# Alaskan Dork Builds Flame Thrower Wielding Mecha in His Backyard **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 18, 2005, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444 "2005-01-18T22:42:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2005, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/1 "2005-01-18T22:42:55Z")
[To quote Dave Barry, "You _can’t_ make this stuff up, people!](http://www.juneauempire.com/stories/011705/sta_20050117006.shtml) > [@](#): > > As Carlos Owens Jr. envisions it, the humanoid machine he’s building will shoot nine-inch nails from the shoulders and 20-foot flames from the forearms. “You’ve got to have flame-throwers!” he says. > > The red backlit eyes of his 18-foot hydraulic mecha - please don’t call it a robot - will glow, but they’re just for show. Five cameras will be the real eyes, allowing the operator riding inside the steel contraption to see via a laptop computer and flatscreen monitor rigged inside. > > When it’s all done, he’ll have a walking exoskeleton that will make him stronger than a grizzly bear, he said. So what if this is the stuff of science fiction fantasies? > > “I’m 110 percent positive this will work,” the soft-spoken apprentice ironworker said during a recent break from the all-consuming project taking shape in his parent’s back yard. “Failure is not an option. I have no choice but to do this. If I don’t do it, I will explode.” > > So great is his confidence that Owens, 27, already has arranged to debut his mecha at a demolition show where it will bash cars this summer at a local racetrack just north of Anchorage. Yow! ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2005, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/2 "2005-01-18T23:10:46Z")
Now why does “Head Like a Hole” come to mind? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2005, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/3 "2005-01-18T23:28:09Z")
[George Carlin]I sure would love to set fire to that guy, but he’s way over there. I wish there some way I could _throw_ the flame on him.[/GC] ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2005, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/4 "2005-01-18T23:31:40Z")
I went to one of Mark Pauline’s [Survival Research Laboratories](http://www.srl.org/) show once. Awesome. ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/5 "2005-01-19T03:34:54Z")
Chicks dig giant robots. ---
**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/6 "2005-01-19T07:04:16Z")
“training feet”? \ ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/7 "2005-01-19T07:25:56Z")
The strength of a bear? Meh, I’d rather have the strength of _five gorillas_. Even if I couldn’t be taller than 5’ 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/8 "2005-01-19T13:51:27Z")
Equipped with a 1920’s Style Death Ray, no doubt. ---
**Author:** ![audiobottle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@audiobottle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audiobottle)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/9 "2005-01-19T14:11:26Z")
> [@Incubus](#): > > The strength of a bear? > > Meh, I’d rather have the strength of _five gorillas_. Even if I couldn’t be taller than 5’ 😛 I don’t know, if you tried to pet a kitten, you’d crush it. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/10 "2005-01-19T14:32:11Z")
Let me guess…the guy is from Wasilla, right? ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/11 "2005-01-19T14:50:08Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Let me guess…the guy is from Wasilla, right? > [@](#): > > WASILLA - As Carlos Owens Jr. envisions it, the humanoid machine he’s building will shoot nine-inch nails from the shoulders and 20-foot flames from the forearms. “You’ve got to have flame-throwers!” he says. Yup. What interests me is this: > [@](#): > > Owens plans to pad a central compartment in which to operate the mecha, controlling it with his own movements. When he lifts a leg or flexes an arm so will his creation, according to the plan. Finally, the first step to myomer muscles and my 75-ton Marauder with dual PPC action! Let’s see… nine-inch nails roughly correspond to, what, an ultra autocannon-2? Dual flamers, those are one critical slot and generate three heat apiece… ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/12 "2005-01-19T15:08:59Z")
My favorite line of this whole story is > [@NuttyGuyInAlaska](#): > > “It’s costing me a bit, but that’s OK,” he said. “Dreams don’t come cheap.” Pure gold. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/13 "2005-01-19T15:52:12Z")
> [@](#): > > When he was seven, he dismantled a toy robot and put it back together. As a teenager, he wanted to build a boat, but his mother, Randi Owens, quickly put her foot down. Now she just watches as her son works on his most ambitious endeavor to date, even on the coldest days when numb hands are no excuse to quit. > > “He eats, sleeps and drinks this thing,” Randi Owens said. “This is his passion.” I wish I was that passionate about something. This guy (and his mecha) are awesome. I hope they update the story when he’s done. ---
**Author:** ![Anonymous\_Coward](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/94ad74/32.png) [@Anonymous\_Coward](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anonymous_Coward)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/14 "2005-01-19T15:54:38Z")
> [@lno](#): > > Yup. > > What interests me is this:Finally, the first step to myomer muscles and my 75-ton Marauder with dual PPC action! Let’s see… nine-inch nails roughly correspond to, what, an ultra autocannon-2? Dual flamers, those are one critical slot and generate three heat apiece… Well this is Alaska, so I’m sure there has to be some cold weather heat modifiers. ---
**Author:** ![av8rmike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/edb3f5/32.png) [@av8rmike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/av8rmike)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/15 "2005-01-19T16:08:34Z")
I was hoping he was building Truckasaurus when they mentioned the car demolition derby. But a mecha like the ones from _Matrix: Revolutions_ that looks like a Transformer is pretty cool too. ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/16 "2005-01-19T16:09:36Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > I wish I was that passionate about something. This guy (and his mecha) are awesome. I hope they update the story when he’s done. All I know is that if I was building this thing, once I was done, the subsequent rampage through downtown would make an update all but guaranteed. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/17 "2005-01-19T16:14:08Z")
“Let’s see . . . I’m 27 years old and have $20,000.00. Should I move out of my parent’s house or build a flame throwing robot?” ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/18 "2005-01-19T16:51:22Z")
> [@Neurotik](#): > > All I know is that if I was building this thing, once I was done, the subsequent rampage through downtown would make an update all but guaranteed. I know people lie about this all the time, but I’m eating a bagel and drinking fruit punch and I _almost_ just spit it at the screen. God my girlfriend would’ve been pissed. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/19 "2005-01-19T17:11:22Z")
Doesn’t this guy know he could probably be operating off of a billion-dollar grant from DARPA for this sort of thing? ---
**Author:** ![My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/My_Darn_Snake_Legs)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444/20 "2005-01-19T17:20:04Z")
I am in awe at the sheer awesomness of this guy and his creation. Even if it just stands still and he can’t get it to walk around like he wants it too it still shoots flames and nails. That’s awesome. Rampage indeed! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/alaskan-dork-builds-flame-thrower-wielding-mecha-in-his-backyard/285444.md?page=2)