# Airline passenger arrested for Masturbating 4 times during flight **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 5, 2022, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333 "2022-04-05T18:32:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/21 "2022-04-05T20:33:08Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > unless it’s for a life-threatening emergency. Maybe the pilots thought it was a fish. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/22 "2022-04-05T20:34:39Z")
> [@UltraVires](#): > > In all seriousness, why during masturbation sessions 1-3 did someone not tell the dude to stop? Why just keep watching?.. > > I would love to see the federal charge here. Come on man, this seems like lawyering 1.01 to me. They waited for him to ejaculate across state lines, so the Feds could get him. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/23 "2022-04-05T20:48:16Z")
I’m reminded of the airline pilots whose in-flight announcement was, “Please return the flight attendants to their upright position.” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/24 "2022-04-05T21:03:39Z")
> [@UltraVires](#): > > I would love to see the federal charge here. Being a jerk? ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/25 "2022-04-05T21:13:18Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > Well, what’s the limit then? Three, same as any other tootsie pop. ---
**Author:** ![Biffster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biffster/32/339_2.png) [@Biffster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffster)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/26 "2022-04-05T21:52:44Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > I am no pilot, but AIUI, diverting a flight is considered a last resort. You don’t put 100-200 people at a huge inconvenience, cost the airline a million dollars, and throw all sorts of scheduling in wack unless it’s for a life-threatening emergency. “In wack.” I see what you did there. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/27 "2022-04-05T22:31:57Z")
“I just flew in from Seattle and boy is my arm tired.” ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/28 "2022-04-05T23:05:24Z")
I don’t think that’s how the Mile High Club works. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/29 "2022-04-05T23:10:34Z")
So does this put Louis CK on the no-fly list? ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2022, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/30 "2022-04-05T23:12:20Z")
> [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#): > > “I just flew in from Seattle and boy is my arm tired.” LOL! I just want to know if he was masturbating [LIKE A MOTHER FUCK!!!](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woooo-i-am-masturbating-like-a-mother-fuck/231264) ---
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/31 "2022-04-06T00:26:58Z")
Maybe he thought he was going to a baseball game between the Expos and Yanks. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/32 "2022-04-06T00:37:33Z")
> [@ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](#): > > Just checked Southwest’s website. That’s a 2 hour 50 minute flight. He had time to get off and recharge 4 times, and then fall asleep, in less than 3 hours. Yeah, I’m just wondering – is this guy like 16? Can’t find any info on his age anywhere. And if not, can I have whatever the hell he’s having that he could get it off 4 times in less than the length of that flight? I don’t even think at my randiest and hormoniest my body could handle a recovery time like that. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/33 "2022-04-06T00:45:25Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > I don’t think that’s how the Mile High Club works. Mile high rub. mmm ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/34 "2022-04-06T00:51:05Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > Yeah, I’m just wondering – is this guy like 16? Can’t find any info on his age anywhere. And if not, can I have whatever the hell he’s having that he could get it off 4 times in less than the length of that flight? I don’t even think at my randiest and hormoniest my body could handle a recovery time like that. Can we be sure if every instance of masturbation came to a happy ending? Maybe he only got out his schlong to rub it a while four times. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/35 "2022-04-06T00:52:52Z")
Ah … I’m assuming facts not in evidence and reading “masturbating 4 times” as “to completion.” I guess it doesn’t necessarily need to be so. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/36 "2022-04-06T00:53:09Z")
I’m hoping he gets charged and it goes to trial and results in a hung jury. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/37 "2022-04-06T00:53:40Z")
Oh, come now. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/38 "2022-04-06T00:55:18Z")
“Wait, you forgot the coffee!” ---
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/39 "2022-04-06T00:56:59Z")
I am sure the SkyMall catalog he was looking at was brand, spanking new. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2022, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333/40 "2022-04-06T01:01:56Z")
To be clear—if you read the article, it says that the woman next to him did complain and he kept doing it after he was moved. Plus, they caught him masturbating four times. It doesn’t say he brought himself to climax four times. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/airline-passenger-arrested-for-masturbating-4-times-during-flight/962333.md?page=3)