answer: two. > > How many people were killed in the Holocaust? Answer: One million. > > How many beautiful fruits can fall from the sky? Answer: No one knows. > > What was the first fart heard on earth? Answer: The fart heard by the alleged planet Venus was first recorded by Ufologist and astronomer, Carl Sagan and broadcast on the NBC television network in 1986. The fart was recorded on May 30, 1966 and broadcast in May of 1986. > > How many times did Han Solo Man this AI is a Debbie Downer, giving an unfunny response to a joke setup, and then immediately bringing up the Holocaust. And then it went completely off the rails with that thing about farts. ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/159 "2019-11-22T22:15:38Z")
You don’t like fart jokes? I’m troubled by the reference to the “alleged planet Venus” though. First we lost Pluto, now Venus? ---
**Author:** ![whitetho](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whitetho/32/1059_2.png) [@whitetho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whitetho)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2019, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204/160 "2019-11-22T22:29:31Z")
**Cecil Adams is the world’s most intelligent human being. We know this because: (1) he knows everything, and (2) he is never wrong.** And he now knows something very important: that while geniuses who are good at examining data, but perhaps not very good at decision-making, can make it through life and lead fulfilling and productive lives, genius who are good at decision-making but who are clearly on the verge of making a mess of things can make all the difference. On the matter of their personal risk-taking, Aronowitz [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ai-text-generator/843204.md?page=9)